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December 29, 2007

To all the people up in arms about "cheating" in Pro Sports

Folks, I have bad news for you:

*Pro* sports are not about "sport". They are about money. If you are a team that wins a lot, you get more money so you can hire better players. The losing teams? Not so much. Note, hire. You hire your players. You do not choose them, nor do you give them cookies. They are the employees of the team, and they are paid to play. If you want to see sports played for the love of sport, watch pickup games. If there are sponsors, if people are raising serious amounts of money for gear and the like, it's not about sport, it's about money.

Lots of money. Billions of dollars. How many of you really know what a billion dollars is? Not just the number, but what it will buy you. I do. Literally. It will buy you, in 1986 dollars, a B-1B transcontinental strategic bomber, crew, (pilot and maintenance), parts, and armament. People will kill each other for ten bucks, and y'all are somehow shocked that people will bend and break bullshit rules when we're talking about billions of dollars.

Give.your.heads.a.shake.

You want your teams to win, not "play well" and lose. No, don't even give me a buncha shit to the contrary. I know sports fans too well. You, the ones with the gear, and the towels and the toys. You want Super Bowl/World Series/Final Four championships, not "Well, we didn't go to the playoffs, but damn, we were great sports all season long." You may be able to lie to yourselves about such things, but if you try that with me, I'll laugh at you like the self-delusional idiots you are. Fans want winners. Period. They pay good...what's that word, oh yes, money to see the games, and buy their little trinkets. They spend money on the players, they want results. It's not the cheating that bothers them, it's when teams get caught, and then even worse, don't have the decency to have a losing season afterwards.

Face it, if the Patriots had ended with Miami's record this year, you'd not hear half the whining, because everyone who's not a Pat's fan would be sitting in front of the TV, all sanctimonious and smug, saying "cheaters never prosper". It is the fact that the Patriots took their penalty, and then went on to win every damned game, some close, most not, that really pissed everyone off. Bad. Because it's better to blame the Patriots for playing the way the fans, the owners, the sponsors and everyone else with money on them want them to, than for those groups to blame themselves. Me? I realized long ago that pro sports are about money, and this sanctimonious "sportsmanship" bullshit was for the losing teams to spout. Then again, I think the Raiders team that won Super Bowl XI were one of the best teams to ever play, and that Jack Tatum was the best fucking defensive back ever. Obviously, my priorities are better aligned with those of pro sports. Which is funny, because I'm not that into them.

Whose fault is it? Everyone's. How do you fix it? Remove money from it, and go back to watching pickup games. Get together with some other parents, buy your kids some gear, bring some sammiches, and watch them play just because it's the weekend. But if you're talking Pro/NCAA or even big High School, STFU about "sportsmanship" when we all know that it's the money that drives the game, and lots of it. Stop crying in your tea towels about cheating, and the lack of "fair play". Because as long as you have that kind of money involved, you'll have the people breaking the rules. Furthermore if you support it, monetarily or not?

You're a "cheater" too, just one without the talent to actually play.

There's no moral high ground in pro sports. Grow up and stop pretending there ever was.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 21:01 | Permalink


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I gotta say, I don't get Pro Sports at all. If it was a bunch of guys FROM Boston beating a bunch of guys FROM Chicago, or wherever, I could maybe see caring about it (If you're from Boston or Chicago.) But they hire these guys from all over the country; all over the WORLD now. "Our hirelings can beat your hirelings!" Who gives a shit?

Posted by: Arvid at December 29, 2007 11:38 PM

We have the same issue over here in England with football (soccer). I have supported Liverpool all my life and now I am beginning to fall out of love for the sport. We only have 2 English players in the team regularly. It isn't Liverpool. It is Liverpool World XI.

Arsenal who top the Premiership have only one English player most of the time. No wonder England's football team is doing so badly.

Money has attracted the foreign players to our league and although it is an exciting league and high quality it is effecting the national team.

As I understand it European law won't allow quotas so their is no going back.

How can a regular fan relate to a player who earns £80,000 a week. No wonder fans get upset when these high paid players don't perform.

They're too many players mediocre players earn mega money. If their was never a moral high ground at least their used to be pride!

Posted by: Michael Curtis at December 30, 2007 7:31 AM

@Arvid: This is the point I try to make with rabid sports fans who are actually open to self-examination. Once in awhile I can get in a few questions before hitting the wall of fandom.

How many players on your "home" team are actually from your home state? How many of them live here, and how many can't wait to leave here when they're not working? I'm supposed to maintain interest in a bunch of steroidal mercenaries?

And is your love for this game based upon the fact that your dad took you to see a lot of them when you were a kid? Whoops.

It ain't about the game. It's about what you did while spending time with your dad during an important time of your childhood. It could have been badminton, fishing or stamp collecting, as long as it was about the attention.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 30, 2007 12:22 PM

My moment of realization was when Sammy Sosa got his 600th home run. I was waiting for the cries of 'roids and cheater but they never came. There are only a handful of baseball players who have ever hit 600+ home runs--an acheivement that should get at least some of the attention of the Barry Bonds scandal. But absolutely nothing.

Sosa was actually worse in some ways than Bonds. Sosa claimed he didn't speak english well enough to testify to congress. I've heard him speak, his english is excellent.

What it really came down to is that Sosa is a likeable guy and Bonds is not. The issue with Bonds had almost nothing to do with illegal drugs, just your standard cult of personality issues.

Posted by: James Bailey at January 2, 2008 5:13 PM

You raised an *excellent* point. Face it, if Bonds had been a quiet, humble, nice guy, maybe even tomming a bit, the calls for his blood wouldn't be nearly as loud.

But he's kind of an arrogant fuck, so hang him high. You can do steriods, but to be arrogant? That's just not done.

Same thing with the OMGJANET'SBOOBIE !scandal. Justing Timberlake is practically sucking the public's cock for months afterwards, and he was the golden boy. Janet issued a couple of apologies, and was hung out to fucking dry, because she didn't debase herself with endless abject apologies.

Both have talent, but I sure as fuck respect Ms. Jackson more for her conduct. She showed a backbone and a heaping helping of dignity during the whole mess, and I think the way she was treated was bullshit.

But that's what happens when you don't pull a Swaggart when you fuck up.

Posted by: John C. Welch at January 3, 2008 7:42 AM

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How to make people who care about quality software run screaming from your work

This line, from Dave Winer (Gee, THERE'S a shock), ensures that not only will I never use his new toy, (not that I had planned on it, since I am the last person on the intertubes not using Flickr), but that I will never, in the future, voluntarily use any software he has had any sort of direct influence on:

I'm going to try to add one feature to FlickrFan every day.
I cannot imagine that kind of thinking...it's like a version of a bad commercial from the 70s: A sprinkle a day, helps keep smart people away...

That line just gives me the fucking willies man. Tell me again why people still kiss his ass? RSS doesn't cover THAT much.


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Why are "A-List" bloggers such drama queens?

I'm serious. You look at almost any time one of the "A-list" Bloggers recommends something as "the best blog of the year", or "the best writing", and about 70% of the time, it's a site talking about some personal tragedy. Someone's kid dying of cancer. Someone talking about how hard it is to move after a busted relationship. Someone kvetching that they have a really hard-to-pop zit. Billy won't ask them to the prom. On and on.

What, you can't write well unless you're "sharing" the trajedies of your life with the world? (Yes, I know, and I meant the plural of trajedi. It's not a tragedy. What happend to Ms. Bhutto in Pakistan? That's a tragedy. That nice young girl who was gang - raped in Iraq in a legally - protected manner? That's a tragedy. You get dumped and move? That's just life.)

I swear, it's like these idiots are wannabe TV News Bobbleheads, only they don't get to ask Mrs. Jones what here feelings were when she realized her husband was dead, so they have to find blogs about trajedi, then wax rhapsodic about how "This...this is what blogs and the internet are for...the human connection, bringing us together."

Fucking rubbish is what it is. It's picking over the emotional drama of someone who has no one else to talk to so they post their lives on the internet, and hope for the reactions in comments that they can't get in real life. It's some kind of emotional zombie feeding frenzy via remote access, only instead of "BRAAAAAAINS" they walk around chanting "PERRRSONAL HUMANNNN TRAJEDIIIIII". Someone wants to post the details about their failed attempts at a relationship with someone who their "real-life" friends were probably trying to tell them was all wrong for them anyway, fine, but for the love of DOG, don't elevate it to the level of people out there who are writing to educate, to elevate, to make us laugh, and sometimes do all three.

I'd rather read nothing but a month of PZ frothing on Pharyngula, or Gruber going deep into font and pen esoterica for weeks or Matt's analysis of the bizarreness that is NCAA sports in Oklahoma or Chuck's never ending "Name that car" which I never get, than some of this "OMG, LIFE IS NOT ALWAYS PERFECT, I AM IN A DEEEEP PIT OF DEPRESSION AND DARKNESS" emo shit that gets thrown up as examples of "TEH BLOG OF DA YEEEER".

Because I find that a) most drama - driven writing isn't that good, especially from the source, and b) that since I don't know these people? I just don't care. Remember folks, apathy is the emotional state of the universe. The sooner you accept that, the happier you'll be.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 09:37 | Permalink


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December 27, 2007

Another entrant for the 2007 Bynkiis

Under the heading of "My Pussy Hurts", we have this dingaling: Marc Fizman, aka "Captain Marc". Okay, so as soon as you see someone calling themselves "Captain" *anything* in an attempt to be all Old Sk00l haxx0riffic, you know you're dealing with someone who has the mental and emotional maturity of a 12 year old discovering the other uses for their privates...and that they'll never be sharing them with anyone.

Marc is sad. Sad Marc. Marc is sad because a free thing is no longer completely free. The Blue Meanies at Iconfactory have decided that the amount of work they do to keep Twitteriffic going requires compensation, and I don't mean a nice email and a handjob. I mean cash. Cold, hard cash. Filthy Lucre. That's right, the eeeeeevil bastiges at Iconfactory want MONEY. Even worse, if you want to use Twitteriffic without paying MONEY, you have to look at ADS!

MY GOD, IT'S LIKE LIVING IN A CONCENTRATION CAMP! WITH ADS! OMGWTFKHAAAAAAAAN!!!!!

Come on people, it's fifteen fucking dollars, and if you don't want to pay it, a random ad a few times an hour. It's not a fucking crime against humanity, nor did Iconfactory take your parents and your dog and make you live in a tar paper shack in the Mojave Desert. Marc's just another one in a long line of douchebags who can't stand not getting everything for free, and so is all whiny about having to pay fifteen fucking dollars for an app. Or see ads. Wah-fucking-wah. You want the best part?

The little pinhead doesn't even USE Twitteriffic:

but personally I’m spending most of my time in Snitterland and am loving it.
No, he's just doing this as a public service. Hey Marc, you want to be of service? How about you do something useful, like volunteering at an old folk's home, instead of being a whiny little cock about an application you don't even use.

Of course, you better not get too uppity with Captain Marc, or he'll try to insinuate that something bad will happen to you:

Idiot, eh?

You’re just asking for some hacker meditation, Mr Dillingham…

Not that the Great and Mighty Marc would do it himself, because hey, he's such a whining wuss:
@43: I’m merely suggesting you’re asking for an attack. I would, of course, never dream of performing such an attack myself.

Now it’s entirely possible there are people within my various circles who would dream of performing such an attack.

But I can’t be held responsible for their actions. Can I, Mr Dillingham?

Actually Marc, if it's shown you induced, through action or word, someone to perform an illegal act, then you can in fact, be held responsible. Ask Charles Manson about it sometime, I hear he's got time to spare.

GAH, the only thing Marc deserves is a good whuppin' with a switch. He's yet another fucking entitlement queen who thinks he "deserves" shit for free, because he's a "loyal supporter". In the computer world, "Loyal Supporter" is another way of saying "Big pain in the ass entitlement queen douchebag". They're like squabs: Make a lot of noise, and are unable to chew their own food, much less go out and get their own food.

"Captain" Marc Fizman: Entitlement Douchbag.


(Oh, for the record, no, I haven't paid for Twitteriffic. I've no problem with the ads, so I don't see a point, and it's got some strange shit going on with it that make me unwilling to drop the fifteen on it. But really, the ads are not bad at all. Hell, they're barely noticeable at all. Unless you're an Entitlement Douchebag. Like Marc.)


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Posted by John C. Welch at 18:38 | Permalink


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Not that the Great and Mighty Marc would do it himself, because hey, he's such a whining wuss:

....


But what to do about it? Caling them names won't really work, and shit like hacking them is descending to their level. So what to do?

Pot. Kettle. etc...


Posted by: LOL at December 30, 2007 11:51 PM

Um...LOL? While you're busy posting from your Verizon Wireless account, maybe you could oh, I don't know, make sense.

See, in the post you linked to, I actually DID come up with an appropriate action to take, one I have, myself, implemented. Shunning them. Don't read them. Let Rixstep's traffic fall to nothing but fanboys. Oh sure, it lacks teh dramah of the Sopranos-like BS Lil' Marc was trying to play. In fact, if you show the rest of that section you see that:

But what to do about it? Caling them names won't really work, and shit like hacking them is descending to their level. So what to do?

Expose Them

Go read Scott's take on it, then dead some of the crazy at Rixstep, including their ass-raping of Scott's good name at http : // rixstep.com / 2 / 4 / 20071221,00.shtml, and if you agree with me, call them out on your blog, site, lj, whatever. If you like, use my new Technorati tag with your post to make it easier for people to spot the kind of dicksnot they are.

Then shun them. Don't link to them, don't visit that site anymore, make them dead to you. Rixstep has the right to be a bunch of dogfuckers, but they can do so alone. Let them shit where they eat, and befoul whatever they touch, but let them do so in an oubliette. Shun Them.

Then send Scott an email so he knows he's appreciated.
"So what to do?" is, in this case, a rhetorical device. I already know the answer to the question, and indeed, am about to reveal it to the reader. The question here is simply a setup for it. Here's a tip, don't quote-mine someone else's own work, it makes you look foolish.

What's Marc going to do, make vague threats of hacktitude? That he himself will never carry out?

Maybe next time, you can try for just a stream of profanity.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 31, 2007 10:28 AM

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Get over Think Secret(ly dumb) already

Dear god, not only is the blogdorkosphere a big stupid echo chamber, but it's fucking ignorant too.

First, let's clear one thing up. Think Secret never mattered to me. Nick Ciarelli's little circlejerk of OMGWTFSCOOP!!!111 didn't matter to me, because Nick wouldn't have known anything I cared about if it bit him on the ass. No, really, can you imagine him with a "scoop" that SNMP was going to be massively better in Leopard? "SNMP? What the fuck is that? Moron, all I care about are iPods!" I think I read that site ten times in its entire history.

The IT world is a little more grown up about how we find out our info, and our methods work a shitload better than Nick's anyway. So the existence, or lack thereof, of Nick and his little wankorama site matters not to me.

The implication that "This will have a chilling effect on writing about Apple" is fucking lame too. It hasn't slowed down the requests for articles on Apple in my inbox one damned bit. Hell, I think it may be picking up. I didn't get any bad email from Apple for delving into the details on Leopard's SNMP implementation. Not a one. Who knows, with Captain BreakMyNDA gone, maybe people will calm the fuck down a little. Probably not. Anyway, this is not a first amendment issue. It never was, unless you're the EFF and Cory Doctorow, and your cock is sore from wanking about DRM, (which, for the most part is at least useful). Regardless of what dingalings like Matthew Ingram think, (and wtf is a Canadian journalist bitching about U.S. First Amendment rights for anyway? The Canadian version of the Official Secrets Act says "cast out the beam in thine own eye before thou pointest out the mote in mine"), the First Amendment is fine, or rather, this case isn't doing it any harm. No, it isn't, no matter how much Ol' Matt cries or whines about it.

See, what Matt, and too many others don't get is a fundamental point of the US civil judicial system. In fact, it may be the point: Lawsuits are the only way to settle a dispute in a legal forum. Bitch and whine about Mean Old Apple suing that nice Ciarelli boy all you want, but Apple had no other options to get the information. Well, not legally. Once they asked Nick directly, and he said "no", their legal options were:

  1. Walk away

  2. Take Nick to court
(I'm not counting arbitration, because that is an extralegal option that both parties have to agree to, it's not got the prominence or precedent-setting abilities of a suit in front of a judge, and quite frankly, Nick would have been an idiot to agree to arbitration, that shit is totally biased for the bigger company.)

Walking away wasn't really an option from Apple's POV. (Spare me the PR shit. The only people who think Apple needs that kind of PR still whine about HyperCard and Mac OS X not running on their fucking IIci.) They had people they knew were breaking NDA, and here's this little prat who knows he's getting NDA'd information, (It is impossible he did not. He got enough C&D's from Apple to keep him in free toilet paper forever), in fact, he's inducing people to break NDA,(Again, this is fact), and inducing people to break a legal contract, particularly where trade secrets are concerned is a major no-no. Apple had a case. Whether dorkosphere fanboys think they should have doesn't matter. I can't imagine too many sober-minded (oh look, just excluded Cory Doctorow) legal experts who wouldn't think Apple didn't have a good case.

True, they didn't have to sue him to get the info. But sending goons over to smack Little Nicky around is called assault, and is frowned upon in polite society. They could have hacked his site, but again, illegal. In fact, once you eliminate all shady/illegal options, and you realize that just walking away sets a bad precedent for Apple, the only option left was suing him, and allowing the legal system to work the way it was designed to work. Is that system stacked in favor of the rich and powerful? Of course, welcome to the entirety of human history.

But think about it. Once you removed the blathering idiots on both sides, and let the lawyers do their jobs, this was settled painlessly. No one roughed up. No one shot. No Karen Silkwood shit. It was all civilized. Keep in mind, Nick did not have to agree to the settlement. There was no gun at his head. (Yay civilized legal system!) He could have fought it if he thought he had a good chance to win, and had he won, the chances of the judge awarding him damages in addition to his costs would have been pretty decent. He chose to settle. That's how things work in this country. People may not like that lawsuits are the only option to get a dispute up in front of a judge, but that's how it works. If you think that this is some kind of OMGTOTALITARIANISM shit, go ask Benazir Bhutto what it's like getting stuff done under real totalitarianism. Or Walesa. Or a coal mining union sympathizer in the early part of the 20th century.

Nick Ciarelli settling did not kill the First Amendment in this country, nor whatever the equivalent is in Canada. It didn't even dirty it up. In fact, it showed that the system, such as it is, still works correctly, because if it really didn't? Then Apple would have won ten seconds after filing the papers, because when the system doesn't work, it never screws over the rich and powerful at the expense of the little guy.

Oh, and here's a tip for judging an issue pinging around the blogdorkosphere: The louder the blogdorksphere screams about something, the higher the probability that they're full of shit, and the truth is whatever is the opposite of their opinion.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 17:52 | Permalink


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Thank you!

There are times when FSJ's term "freetards" seems so apt, and people banging on endlessly about civil rights while talking about the Think Secret case seem to fit the word precisely.

He induced people to break their NDA contracts, and that's a legal issue in itself (I understand). I've tried looking at this from the other point of view and I just can't see it.

Beyond the legal and moral issues, I always had another issue with Think Secret: it was a total piece of shit, chock full of random guesses and worthless crap that hyped non-existent products to the point that people were actually *disappointed* when Apple didn't release them. That's not a legal or moral issue, just my personal opinion about the site.

I'm okay with every part of this whole issue and how it turned out.

Posted by: GaryP at December 28, 2007 2:21 AM

Putting aside the obvious moral argument, I can't see how it can be illegal to induce someone to break a contract. Sure, if you induce someone to commit a crime, that can be an illegal act. But inducing someone to break a contract is not any tort that I've ever heard of or read about.

In this case, Apple's legal team knew they were trying to do an end-run around the law. Only those who signed the NDAs are bound by them, and Apple's recourse is only against those individuals. Suing TS, or anyone, to divulge the names of those with the information is the easy way to get the information. The hard way is to hire private investigators, and read people's Apple email, and use surveillance. Apple wanted an easy way out, and the court found that TS wasn't required to give Apple any information.

If Nick had phoned me and told me who his sources were at Apple, I wouldn't be required to tell Apple. This was a case of Apple hoping they could break TS' silence with their huge legal budget, and for once, the little guy prevailed.

What Apple did here was stupid, because now it will embolden all the other TS wannabes out there to post info received from Apple employees, because they know Apple can't get the sources' names through a civil action.

Posted by: Mitchell Smith at December 29, 2007 12:36 PM

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December 22, 2007

Oh, and *this* one

I've been deliberately not commenting on the Think Secret settlement, because it's such a fucking mess of stupid that even thinking about it gets stupid on you.

But Dave Winer calling Apple "Fascist Scumbags"?

What a stupid fucking thing to say. Especially from someone so oppressed. Dave's a fat, balding white guy. In other words, Dave Winer is the man. Seriously. Let me lock that stupid fuck in a room with some real fascists. In five minutes, he'd be begging to lick Steve Jobs' balls and more if it meant getting out of that room.

Fucktard.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 22:18 | Permalink


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Uh, John, you might want to change that spelling to fascist. :-)

See you in Orlando.

Posted by: Suman Chakrabarti at December 23, 2007 11:44 AM

Now, I think, just in general, that Winer's a doofus, and that you're absolutely right about the abuse of "fascist" as a synonym for "not very nice".

But he isn't "the man" because he's fat, balding, or white (taking your word for it; I don't know what he looks like), any more than Colin Powell is being kept down because he has a lot more melanin then I do.

Plenty of bald, fat white men got kept down by the actual fascist movements that gained political power, after all.

Posted by: Sigivald at December 27, 2007 2:46 PM

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Why I pay more for hosting

As some long-time readers of this site know, bynkii.com is hosted by digital.forest, (I really need to get that banner up one day), and has been since the beginning of the site. They are not the cheapest hosting provider. They don't offer the most space. They don't offer unlimited bandwidth for a nickel a century. They don't have a supercaptaincoolguy control panel.

They don't have a lot of things.

What they do have is fantastic tech support, a thoroughly professional attitude towards things, and because of how they work, I know I'll never get emails telling me people are seeing this:

I guess he should have not let price be his only guide

(This is from a webcomic I recently started to read.) I've had steadily increasing bandwidth over the years, but I don't worry about shit like that. I have to pay for it, mind you. d.f. is cool, but they ain't running a charity. (SO CLICK ON MY ADS!) However, I know I don't have to worry about shit like that happening. So what am I paying for if it's not gobs of space and bandwidth?

Peace.Of.Mind.

Yeah.

I'll pay for that.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 21:39 | Permalink


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December 21, 2007

No, in fact I don't think I'll be letting this slide

While I am normally happy to poke fun at the crazy, the stupid, and the like, there is a level of crazy that even I have the sense to just leave alone, at least under normal circumstances. Like Rixstep, http://rixstep.com. That site is just a whole mess of crazy. Not the fun kind. I don't mean like the Andy Stone kinda crazy, which is the Nutty Professor kind. The kind that's a really nice guy, really smart, and working really hard to do good. It's just that you *really* want to know what his earth's gravitational constant is, because you have the feeling that it's just a wee bit different from ours

But we need guys like Andy, crazy as they are, because well, they make the world a lot more fun than it otherwise would be. I'd be very sad about a Mac OS X world without Andy Stone.

That's not the crazy I mean with Rixstep. Whoever the fuck runs that festering pool of shit is a decidedly different kind of crazy. The kind that decides that if you are not one of their sycophants, that you're unworthy of even basic human dignity. Disagree with them, for any reason, and they will attack you in the most immature, vicious, spiteful way possible. They claim to be long-time programmers and consultants, with a long list of impressive-sounding names to drop, but in reality, they're the idiot savants that prove every bad stereotype of computer programmers to be based in fact. They are an eternal Roy Stalin, forever screaming in anger at his defeat on the K-12 by Lane Meyer, and normally, I use them for my weekly moment of WHATTHEFUCK, but deliberately leave them alone. Because it's like fucking with a rabid chihuahua. The entertainment value isn't high enough to justify the annoyance factor.

Tonight ain't normal.

Rixstep, as part of their Joe and Wendy Whiner-ian jihad against Apple for not making Mac OS X a "pure" port of OpenSTEP, decided to poach a few years worth of Stepwise.com WWDC reviews, to show how Apple pulled a cross-platform bait and switch on us. Normally I wouldn't care what a bunch of Exceptionally Small-Penised, (ESP'd) nutters do. But, this has really upset Scott Anguish, who has run Stepwise for 13 years, and worked hard to make it a site that helps a lot of people learn to become better programmers. Scott talks about it, http://www.stepwise.com/

The deformed dldos running Rixstep stole a bunch of Scott's WWDC columns, and posted them in a way that would make it look like Scott agrees with Rixstep, and worse, actively supports their POV. This is most emphatically not true, and reading between the lines, I'll hazard that Scott's been on the receiving end of Rixstep's standard abuse for people who don't greet them on bended knee with open mouth. Judge for yourself:

Where is Stepwise??

Although it makes me sick to have to do so, I have temporarily pulled the main page of Stepwise off-line. The rest will likely go this weekend.

The "Rixstep" site has stolen a large chunk of my WWDC 1999 coverage and republished it without permission. I won't link to the article (I don't want to give him the spider traffic) but it is here http://rixstep.com/2/4/20071221,00.shtml.

Frankly, I can't take the stress of fighting this with "Rixstep", it makes me ill just thinking about it.

Let me just state...

I did not write this for him.

I did not write this for him to steal and misrepresent.

I do not agree that we were 'lead down the garden path', nor that there was a bait and switch.

My copyright has been violated by his reproduction. But given the track record, I see no way to stop him from doing this. He's published incorrect information about me before.

I only hope that the long-time readers of Stepwise will recognize that this is not my feelings on the matter, and that my co-workers also understand this.

Frankly, I don't know when, or if, I'll put Stepwise back online unless that content is removed from his site.

Fuck you Rixstep. To every one of the diseased leaky douchebags running that site, Fuck you, and the cayuse you ride while dreaming of a human sex partner. Scott has, for over a decade, made Stepwise a site that did good, that helped people. All you have ever done is shit on everyone who didn't beg you for another helping of jizz. You're a fucking blight on the Mac web. Even the delusional ravings of Rob Enderle are preferable to the slime trail you leave in your wake.

But what to do about it? Caling them names won't really work, and shit like hacking them is descending to their level. So what to do?

Expose Them

Go read Scott's take on it, then dead some of the crazy at Rixstep, including their ass-raping of Scott's good name at http : // rixstep.com / 2 / 4 / 20071221,00.shtml, and if you agree with me, call them out on your blog, site, lj, whatever. If you like, use my new Technorati tag with your post to make it easier for people to spot the kind of dicksnot they are.

Then shun them. Don't link to them, don't visit that site anymore, make them dead to you. Rixstep has the right to be a bunch of dogfuckers, but they can do so alone. Let them shit where they eat, and befoul whatever they touch, but let them do so in an oubliette. Shun Them.

Then send Scott an email so he knows he's appreciated.

Just in case Scott reads this:

Scott,

I may not have always agreed with you, and I know I probably went off on you at some point in the past, but I have always respected what you and Stepwise have tried to do, and largely succeeded at. You have a lot more people on your side than you think.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 18:56 | Permalink


Comments

Wow. Sounds like another case study for the Internet Fuckwad patient research that's desperately needed.

Which suggests something that I've been thinking about for about a year or so. A lot of what passes for tech journalism is actually linkbaiting crap. Exposing it with attribution, as folks like yourself do so well, necessarily provides the link that curious readers will use, to the inevitable profit of the crapmakers.

Is there any way for people of conscience to reference and refute detestable Intarnet scandalmongering (which seems to be on the increase, thanks to the lack of critical-thinking skills among our public-educated population) without actually providing immediate profit to said mongers? Or am I being 47-year-old-naive about the mechanisms available?

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 21, 2007 8:41 PM

For what it's worth, I've never even heard of "rixstep" before, or the people associated with it. While they may be assholes, they appear to be assholes with a rather small audience. Hopefully one that's shrinking.

Posted by: Jens Alfke at December 21, 2007 8:48 PM

Why would Stepwise pull their own content over this? Perhaps this Anguish guy isn't familiar with Rixstep? No one, anywhere, takes them seriously. They're the wild-eyed, raving derelicts of the Mac community. Actually, referring to them in the plural is giving them way too much credit. Near as I can tell, it's one guy, and he keeps all the crazy for himself.

Posted by: Chris B. at December 21, 2007 8:57 PM

adding nofollow will avoid giving them Google mojo but it won't stop people from clicking on it. Maybe just scrape their content (without their ads) or post a screenshot of their site so people don't actually have to go there.

Posted by: Mike Cohen at December 21, 2007 9:32 PM

Would a DMCA-type takedown be in order? I'd hate to invoke it but you use what weapons you have. Let their hosting provider know they are violating copyright (being a diseased douchebag is not yet a chargeable offense).

Posted by: paul at December 21, 2007 9:52 PM

I've never read stepwise or rixstep before. So I went to Google to find some content on stepwise.com, and couldn't find anything more recently dated than 2005. ? Then I tried Google Advanced Search for any new pages in the past year, and ... nothing. ?!


Posted by: much ado at December 21, 2007 10:58 PM

As I said in private email, thanks John.

much ado.

There haven't been new technical articles on Stepwise in about 2 years. Having the day job and the hobby now covering the exact same territory have caused that (I work in Tech Pubs at Apple in the Cocoa and Developer Tools group now). However, much of the older Cocoa technical content is still very much relevant.

Community driven content has moved away from a single content provider to individual blogs.

To support that the news links are updated constantly to interesting Cocoa postings and such.

But there is stale content, and stuff needs a general upgrade. Time is the enemy there.

Posted by: scott Anguish at December 22, 2007 1:34 AM

What an amusing internecine clusterfuck!
Payback for past arrogance?
Bunch of ex-NeXTers coming home to roost?

Posted by: Adolf at December 22, 2007 2:21 AM

Hey, your digg links are broke.

Posted by: Digger at December 22, 2007 9:50 AM

A blast from the past about the Rixter: http://perversiontracker.com/archives/000249.html

Posted by: Trevor at December 22, 2007 11:17 AM

Digger,

I know, but I've not had the time or the caring to figure out why Digg's code isn't working. I probably just have to pick a different option.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 22, 2007 1:18 PM

They are an eternal Roy Stalin, forever screaming in anger at his defeat on the K-12 by Lane Meyer

Let's hope the Rixster doesn't get his testicles tentacles all over anyone else...

Posted by: Gregg at December 22, 2007 1:27 PM

I have long felt Rixstep was one guy suffering from multiple-personality disorder, paranoid schizophrenia, and other mental maladies of which I know not the names, but now we know: he's just stealing content from other people (and then peppering it with historical inaccuracies and foul, inaccurate personal insults) -- of course it's going to look schizoid.

Posted by: Shazbani at December 22, 2007 3:35 PM

John, you just go ahead and try to rip me apart. But I'm cooler and smarter than you! Here's my response to your nonsense.

Posted by: Fake Rixstep at December 22, 2007 10:43 PM

Scurrilous Rogue! Base mendicant! Away with thee, away with the back to that bog of eternal stench from which thou crawled. Oh, do we not rue that dark day! Oh, do we not rue it so!

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 23, 2007 9:35 AM

Do I dare post a comment against this flow? I feel I must. As Mr. Anguish himself para-quotes in his comment above, this whole kerfuffle has been "Much ado about nothing".

Having read the original Rixstep article, I find two things.

One, it was clear to me that the statements sourced from Stepwise were quotes not theft - do you folks honestly think otherwise? They were in block quote style, in a different font to that of the narrator and, above all, the text before each quote made it clear that the following text was quoted from a source!

Two, let's clear this up once and for all, Rixstep's quotng of Mr. Anguish' content is perfectly legal and normal. See this blog post for a rundown on the legalities of fair use, and stop waving your DMCA flags.

Mr. Downes does have a raw and uncompromising writing style and will therefore put some people's backs up, but if you review his written output you can't help but notice how often he has been right on the money. Arrogant and even rude yes, but not wrong. Let's not let the messenger's style drown the message content.

Posted by: Dr. Ian Silvester at December 29, 2007 4:18 AM

So... it's ok for you to steal an entire post from the stepwise site and post it here because you agree with scott, but not ok for Rixstep to take some quotes because they don't? How is this fair use. Sounds more like something that happens in Communist China to me.

Posted by: LRM at December 29, 2007 2:01 PM

It sounds to me that the gentleman at Stepwise is unfairly indignant.
The Rixstep article quotes source and attributes correctly. An opinion is expressed and views are published.
A rational response to the criticism instead of a slamming the door against dialog would have been more appropriate.

Posted by: SLmanDR at December 29, 2007 8:59 PM

LRM, the difference is, if Scott asked me to change it, or add in commentary from him on this, I would. But, besides that, I didn't change his post, nor did I set it up to suggest he's saying something he didn't. That's a rather important point in all this, actually, it would be THE important point.

You're also ignorant about China. In China, there wouldn't be any bitching about copyright or anything similar, and you'd be damned lucky to have a blog in the first place. But you did attempt a strawman, so that's something. Something sad and pathetic.

SLmanDR

The point isn't about attribution, it's about reposting Scott's articles to make it sound like Scott either agrees with what Rixstep says, and that is Apple pulled a "bait and switch" wrt cross-platform cocoa, (which is ridiculous anyway, unless you think every mention of a product roadmap is a guarantee. If you DO think that, I have some nice oceanfront property in MO to sell you), or that Scott said that himself.

Neither is the case. It is that attempt to make it look like Scott supports that POV that is the problem here, not quoting quality. That's the scummy part. The stealing multiple years worth of posts wholesale, (and yes, there is a difference between a single post, and years and years of posts) is not helping Rixstep any.

Of course, your theory that rational discourse with Rixstep is possible is, to be mild, hilariously ignorant, although for someone who is a fan of Rixstep, unsurprising.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 29, 2007 10:45 PM

"they're the idiot savants"

"idiot savant" is probably not a good term to be throwing around in a spat of this sort, John. It's an old term that's been used by neurologists to refer to the extraordinary abilities that are occasionally shown by autists (c.f. Dustin Hoffman in _Rainman_) even sometimes by those who are in other ways severely retarded. Such people are interesting in themselves - take a look some time, for example, at the story of the twins in Oliver Sacks book _The Man Who Mistook His Wife for a Hat_.

http://www.oliversacks.com/hat.htm

It's possibly not a good term to use at all these days, but it most certainly shouldn't be used as a term of abuse. If "idiot savants" deserve anything, they deserve some consideration and support.

Posted by: Nick at December 30, 2007 8:37 AM

Nick,

I was well aware of how I used the term, and I meant it precisely the way I used it. If that, for whatever reason offends your sensibilities, that is your issue. Read that definition again:

noun ( pl. idiot savants or idiots savants pronunc. same)
a person who is considered to be mentally handicapped but displays brilliance in a specific area, esp. one involving memory.
I do consider people who are living examples of the stereotypical programmer, unable to interact with anyone or anything but code to be mentally handicapped, yet brilliant in a specific area. It is the perfect term to use for what I am talking about, although "brilliant" as applied to the morons at Rixstep is being rather charitable.

I suppose I could have called them "moronic cocksuckers", but that wouldn't have had the precision that "idiot savant" did in that case.

However, what you are describing is probably better described as an "Autistic Savant" which carries the more correct connotation that you are ascribing to idiot savant.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 31, 2007 10:11 AM

Post a comment

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New Logo!

I has a new logo!

Melissa did the artwork, and it's one of the best pics of me I've seen. There's still some tweaking left to do but I think it's really well-done

Posted by John C. Welch at 15:17 | Permalink


Comments

Wow! That's great!

Posted by: Arek Dreyer at December 21, 2007 3:22 PM

It IS pretty awesome, but your site! It looks almost... professional! Noooooooooooooooooooo1!!!!!1

Also, dude just got a new logo and immediately digg icons appear everywhere? Getting pretentious already eh?

Oh, and just to be a dick: it's faScist, with that extra S. Tweet tweet!

Posted by: Arthur Langereis at December 21, 2007 3:32 PM

Love it! What an excellent job Melissa did.

Posted by: Al Willis at December 21, 2007 3:33 PM

Sweet. Cranky, and suggesting that you just can't _believe_ something you've just heard some delusional twerp say.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 21, 2007 8:28 PM

Very excellent!

Posted by: Daiya at December 29, 2007 5:47 PM

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December 20, 2007

Quick points

  1. I've decided to come up with my own awards. After much Twitter deliberation, they'll be called "Bynkiis".
  2. T-shirts and new logo(s) are coming. The shirt prototypes may be at Macworld Expo. I'm going to go for quality first, as I hate a shitty t-shirt.
  3. Going to Orlando for xmas week. Shorts at xmas for the fucking WIN.
Posted by John C. Welch at 23:20 | Permalink


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December 15, 2007

They never can stop in time

Of course, with New Year's coming, it's time for lists. CIO.com has gone after both low hanging fruit, and a hitcount monster, namely, the iPhone, and Ten Reasons no to support the iPhone. Now to be fair, this isn't really a CIO.com - originated piece, but one from Forrester Research. However, I'm not paying almost $280 bucks to read the original bad analysis. I have gifts to buy, and no one on my list wants crap like that.

But, as an IT professional, I do have to read at least the CIO version, and while there are some really solid points, the others? Not so much. In order:

1) The iPhone Doesn't Allow Data on the Device to be Encrypted

There's currently no way for enterprises to secure sensitive data on iPhones through file or disk encryption, according to Forrester. There's also no way for IT to enforce password policies since the decision to use a password (and when to change it) is up to the user.

I do agree with this. While you can't easily stop someone from getting corporate email on an iPhone, (Unless you block the ability to forward email, and we all know that's not happening), the inability to encrypt data, or enforce password policies can make the iPhone problematic for the business world.

That's not the same as "OMGNO!!!!!!111". Not all businesses are the same, and encryption/password policies have to reflect the reality of that business. If you don't carry around sensitive data on mobile devices, or if all the iPhone is used for is email that doesn't have sensitive information, then this issue isn't. But, it is at least a legitimate point. Unlike the next one:

2) The iPhone Does Not Natively Support "Push" Corporate E-mail or Wireless Calendar Syncing

Push e-mail (e-mail that is delivered to handhelds immediately upon receipt in a user's mailbox) is an essential feature for a business device because of the productivity such a feature enables, according to Forrester. If users need to physically retrieve messages--as opposed to having those messages pushed directly to them--they won't get them as quickly as possible and they'll waste time in the process. The iPhone can sync with Microsoft Exchange and Lotus Notes over IMAP and SMTP, Forrester says, but IT infrastructure must be tweaked accordingly or a separate gateway product must be purchased and even then mail is delivered only every 15 minutes.


The Apple iPhone
Apple's device also doesn't wirelessly sync with PCs, which means users must have access to the company's proprietary USB sync cable to retrieve calendar updates or contact changes, according to Forrester. If a meeting plan or location has been changed at the last minute, an iPhone user on the go could easily not get the notification in time.

Okay, so this one's stupid. First, the push thing is hardly a life or death requirement. It's a convenience. IMAP on an agressive schedule means you get your email about every 15 minutes. While I tend to prefer every ten minutes, this is not something that's going to make you lose your business and end your days on the street. If someone has to get a hold of you for a meeting that's suddenly happening RIGHT NOW, here's a suggestion...you have a phone, they should CALL YOU. The same thing with the lack of wireless sync to individual desktops. First, that's such an unreliable way to sync, it created an industry to bypass the desktop, and have the phone sync directly with the server. Goodlink anyone? Exchange OTA ActiveSync? Those aren't popular because desktop syncing is so damned popular. It also ignores, completely, the fact that starting with Windows Mobile 5, and it's version of ActiveSync, Microsoft disabled wireless desktop syncing. So guess what? Yeah, Windows Mobile devices are just as screwed here. Besides, if you send an email, you'll get the friggin' thing in the next 15 or so minutes anyway, so it's not that you won't get it, you just won't get it now. Maybe..because Forrester ignores the fact that email is neither guaranteed nor reliable. If your network is getting hammered by a large scale SMTP attack, it is entirely conceivable that your oh-so-important email is going to get delayed. In a building made with much love for granite and steel? You may not have enough signal to get the email. On a plane? Not getting the email. Driving? Well, you may not get the email, and if you do, I hope to $DEITY$ that you aren't reading your email while driving. Forrester is living in a bit of a fantasy land here.

3) The iPhone Does Not Run Third-Party Applications Without Voiding Its Warranty

Though Apple has promised a software development kit (SDK) for the iPhone so that external developers and businesses can create their own applications to run on the device, the iPhone does not currently support such applications--unless certain device components are hacked, which voids the phone's warranty. Companies that deploy, for example, sales force automation apps on mobile devices won't be able to port those applications to the iPhone until this issue is resolved.

That's funny, it doesn't seem to have stopped SAP from porting its stuff to Web interfaces so its sales force can use iPhones. Who tested it? Why, another small company nobody's heard of: Intel. Intel had many nice things to say about it too:
"It didn't look like SAP," said Daryl Ganas, director of sales and marketing operations for Intel, one of several companies that has helped SAP test the software.

"It felt and looked to me like something my sales people would use," he said in an interview

It would seem that there is significant customer demand for such a thing. Not my words, but rather SAP's:
"The iPhone has become such a popular thing," said Bob Stutz, a SAP senior vice president who is responsible for developing customer relationship management software. "Everybody wants the ease of use of the iPhone."
Hmm...and it also seems that moving applications to a web UI would help deal with that whole "has sensitive data on it" thing. Funny that.
4) The iPhone Cannot be Locked or Wiped Remotely

Forrester says the single most important feature of mobile device management offerings is remote lock and data wipe functionality, both of which the iPhone lacks. Apple doesn't currently offer any mobile device management software that's anything like the many offerings available for BlackBerrys, Windows Mobile or Symbian devices. Forrester doesn't anticipate any vendors offering such a product before mid-to-late 2008.

This one's legitimate. In a case where you have sensitive data, phones are small and easily lost/stolen. A remote wipe function can be critical to a business.
5) The iPhone Lacks a Physical Keyboard

The iPhone's touch screen interface and virtual keyboard may be cool, but it is not ideal for power users who e-mail and text message very frequently. The problem with the touch screen is that it doesn't provide tactile feedback, according to Forrester, which makes it difficult to type without paying attention to every single key you hit. The faster you can type, the faster your messages get sent out and the more work you can do in a shorter amount of time. That's not necessarily the case with the iPhone.

Oh gimme a break. You aren't writing 3,000 word missives on a thumb keyboard anyway, and if you have big hands like me, there's not a thumb keyboard made that you can type any more accurately on than the iPhone's. I have to pay exactly the same amount of attention to my typing on a thumb keyboard as I do on an iPhone. This one is "Crap, we need something to make it ten, bitch about the keyboard again". Dear Forrester: no one really cares.
6) The iPhone Has Limited Carrier Support Outside the United States, It's Locked Into Carriers

The iPhone is currently only available through exclusive carriers in the United States, the United Kingdom, France and Germany, and it's locked to those specific carriers. That means business users who travel internationally can't use iPhones via the carriers they have contracts with in any other countries, even if those carriers offer networks that are technologically compatible, according to Forrester.

This one is semantic games. First, you can indeed roam with the iPhone. People do it all the time. It ain't cheap sometimes, but they can do it. In fact, I can get a (not free) international roaming option for my iPhone via AT&T. Again, it's not cheap, but that's not the same as you can't do it. As well, "Limited carrier support"? Oy.
7) The iPhone is (Very) Expensive

The iPhone sells for double what the average BlackBerry or Treo costs. At $400, plus voice and data charges, Apple's smartphone is one of the priciest such devices on the market, even after a $200 price cut last fall. Corporations seeking mobile devices often consider price a selling point, especially since many device makers or carriers offer business discounts and service plans. Apple and AT&T, the exclusive U.S. carrier, don't offer any such discounts for business use.

Oh for pete's sake, it is not. The big problem here is that you don't get any discounts. However, if you want an unlocked Treo or Blackberry, so you can more easily use it with other services, which is evidently quite important to Forrester as they point out in item 6), well, then the price changes a bit. Sans contract and rebate, a Tre0 750 costs more than an iPhone costs, as does the Pantech Duo, the Moto Q, the BlackBerry Curve 8310, the Blackberry 8820, the Treo 680, and the AT&T Tilt. Actually, even with the contract and the discount, the Tilt's only a hundred bucks cheaper than the iPhone.

But the worst part about this point is they bury the closest they come biggest reason why businesses should stay away from the iPhone for now in the last sentence of this "point":

Apple and AT&T, the exclusive U.S. carrier, don't offer any such discounts for business use.
They don't offer discounts, because you can't get an iPhone on a business plan, period. If I had to guess, there's exactly one company with an iPhone business plan, and they make the silly thing. Maybe AT&T has one too, but other than that, they're personal use contracts only. They are not being sold in a way that makes sense for businesses. The best point of all, and Forrester blows it, just whiffs it. That's what happens when you value hitcounts over accuracy, you miss the valid points.
8) The iPhone Is a First-Generation Device

No mobile device is perfect when it's initially released. In order for handset makers to refine their products, they often rely on their masses of users to highlight their weaknesses. Some of the iPhone's weaknesses are, according to Forrester:

The next iteration of the iPhone will likely address these issues. In fact, AT&T's CEO recently said a 3G iPhone is due in 2008.
Okay, Forrester's just cheating here, they bury 4 points in this one, but then again, they're all weak. As well, one point is something they bitch about later on, so that's even more of a cheat. But anyway. First, all phones can be difficult to activate quickly. I've had phones that took a long time to activate, I've had phones that took minutes. Windows Mobile , Palm, there's no guarantee that the process will work quickly 100% of the time. The same applies to the iPhone. This one's just stupid. Secondly, battery life on the iPhone is not significantly worse than any other phone, and better, by far, than the darling of the Windows Mobile set, the Q. The Q, at least the original release had a batter that could barely get through the day when it was doing nothing at all. In contrast, I can easily get through two days of normal use with my iPhone without a charge. If I can do that, I'm set. I'm not off wandering in the woods. I don't need a week without a charge. Third, the volume is indeed less than impressive, but the sound quality is quite nice. People have no problems understanding what I say when I talk on it. The last bullet is a scream. "aren't as fast as they could be?" Well, for that matter, neither are 3G speeds. That whole nastiness of the real world means you rarely hit theoretical max. Stop shucking for hits man, that's lame.
9) Apple Doesn't Offer Replacement Batteries for the iPhone

Apple doesn't currently offer battery replacements for the iPhone, so users cannot carry backups to ensure that they never lose power. Forrester says that third-party vendors will likely begin to offer replacements in the near future, but because the device needs to be disassembled in order to remove a battery and insert another, the replacement process may not be simple enough for less tech-savvy users.

That's because Apple doesn't do like far too many smartphone manufacturers, and ship the iPhone with a crap battery that can barely get through a day of normal use, (PPC-6601, XV-6700), or not even that good, (Moto Q) without a spare battery. If more manufacturers didn't ship with batteries that suck, this wouldn't be a problem. I'm amazed at how people are so Stockholmed by smartphone batteries that they now view a workaround to bad engineering as a plus.
10) There's No Proof That iPhones Are Suitable Business Devices

The only large enterprise that is known to fully support iPhones is--surprise, surprise--Apple, according to Forrester. And it hasn't published any case studies or other support materials. Enterprises often make mobile device purchasing decisions based on the experience of their peers or industry analysts' recommendations, but with such information lacking about the iPhone, Forrester says it won't likely be making its way into many businesses anytime soon.

First of all, stop relying on other people, like oh, Forrester Research to do your damned thinking for you, and secondly, based on what enterprise companies like SAP and Intel are saying, Forrester appears to be full of shit on this one.

Look, if you're going to let anyone's "Top Ten List" make your IT decisions for you, you have far greater problems than an iPhone. Analyze your real needs, then use that analysis to guide you. Six clowns wasted on moonshine could have come up with a better list of reasons for not supporting the iPhone in the workplace than this crap.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 11:15 | Permalink


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I had to stop reading when you cited SAP and Intel. SAP makes a living selling c..p to corporate idiots. Even mentioning them in the same article is a disserver to the fine engineers who designed the iPhone. ( caveat.. I once saw a nice SAP implementation, that companies IT department was run by a genius who went to the catbert school of management.. He told the SAP field-engineers to go to h..l and re-wrote most of the front end from scratch).

Posted by: MK at December 15, 2007 9:47 PM

The quality of SAP's software is immaterial to the main point, which is that enterprise companies see some value in the iPhone.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 15, 2007 11:28 PM

John your attitude conveyed in this article is unfortunate. Try to use less blaming, less cursing and a rather more freindly style.

Posted by: missti at December 19, 2007 6:51 AM

missti:

No.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 19, 2007 1:15 PM

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December 14, 2007

So, ID isn't about Christianity?

Hmm...because according to this interview with William Dembski, Mr. ID himself, (Thanks to ERV for the link!), it most certainly is:

4. Does your research conclude that God is the Intelligent Designer?

I believe God created the world for a purpose. The Designer of intelligent design is, ultimately, the Christian God.

The focus of my writings is not to try to understand the Christian doctrine of creation; it’s to try to develop intelligent design as a scientific program.

So one of the two biggest voices/proponents of ID, right up there with Michael Behe in being the "public face" of ID says point blank that ID is based on the Christian version of $DEITY$.

So much for it being about science and a valid scientific alternative to evolution. I wonder if it hurts when you fuck yourself in the ass like that? Especially if you don't stretch first. Fucking idiot, does he think anything can hide from Google?


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Posted by John C. Welch at 22:00 | Permalink


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John, it doesn't hurt at all, when you can compartmentalize the way these people can. Some of them harbor completely contradictory facts in what passes for their minds.

Especially if you believe that science is merely part of ghod's Mysterious Plan, something we poor schmuck humans can never completely understand.

Granted, some of them are just working their marketing jobs for a paycheck, and know very well what sort of shit they're shoveling. Some others are just showing up at church and writing checks they can't afford, because it all sounds like stuff they shouldn't bother trying to figure out. There are levels to this cult behavior.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 14, 2007 11:06 PM

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December 11, 2007

Liz Pulliam Weston is a self-centered cow

Yeah, and that's the NICE version of the title. I read a really well-done article on Violent Acres about the bullshit inherent in gift-giving and "real" gifts, and in it, Vi references another article from MSN called "Gift Cards are not Gifts". When I read the excerpts from the article, I thought that Vi had perhaps taken things out of context. Couldn't be that bad, right?

Wrong

Weston, (how appropriate that she's named after a suburb full of overfed yuppie larvae) spends two pages whining about how impersonal and evil gift cards are. That's right. In a world where you're lucky to get a "Thank You", she's whining about gift cards:

A gift, ideally, says, "I thought about you. I considered your likes and dislikes, your needs and wants, your dreams and desires, and found you this token of my esteem that I hope will delight you."

A gift card says, "There! Checked you off my list."

Hey fuck you, maybe that's all I had time for. Maybe there was some shit going on, and instead of ignoring everyone, I did what I was able to. Jesus, sometimes life sucks, and you don't have time to make doilies for everyone.
It's not just me that says so. Judith Martin, the doyenne of etiquette known to millions as Miss Manners, dismisses gift certificates -- and, by extension, gift cards -- as "a pathetic compromise convenient to people who do not trust their judgment about selecting the right present for those whose tastes they ought to know."
In that case, Miss Manners can hob my knob too. What happened to the ettiquette of "don't be a greedy bitch", aka, "judge not lest ye be judged"? What, that only counts for everything but gifts?
Think about it. Would a lover, in the flush of romance, lean close to the object of his affection and present . . . a gift card?
Reading that, I am SO in love with my wife right now, because a) she's not an ungrateful greedy fucknut like Lizzie, and b) if I handed her a gift card to Target or the Apple Store on her birthday or valentines, she'd be happy as can be. It's not that I can't get her a nice gift, but I also know there's a dozen little things she wants, but will NEVER get around to actually buying. So, I get her a gift card, and watch her have fun. It's like getting your kid a train set. So what if it's a lamer Lionel starter kit. Half the fun is watching people use the gift.
Would proud grandparents present the latest addition to the family with . . . a gift card?
You show me a parent who can't use a gift card. Kids are expensive, and people never get that shit right. Fuck clothes that are going to be too small in a fortnight. Right after my son was born, if you'd have given me a gift card that let me buy diapers for a month, I'd have fellated you on the spot. A gift card for new parents is a gift that makes their life easier. Who wouldn't want that?
Would your best and closest friend, the one you've known for years, who's stuck with you through the roller-coaster ride of life, walk into your hospital room and give you . . . a gift card?
No. They wouldn't give me a damned thing except a few minutes or hours to sit with me, tell me bad jokes, tell embarassing stories about me to the nurses, and in general, alleviate the boredom and terror of a hospital stay. How fucking thoughtless do you have to be to think "Hmpf. Drove out of their way to see me and only brought a gift card. Fucker"? Liz Pulliam Weston-level thoughtless.

However thoughtless that is, Liz Pulliam Weston is even worse.

The harm is that the art of gift-giving is quickly devolving into an entirely commercial exchange. How much longer until we simply start thrusting wads of dollar bills at each other?
Spin, Magic Wheel of Entitlement Douchery, Spin! There have been times in my life when I was blowing off bills so that I could buy groceries. Someone handing me a wad of dollar bills would have made me almost cry for joy.
Some people, apparently, would be delighted with that prospect. While researching party themes for my daughter's upcoming celebration, I stumbled across a posting by a woman who proudly included the horrifying words "monetary gifts would be much appreciated" on her 3-year-old child's invitations. She went on to explain that "I wanted money as gifts for my daughter's savings and for us to buy bigger toys, like a big kitchen and a Barbie Jeep that she wanted, instead of guests giving her small toys."

It's official. Shame is dead.

Pot, Kettle, Bitch

But it's on the second page that she shows just how unbearably entitled she is:

How would I have felt, for example, about the new friend I rushed to the hospital one night had she thanked me with a gift card rather than a basket of chocolate-dipped strawberries, each more luscious than the last? Of course, no gift was expected or required, but her thoughtfulness created a bond.
Yeah, a bond of "LIZZIE BETTER GET HER FUCKING REWARD, OR YOU JUST WALK TO THE HOSPITAL, BEE-YATCH!". Some bond. I got news for you Lizzie, maybe you expect a fucking reward for being a decent human being, but the rest of us grew up. You know what I want for rushing a friend to the hospital? The "reward" of having not having their funeral be the next time we hang out together. What kind of jackoff entitlement bitch douchewad gets pissed because they didn't get fucking gourmet candy as a reward for not letting a friend die? CANDY. How old is this bitch, three?
Or would I have felt nearly as welcomed by my new mother-in-law if, on my first Christmas as a wife, she'd presented me with a gift card rather than the antique soup tureen that had been in her family for years? Her present told me I was part of the family.
Or that she knew you'd be an insufferable bitch to her son if you didn't get some Martha Stewart Fantasy. How dare you expect anything as a gift? Or a gift at all?

But I bet you anything, Lizzie says "Oh, it's the thought that counts" six times a month. Hypocritical asshole, that's all she is: a hypocritical asshole.

And should I give up trying to please my husband who is -- Kenneth Cole as my witness -- one of the hardest human beings in the world to shop for? I think not. With each gift, and each return, I learn a little bit more about his tastes and style. It's a challenge to delight and surprise him, but occasionally I do -- and it's worth the effort.

Yeah, I bet he's thrilled, because you know that Lizzie ain't putting out unless she gets some fucking thing involving candied platypus eyeballs served on a hand-carved mahogany dildo. This guy has to be wanting to eat fucking glass every time he gets a gift from his wife. With her sense of GIMMEGIMMEGIMME he's got to be thinking, "No one told me I was really marrying AUDREY II!!! HERE! I KILLED SOMEONE FOR YOU? IS THAT SPECIAL ENOUGH YOU PASTY-FACED HARRIDAN?"

I want to add something here. Note her phrase, "...with each gift and each return..." Now, is it just me, or does that sound like someone who is way too fucking busy to actually, oh, pay attention to her husband, to listen to him, and actually know what he likes? Yeah, you bet. I'll bet you a box of hot Krispy Kremes that what he likes has verrrry little to do with what she thinks are "proper" gifts for him. Stupid bitch, try listening to what he says instead of what you want to hear. I've had better luck with bartenders I barely know than you do with your own *husband*.

It also drove home the point, as few things do nowadays, that special occasions are about people -- not about getting more stuff or increasing our net worth.
Wait, Wish-I-Was-Martha spends two pages bitching about the quality of stuff people give out, and then says it's about the people, not the stuff or the cash? I have one question for Lizzie:

Aren't you even a little afraid there's a hell?

Here's how you handle a "situation" where someone gives you a gift card instead of a hand-waxed donkey scrotum:

"A gift card? Wow <name>, thank you so very much! There's a dozen things I can use this for. What a thoughtful present."

If you can't bring yourself to say that for a gift card, and mean it, then fuck off, you don't deserve to get so much as a flaming dog turd on your porch for a present.

You want to know what's wrong with gift - giving in general? That self-important entitlement queens like Lizzie are treated with anything other than derision and mockery.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 23:55 | Permalink


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keep in mind.... she's a girl... they care for that (instantly, bree from housewives springs to mind ;)

as a kid, I ALWAYS requested hard cash. drove my grand-parents to tears, they were trying to give me actual presents.... which I always refused...

Posted by: CyMan at December 12, 2007 1:15 AM

I always asked for money, until people complained about it. (Apparently the rumor went out that I was spending present money on bills, the horror!!) So now I ask for donations to certain funds. Last birthday it was the Get Paul an iPhone Fund.

And I did, so fuck you Weston. (Also the name of an evil company I used to work for, scary!)

Posted by: Paul at December 12, 2007 3:21 AM

I do ALL of my shopping at the bank. No one yet has turned their nose up at cold hard cash. Besides, I do not live with the people I am buying presents for ... how would I know what they want? In conclusion, cash is the ultimate gift certificate.

Posted by: Improbus at December 12, 2007 8:42 AM

"Young people, especially, are so enamored of gift cards, with being "empowered to make their own choices," as one retailer laughably put it, that they don't even realize what they're missing."

As a young person, I'd happily use gift cards and cash to pay my electric and grocery bills... cause all "young people" must have perfect parents who can afford to support and raise them leaving us "young people" to feel empowered when we get to choose what (useless for survival) shiny shit to buy. I'd be so fucking grateful for the financial help... more so than chocolate covered strawberries. Who NEEDS that?

Posted by: Rebecca at December 12, 2007 10:29 AM

What a great post.
Cheers.

Posted by: Sarah at December 12, 2007 10:33 AM

Another thing that pisses me off is how every "appropriate" gift she mentions is both expensive and useless. A "soup tureen"? Holy shit, is she dining with the Vanderbilts on Tuesday after croquet?

bah.

Two of the best gifts I've gotten were a detachable keychain, and a poster commemorating 50 years of Playboy cartoons. Total cost was maybe ten bucks.

At my wedding, I was so happy that my friends and family were able to be there that I didn't give a rat's fuck about what they got me in addition. Too bad Lizzie's all about the bling, she seems to have forgotten some things.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 12, 2007 10:37 AM

Excellently written. A great Stumble. For our wedding, my husband and I asked for donations towards buying our home--we 'gave' pieces of our home in return. For example, in the Thank Yous (that we DID write immediately after honeymoon) we enclosed a photo of a door, kitchen table, curtains, etc to show the giver just how put their generous gift to use.

Nothing like seeing the other side of generosity to make me feel even more generous to my loved ones. Well done.

Posted by: TDF at December 12, 2007 11:16 AM

What a whiny bitch. Here's someone who basically wants to make gift-giving all about her. When she gives, she wants you to be wowed by how creative and thoughtful she is, and when she gets, she wants to know that the giver labored over the decision. Must be nice to have that kind of time on your hands.

People like this hate gift cards because they already have magic plastic cards that get them anything they want: they're called credit cards.

Thanks for this post. Makes me grateful to have a wife who appreciates whatever I give her.

Posted by: mcgrimus at December 12, 2007 11:33 AM

I would rather not bash on Ms. Weston and her blatent pretention. Her words say enough about herself and her perspective that mine only can dilute and confuse what is obviously there (or, for that matter lacking).

However, what disturbs me most about her post is that someone may believe they are offending me or many other people I know by having the apparantly poor taste to give gift cards or even (gasp) cash.

Certainly, many of my friends and relatives know me and my tastes well. However, they don't necesarily know what may particularly satisfy those tastes. Sometimes, also, I would like a gift that costs more than I would ever want anyone to spend, such as that iPhone mentioned above. I think nothing less of of anyone who may give me a gift card or cash as a gift.

For that matter, I think nothing less of anyone who might give me nothing more than a brief note and well wishes. After all, it is the thought that counts!

Posted by: DF at December 12, 2007 12:18 PM

I love you.

Posted by: skip at December 12, 2007 12:26 PM

People like Lizzy Weston are a prime example of what's wrong with the world. I've encountered too many of them to be surprised, but being faced with them never fails to depress me.

Luckily my friends and family know that nothing gives me more joy than spending hours browsing the shelves of a favourite book store, gift card in hand... Even better, they know I don't want anything other than continued friendship for doing the things that friends do for each other.

Posted by: Fred at December 12, 2007 12:41 PM

Ain't no rant like a John Welch rant!

(with apologies, I'm really as whitebread as they come)

Posted by: Phil Burk at December 12, 2007 12:59 PM

Right on. My neighbor helped me install a garden door this summer. He does woodworking and carpentry, but I don't know for certain what he has, wants or needs in his shop or toolbox.

But a gift card for Lee Valley Tools sure put a smile on his face.

Posted by: djb at December 12, 2007 2:03 PM

omg, you are hilarious.

Anyone who wants to get me a gift card, feel free.

Posted by: Busy Mom at December 12, 2007 2:28 PM

Vi at Violent Acres sent me here and I'm glad - your takedown is hilarious. Thanks for a good laugh!

Posted by: Brenda Helverson at December 12, 2007 2:49 PM

I love you. Please accept my proposal of marriage. I won't even ask for an antique soup tureen.

Posted by: Detached at December 12, 2007 3:40 PM

Self-centeredness aside, Liz's problem is based on ego. She doesn't like gift cards. She is (supposedly) a smart person whose financial opinions are listened to and even paid for. Therefore, all her opinions are worth listening to and paying for.

She's unable to separate the rest of the world from her own head, because in her world, everyone agrees with her.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 12, 2007 3:49 PM

The last wedding I went to, several friends and I got together enough money for a professional wedding photographer. This was cash, handed to the bride's father to pay for the photographer. I wonder what lovely Lizzie would think of that?

Posted by: James Bailey at December 12, 2007 4:12 PM

You and Vi should start a glossy. It'd be SOOO refreshing!

Posted by: Michiel T at December 12, 2007 4:13 PM

Good christ. I roll my eyes at Liz Pulliam Weston AND this Bynkii person. Both apparently have too little of real consequence to consider in their lives.

Posted by: MC at December 12, 2007 4:27 PM

Money always makes a better gift. ALWAYS. Gift cards are great, actual cash is better... or a massage. But then they could just give me a gift certificate for a massage... o.0


People bitch too much about everything. Someone will always be there to be the jerk and complain when no complaint is warranted. What can you do.

Posted by: KM at December 12, 2007 5:12 PM

Reminds me of a post I made a while ago as a guide for Christmas gift-giving...
http://knibbe.fmly.ca/hungary/2006/11/christmas-season-handy-guide.html

Posted by: Eric3 at December 12, 2007 5:26 PM

Great post. Nothing more I hate than snooty bitches trying to play the next Martha Stewart. Personally, I'm on a tight budget, so to me a gift card means Opportunity; last year an AMC gift card meant I could go to the theater a few times, a Melting Pot gift card meant I could have a date at something a little nicer than an Applebee's, and a Target gift card meant I could spend a little extra money on something I had been wanting, but couldn't budget for. Those were great gifts, and I was completely grateful for every bit!

I personally don't give gifts. Instead, I take people out to do something and spend time with them, to let them actually know I care about them more than monetary goods. I hate the commercialization of the holidays, and by taking people to dinner, or a movie, or ice skating, or whatever, it strengthens our friendships and is more fun than opening a gift; it makes memories too. I finally got my family to stop giving gifts, and we instead take a nice vacation every year using the money we would have spent on things nobody wanted. Again, memories and fun are better than a better blender.

Posted by: Dave at December 12, 2007 5:53 PM

Obviously she doesn't remember what it's like to be on a tight budget. Gift cards for favorite stores can be bundled together to buy yourself something nicer than you could afford on your own and beyond what any one individual could ever be expected to buy for you. Or it means you can eat in a tight week. Or it means you can buy something to please yourself, without having to feel guilty about not spending it on bills.

Gift cards are GREAT gifts, when it's the right card for the right person. And buying the right card, or buying a card for the kind of person who would really appreciate it, shows that you care enough about them to know that they would rather receive a $20 card for Starbucks than some crappy glass candleabra set.

Posted by: Morrigoon at December 12, 2007 6:53 PM

Oh, god that was funny, and true. I may not need money to pay bills but there's things that I want that would be a copper plated pain in the ass for some one else to buy for me, and then give to me, just because of the complexity of transferring it.

That, and I remember last year my parents gave me a $100, I used it to take my cousin and his wife to the movies. I had a good time, and they had a good time, and they appreciated it.

Posted by: Joseph at December 12, 2007 8:20 PM

Good christ. I roll my eyes at Liz Pulliam Weston AND this Bynkii person. Both apparently have too little of real consequence to consider in their lives.

And yet MC, you read both articles, and left a comment...doesn't say a lot for the deep meaning in your life, does it.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 12, 2007 10:42 PM

Thank you for this.

No, seriously. Thank you. You and V both. If I had a blog, I'd thank her too.

Bitch, I'm a college girl trying to live on my own, pay for books and tuition, and still keep my head above water. I'm sorry if my parents don't pay for everything like yours obviously did, but I don't need an antique tureen. I need money. Do you think I can box up the tureen and send it to my bank after they give me a bill? No. What will happen to the tureen is I will eventually sell it to my neighbor so he can use it as a bong and I can pay the rent.

Posted by: Maddi at December 13, 2007 12:12 AM

I don't want to be accused of defending this Liz person, because I haven't actually read what she wrote, but I'm thinking there are two sides to this one.

Firstly, like most other people here, I'd be thrilled to *receive* a gift card as a present, would spend it gladly, and would definitely not think any less of the person who gave it to me.

But secondly, and I think this was perhaps the point Liz was trying to make, I'm not so inclined to *give* one. Unless I'm really short on time or ideas, I'd rather put in a bit of extra effort to choose something I think reflects both my friendship with the recipient and the occasion at hand. Who knows, maybe my ideas and my gifts suck and the person would really prefer a gift card, but I'd like to think my careful selection counts for something.

Judging by the throngs of people crowding out the malls at this time of year, I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who feels this way.

Posted by: Jillian at December 13, 2007 2:32 AM

The message I keep getting is that we should all be expecting gifts this season. Hey, I'm an entitlement whore with the best of them, but I'd rather see my family and friends, and spend time with them, or spend an hour on the phone with them catching up, especially now I've moved to a different country, than sit there, measuring my popularity buy the quantity and quality of the gifts or cards I receive.

It's the thought that counts, and if sending a giftcard says I'm thinking of you, then so be it. Seems like Liz needs to remember what it's all about.

Posted by: enjoli at December 13, 2007 4:35 AM

You couldn't possibly be referring to the stylish suburb of Weston, Florida with its gated communities full of white collar criminals and jackasses could you? Please tell me there isn't another Weston that's even worse, because that would just be too depressing for me to handle.

Posted by: Wide Lawns at December 13, 2007 8:31 AM

awesome post. came here from VA. I think you should send this to this Lizzie character. I think it'd be funny.

Posted by: Sarah at December 13, 2007 8:32 AM

Great post - Screw hallmark holidays.

I truly enjoy peering through the filthy window into another bitter persons life.

Gift cards are awesome - Cash is even better.

& Gift cards can be thoughtful -
BestBuy = GOOD , Walmart = BAD

Anyone receiving unwanted gift cards may forward them to me.

Posted by: scartx at December 13, 2007 9:01 AM

Wow. Liz is talking about the "art of gift-giving" as an etiquette-based tradtion, and you lambast her as being selfish and judgmental? When all this post is full of is your whiny, selfish and judgmental ramblings about how she's such a bitch because oh no, she has this well-thought out post about why she doesn't like something?

I mean really, your first argument sets the tone of idiocy for the rest of your bitchfest: "Hey fuck you, maybe that's all I had time for. Maybe there was some shit going on, and instead of ignoring everyone, I did what I was able to. Jesus, sometimes life sucks, and you don't have time to make doilies for everyone."

So you get defensive right off the bat when she says gift cards say "checked you off the list!" You say "FUCK YOU IT'S ALL I HAD TIEM FOR!!!" You're admitting you didn't/couldn't give something that takes more time/effort and figure a gift card "is better than nothing! AT LEAST I GOT SOMETHING DAMN LIEF SUCKS SOMETIMES MAN!!! OH AND YOU'RE A STUPID FUCKING COW SUBURB BITCH TOO!!" Why all the character assassination? Don't actually have hardly any reasoned, valid points to refute her article, do you? Probably because you missed the point of half of them.

Posted by: first and last time reader at December 13, 2007 9:41 AM

Wow. Liz is talking about the "art of gift-giving" as an etiquette-based tradtion, and you lambast her as being selfish and judgmental? When all this post is full of is your whiny, selfish and judgmental ramblings about how she's such a bitch because oh no, she has this well-thought out post about why she doesn't like something?
Did you even bother to read anything, or decided that O NOES! TEH BADDZ0R LANGUAGE! and decided you knew what the post was about. If she wants to give overpriced, hand-made stuff, that's her decision. But, getting pissy because a gift from someone else isn't up to "her" standards? Then turn them down. Have the balls to say "I don't accept gift cards, nor do I associate with the people who give them." She's just pissed because the rest of the world isn't making candied yak cock, and can't understand that a gift should be appreciated and accepted no matter what.

Of course, she can't be bothered to actually get her own husband something he'd actually want, so the idea that she's listening to anyone but her delusions of Martha is ridiculous.

Why all the character assassination? Don't actually have hardly any reasoned, valid points to refute her article, do you? Probably because you missed the point of half of them.
Pot, kettle, black much?

Here's a perfect example that I got her point, and that you're a stupid fuckstick:

Would proud grandparents present the latest addition to the family with . . . a gift card?
Actually, i was thrilled that someone understood that new parents need a metric ton of mundane crap, none of it cheap. Gift cards paid for diapers, forumula, a second car seat, and so forth. They were in fact, wonderful thoughtful gifts, especially the ones from grandparents and relatives, because it showed they thought enough to resist the temptation to buy crap that would have been pretty, but rather unneeded, and instead got us a gift that we really needed.

That's the part of "thoughtfulness" that Lizzie keeps missing. She's so deep into her OMG SOUP TUREEN delusions that she forgot that the best gifts are the ones that show you really listened. Maybe if she did more listening, her husband wouldn't have to return any, much less so many, gifts.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 13, 2007 11:48 AM

When I was still in school a friend gave me a card with a $50 in it for my birthday. He said he wanted to get me a book but with the size of my collection it is impossible to know which one. His plan was that we would spend a day in bookstore - which we did. It was brilliant - we talked about books all afternoon, had a coffee and I had a gift that was doubly cool: books and a day with a friend.

For years I've been telling people that I don't want gifts, I want to spend the afternoon doing something with them. I particularly like this with friends who have kids that I don't get to see often. And for them, as gifts I do give gift certificates - home made ones that say "good for one night of baby sitting" which seems more appreciated than some knick-knack.

I'd love to see you and Violent Acres ranting together after a few drinks.

Posted by: devon at December 13, 2007 11:57 AM

Last week my employer asked me what I'd like for X.Mas because she was wracking her brains thinking of a gift that I would like/appreciate/enjoy. She mentioned some thoughts, like a good rolling back pack since I'm starting college next year, or another camera lens for my photography addiction, etc...

And I smiled knowing that she was actually wracking her brains to find a gift for me that I would love. But rather than a back pack or new camera lens I suggested that, although it might seem lame because I didn't know her take on it, I would seriously appreciate a gift card to Target more than anything right now.

Because what she doesn't know is that I actually NEED socks that don't have holes in them, sweat pants so I don't freeze at the gym in shorts for the winter, and underwear whose elastic isn't stretched out. And if the gift card holds a significant amount I could also stock up on dog food, and toiletries.

The first year I started working for her I received $1000 bonus for X.Mas and literally burst into tears at such generosity. I was able to make three car payments out of that.

The second year I worked for her I received $500 bonus for X.Mas with a few extra very adorable gifts. The cash went to pay bills.

This is the third year I'm working for her and I have a sense that financially things are a bit more tight for her, but the fact that she mentioned she was hunting around for gift ideas for me was a gift in and of itself.

And seriously, to all those who have known what it's like to struggle financially during those years you're getting yourself ready for the rest of your life, there's an understanding and acknowledgment that a gift card makes all the difference.

Oh, and just to add: Chocolate covered strawberries, for me, would have been gladly received, and appreciatively thanked for, but would have gone straight to someone else in the house whose metabolism is faster than mine.

The best gift that Lizzie could get in life, in my opinion, is the gift of financial struggle; it takes the snob out of the snobbiest of all of them.

Posted by: Anon Ymous at December 13, 2007 12:25 PM

The only gift I like is being able to keep as much of my money as I can. As a young person with lots of bills, I like receiving practical gifts of shit I would have to buy anyway like groceries, gas, or ink cartridges. If I'm living with holes in my shoes what am I going to do with a fancy digital camera? pawn it. I'm sure Weston would prefer that someone deign to buy me a gift card than to see their preciously chosen gift end up that way.

Posted by: lynne at December 13, 2007 1:30 PM

Personally, unless it is a well thought out gift, I prefer cash rather than gift cards. Reason is simple: cash is a universal gift card.

With gift cards inevitably I end up with $10 at one store and $10 at another, and so in order to actually use them I have to start spending my own money. As much as I appreciate the gift, having to work out how best to use them kind of sucks the joy out of it.

Cash or pseudo-cash (card that says "go out for dinner to the value of $x), is something I really appreciate. However, in order to get around some people's issues with cash (which is definitely not universal), it helps to have a 'cause' to put it towards.

This year I have the "new bed" and "trip to Europe" causes. If friends or family gift cash then they can explicitly put it towards one of those two things. Even if it is just a couple of bucks, I would be very happy with contributions!

Cheers, Chris W.

Posted by: Chris White at December 13, 2007 1:53 PM

You know I really agree with you and V. I hate that bitch too, she is greedy and slefish.

But I really, really hate that part of her taking a friend to the hospital and talking about not getting her fucking precious basket of chocolate covered strawberries yet instead gets a gift card. Oh and also even though a gift is not needed it can still create a bond

JUST BE DAMN HAPPY YOU SAVE YOUR FRIEND'S LIFE ASSHOLE! WHEN THE PERSON YOU SAVED REALIZED YOU'RE THE ONE WHO MADED SURE THEY ARE ALIVE THAT WILL CREATED A DEEPER BOND THAN SOME CHOCOLATE FUCKING COVERED STRAWBERRIES!

God it's people like her that remind me why there are still fucking idiots out there...

Posted by: Matthew at December 13, 2007 6:37 PM

I forgot to put this in there.

To cover my own ass I know that what she stated what not real but a fake situation. Still that does not give her the right to say that she deserves a reward for saving someone, just be happy the person is alive damn it!

Posted by: Matthew Rogers at December 13, 2007 6:40 PM

This post makes me giggle. I also was directed her from violent acres. Has Liz forgotten about the tradition to give babies savings bonds so that when the child needs money in x number of years they can have it? I got savings bonds as a baby, and hell, they're gonna help me by a car when I'm in my 20's. Wow, something I can use for YEARS! What about me wanting to give a gift to a friend that I just don't know their clothing size? Why not give them a gift card so that they can pick their size, or clothes they need for something so they don't have to stand in the stupidly long and obnoxious return line? I would think not having to deal with returns is a gift in itself.

Posted by: Kelsey at December 13, 2007 11:16 PM

Liz is all about showing off to the neighbors in her McMansion subdivision. It's a very ancient form of tribal behavior, where you publicly demonstrate how much wealth you can afford to blow on useless, expensive trinkets.

And I'll bet she expects this sort of thing in return, because a) that's all her life is likely about, and b) she writes for a venue which drives (and is driven by) sales of consumer items. I'll bet it's perfectly natural for her to assume this shallow level of thought is a legitimate component of "etiquette."

I also doubt she writes "personal finance" articles for the sort of middle-class folks who truly need advice to manage their monthly budgets. Her prose pulls me away from the supermarket, and towards the boutique.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 14, 2007 9:42 AM

In a family of print and digital junkies with bookshelves overflowing and hard drives bursting at their ...seams? There is nothing more reasonable or thoughtful than a gift card. As much as the various members of our family may love each other there is just no way even the most intimate of partners can be sure their carefully selected book, software, gadget, movie, music hasn't been downloaded, borrowed, or bought minutes before Christmas morning.

A gift card for the local indie bookstore? I'm in a heaven, a 2nd copy of that book that may be #2 on the bestseller list but sucks anyway... not so hot, enough credits at one of my fave stock photo places to have my creative juices oozing? Awesome... so what if it doesn't come wrapped in pretty little package, a red and green email background is just fine :) Perhaps the real problem for miss thing is exactly what she claims is the problem for the gift card crowd... she wants to give everyone else what SHE thinks they SHOULD want, instead of making the recipient happy...

Posted by: Wendy at December 14, 2007 12:26 PM

Thanks John - I have not laughed this hard in days! First time reader/poster who will be laughing about OMG SOUP TUREEN for many days to come!

Posted by: Byron Van Arsdale at December 14, 2007 3:09 PM

I think the point that she was trying to make is that people who give gift cards are poor or socialy inferior to those that do not. For example;

(If the answer to any of those questions is yes, by the way, you need to start hanging with a better class of people.)

And to top taht off, there is the repeated refrences to "Judith Martin, the doyenne of etiquette known to millions as Miss Manners" and others like her."

Who the fuck are these people? I do not know her, but would venture to say that She is obviosly an elitist arrogant bitch.

Happy Holidays!

P.S I hope i get some giftcards, it would be better then an art set I got last eyar but never used!

Posted by: Alex Bown at December 15, 2007 3:56 PM

Wow. Bitches like this make me ashamed to be a woman. I'd much rather receive a gift card to a bookstore than the self-help books my aunt gets me about how vitamins will Change! Your! Life!

A gift card to a specific store you enjoy says more than a Hell-Mart gift card. The former says, "I don't know enough about which books you're into, so I'm afraid if I bought you one, you might either hate it or already have it, so this way you can buy the book you want most." The latter says, "I have no fucking clue what you want, but there are Wal-Marts everywhere, they have everything, there, I got you something." And for someone like me, gourmet candy is just insulting--everyone in my inner circle knows that candy, in my house, disappears before I even touch it half the time. XD

Posted by: L at December 17, 2007 8:38 PM

My 83 year mother can't get out to shop and is not good on the Internet never forgets special occasions with a gift card and it's always appreciated.

Posted by: mccraw at December 18, 2007 6:54 AM

I have enjoyed this thread, and the referent from Vi, so much... So very fscking much. I, too, was the kid who had to explain to his parents at a very early age that cash was an entirely appropriate gift, and didn't mean that it was a failure of them to invest time in thinking about a present for me, but moreso a recognition of the fact that for this individual (me), cash is the best gift that you could give me. To have money in pocket is a feeling that I don't need to explain to anyone here... ;) Mind you, I do love a good present (plaid skirt, stockings, etc... - but that shows that she knows, accepts and indulges my idiosyncracies, which is the true gift ;), but now that I've grown up, and have a glut of disposable income, I've pretty much bought whatever tech-o-the-day caught my eye... So, any gift given that I really might like, I really might already have... Except an iTouch. But I'm waiting for next gen, so that doesn't count... ;) So, a phone call, a card, hell, an email or SMS just to let me know that you're thinking of me, that's good to go, and I'm grateful for it (even if I don't send thank you cards in an appropriate timeframe ;)

And while I'm on the rant, I have issue with just because it's traditional, that's when you buy gifts... I buy things for people when I see them, and I think that they might like them... Thus, you are much more likely to get an impromptu 'saw this crap and thought you might like it' gift, vice an actual X-mas/Valentine's/ present. I like that better... I usually have multiple boxes to mail to people in various stages of stocking... When I get enough stuff, I send it...

Last comment: Cash is ALWAYS an appropriate present for a college student. Especially grad students.

Posted by: Mack at December 19, 2007 3:41 AM

Now usually reading these articles i find something plausible to them - and that most responses are self righteous shit stacks that teem with the level of angst usually accredited to the teens of the world.

But this.
This, was good.

I mean.
What the FUCK is wrong with gift cards?
This Weston chick seems so self indulgent with the pleasures of her little designer lifestyle that she gets all pissy and goes on a hypocritical verbal rampage that oozes stupidity - when someone gives her a gift she can't automatically cash in at the nearest sentimental shit-facility. I mean, she only seems to be complaining about how she has to put in ANY effort to actually go out and shop for herself.

Sorry lady, Copernicus called, turns out you're NOT the center of the universe after all.

She is a degenerate sour mouth who needs to get her vaginal cavity nailed to a blackboard from the inside.

Then I don't know.
Maybe someone can give her some chocolate dipped strawberries to make her feel better...

Posted by: Stranger at January 1, 2008 10:35 AM

VA sent me...and as a new member of the audience...I was moved, in much the same fashion as a bowel might be, by the sheer arrogance Miz Weston has relegated herself to. I immensely enjoyed Vi's little rant (as I have enjoyed everything I read there) concerning this obviously overly-important woman's view on gift cards...and as one reader above stated, the best gift she could receive would be financial struggle...to that I will add a wish for experiencing all that life can show her...perhaps it will teach the humility she so desperately needs.

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December 10, 2007

Feed issues

For those of you subscribing to the site feeds, no you haven't lost your minds, things did go very screwy during the MT 4 upgrade. I took advantage of that to consolidate things, so the new feed URL is: feed://www.bynkii.com/atom.xml.


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December 9, 2007

A bit of a logical conundrum...

It occurred to me that a great many people say that homosexuality should not have protected status, ala race, sex, religion, because it's a choice. In other words, just as you choose to be gay, you can choose to not be gay.

I disagree, but okay, let's run with that. No federal protection for conditions that are choices. Sex, but not sexual identity. Gender, but not gender preference.

So keeping that in mind, why is religion protected. I mean, it's obviously a choice. There's no "religion gene", right? There's no sequence that spells out "J-E-W", "M-U-S-L-I-M", or "C-H-R-I-S-T-I-A-N". It's a choice, whether by voluntary election, as in the case of the Amish, conversion from another religion, (converted jews, catholics, et al. Heck, Rod Carew, converted Jew.), or familial tradition. But it's not a genetic issue.

I'd say that's obvious even without science backing me up, that a black person can't "convert" to whitey. Surgery, as of yet, can change your appearance, but it cannot change your genetic encoding. So, with that in mind, religion is quite obviously a choice.

A federally-protected, protection enshrined in the Constitution, protected at every possible level, possible more protected than any other single quality a person can have in this county, but nonetheless, a protected choice.

We obviously have no problems granting federal protections to choices, so using that as an excuse is rank hypocrisy. So why is being gay different than being Christian?

I'll give you a hint...it's the same reason that organized religion in this country had a reaction of "tsk-tsk, what are you going to do?" about Fred Phelps when he was only screaming obscene shit at families of dead gay people, but the instant he gored a more popular ox, namely families of dead soldiers, he suddenly became an evil, wicked, nasty man, who should be silenced and shunned.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 22:23 | Permalink


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This is not exactly an accurate analogy.

It is a well established principle in American law that "Freedom of Religion" means freedom of religious _belief_, not freedom of religious _action._ You are only free to act upon your religious beliefs if they are not currently illegal anyway: if your belief extends to what you wear or what time of day you pray, then knock yourself out. But if your belief system includes child sacrifice or paying for sex or taking certain drugs--sorry, you're out of luck. (There is some fuzziness surrounding drug use by Native Americans--but even there the door is closing on drug use.)

If we applied the analogy to homosexuality, then you could be free to believe all you want that homosexuality is good and nice and righteous--belief is protected--but the moment you tried to act, you could get into trouble if someone outlawed it.

Posted by: William Woody at December 10, 2007 11:21 AM

On the other hand, if you think carefully about what John wrote, you'll see he's not talking about pedophilia, but such mundane ideas as zoning and hiring practices, which are actions that affect the public, and are in direct conflict with the general public's wellfare.

In other words, we're not talking about a limited series of actions that are private, but an established body of law that directly affects the general public. So, once again, why should religion be afforded such protections, when it is a clear choice? Would you mind taking a shot at answering THAT question, instead of a strawman?

Posted by: John at December 10, 2007 2:26 PM

"On the other hand, if you think carefully about what John wrote, you'll see he's not talking about pedophilia, but such mundane ideas as zoning and hiring practices, which are actions that affect the public, and are in direct conflict with the general public's wellfare."

Which are also not protected and in fact are being increasingly regulated. Churches are not exempt from zoning laws but depending on the municipality are equally regulated and are required to deal with traffic flow and noise level laws. The Salvation Army has come under fire for its hiring practices as well as several Catholic dioceses, despite both being churches. Other areas have also come under fire as well--including private individuals putting up Christmas decorations that are items of faith (such as a Manger display) on their front lawns in homes that are part of a regulated home owner's association.

"Would you mind taking a shot at answering THAT question, instead of a strawman?"

Again, my point was that in the United States precedence has been firmly established that "freedom of religion" protects freedom of "conscience"--or rather, the freedom to believe as you will. But it does not protect your freedom to act in a way which is contrary to public law. This is not some sort of "strawman argument"; this is established Supreme Court case law.

(To get technical, from my research the primary test here is the so-called "Lemon Test" (from Lemon v Kurtzman), narrowed greatly by Employment Division v Smith--the upshot of it is that if a law has primarily a secular purpose and can be uniformly applied across religious beliefs, then it is constitutional. Labor laws and zoning laws in general meet this test, so they are not considered infringing. Now if a city were to create a special zoning exemption denying a congregation from building on a specific parcel of land, that would be a different matter. But it fails the test because the law targets a specific church and is not a broadly-applicable law.)

Posted by: William Woody at December 10, 2007 4:04 PM

You are only free to act upon your religious beliefs if they are not currently illegal anyway: if your belief extends to what you wear or what time of day you pray, then knock yourself out. But if your belief system includes child sacrifice or paying for sex or taking certain drugs--sorry, you're out of luck. (There is some fuzziness surrounding drug use by Native Americans--but even there the door is closing on drug use.)

So then why hasn't the Catholic Church been busted on providing alcohol to minors? Last I heard, wine is in fact alcohol, and giving it to minors is in fact, illegal in this country.

You also ignore the fact that religious practice is protected as well, for example, protecting the rights of certain christian sects to not recite the pledge, for example. Similar precedent exists for muslims to pray, or sikhs to wear turbans and carry kirpans. The list of legal precedent protecting the expression of religion is long and rich.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 10, 2007 5:42 PM

Which are also not protected and in fact are being increasingly regulated. Churches are not exempt from zoning laws but depending on the municipality are equally regulated and are required to deal with traffic flow and noise level laws. The Salvation Army has come under fire for its hiring practices as well as several Catholic dioceses, despite both being churches. Other areas have also come under fire as well--including private individuals putting up Christmas decorations that are items of faith (such as a Manger display) on their front lawns in homes that are part of a regulated home owner's association.

Actually, "under fire" is a distraction, as, again, legal precedent has protected the rights of religious organizations to not have to take action that is contrary to their central religious tenants. There are exceptions, but by and large, no, the Catholic Church does not have to hire homosexuals, nor do they have to make married men priests, nor do they have to make women priests.

Again, to be clear, "under fire" is not the same as legal precedent, no matter how you wish to spin it.

i'm well aware of the Lemon test, however, that has absolutely nothing to do with my central point:

It is absolutely hypocritical for someone to say they don't support protecting homosexuality from discrimination because it is a choice, yet support protecting freedom of religious belief and action when it too is a choice.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 10, 2007 5:49 PM

"So then why hasn't the Catholic Church been busted on providing alcohol to minors? Last I heard, wine is in fact alcohol, and giving it to minors is in fact, illegal in this country."

That varies from state to state; in some states it is illegal to give children wine even at communion. However, in general, the exemption is for minor amounts of wine (a sip, or a teaspoon) for religious purposes. Further, a parent won't be prosecuted for giving their child small amounts of alcohol (wine, beer, etc) for non-religious services, so long as the parent doesn't actually get the child drunk--though given our nanny state, I wouldn't be surprised if eventually groups start demanding children be taken away from their parents because their child got small amounts of alcohol at a special occasion or at communion.

"You also ignore the fact that religious practice is protected as well, for example, protecting the rights of certain christian sects to not recite the pledge, for example. Similar precedent exists for muslims to pray, or sikhs to wear turbans and carry kirpans. The list of legal precedent protecting the expression of religion is long and rich."

Absolutely, and this fell within the purview of the "Lemon" test I cited above. That test was significantly narrowed in the 1990's, which means it's somewhat doubtful that many of these exceptions would survive another court challenge. (The original test was that if such a law was relatively minor but had a major impact on the practice of a given religion, an exemption could be punched through the law for that group. This allowed Christian Scientists to be exempt from getting medical help for their children, for example, or allowed Sikhs to wear a weapon. After the 1990 ruling, however, the emphasis was changed, and the exception granted the Christian Scientists against seeking medical help has been under significant fire--up to and including child welfare taking children away from Christian Scientists.)

The laws providing for certain sects to not recite a pledge or (more interestingly) to allow an individual to claim to be a "conscientious objector" during military service may have been spearheaded by certain religious sects, but those provisions apply to everyone. You don't have to be a Quaker to claim to be a "conscientious objector" in the military, even though it was the Quakers who spearheaded that designation.

"It is absolutely hypocritical for someone to say they don't support protecting homosexuality from discrimination because it is a choice, yet support protecting freedom of religious belief and action when it too is a choice."

I understand that is your point, and it is an interesting one. Further, for most of the religious right who hasn't given two clock cycles to thinking about what they are demanding verses what they are opposing, I think it's a good point.

However, even though Freedom of Religion is enshrined in the First Amendment while homosexuality is not, even the fact that Freedom of Religion is enshrined does not fully protect action--which is my point.

I wouldn't want to see a world where homosexuality is treated the same as freedom of religion: in such a world I could see people saying "well, that's fine that you want to believe in homosexuality, but the laws against male on male sex stand because there is a public need to prevent the spread of AIDS." And if we applied the currently interpreted Lemon test against such an anti-male on male sex law, the problem is it could pass constitutional muster. Certainly anti-sodomy laws (which were designed to prevent homosexuality) have constantly passed constitutional muster: it has required movements from the ground up to get them removed from the books--the courts have certainly allowed them to stand.

In other words, to my mind, homosexuals require full freedom (within the same limits currently set for hetrosexuals, such as current nudity laws) to be able to act without being harassed in any way--which is far more than religion should enjoy. Meaning I think it's far more acceptable to allow "damned Muslims" to pass through my lips after seeing a terrorist bombing than it is to allow "damned faggots" to pass through my lips when I see two guys walking hand in hand down the street.

Posted by: William Woody at December 11, 2007 11:34 AM

Wow. Adding AIDS and sodomy to shore up the wicker man analogy. And as a bonus, relativist justification of racism! It's morning in America again!

Damned Christians.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 11, 2007 4:16 PM

Certainly anti-sodomy laws (which were designed to prevent homosexuality) have constantly passed constitutional muster: it has required movements from the ground up to get them removed from the books--the courts have certainly allowed them to stand.

Actually, at the Supreme Court level, they tend to do rather poorly, even with nimrods like Scalia who never met a government law limiting the rights of the individual he didn't like.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 12, 2007 7:16 AM

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December 7, 2007

Proof there is no god

Because if there were, this statement from Mitt Romney would require lightning:

Romney said religion is essential to freedom, without pointing to any specific faith.

"Freedom requires religion, just as religion requires freedom. Freedom opens the windows of the soul so that man can discover his most profound beliefs and commune with God. Freedom and religion endure together, or perish alone," the GOP contender said.

BAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH!

Freedom requires Religion?

AAAHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHahAH

Oh the stupid, she makes me laugh again.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 13:12 | Permalink


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Hallelujah brother!

Posted by: Improbus at December 8, 2007 7:56 AM

Well, religion doesn't require freedom. But freedom requires the ability to worship. Otherwise, not so free.

Posted by: Pike at December 9, 2007 9:33 PM

Freedom also requires the ability to speak your mind, but that is NOT the same as "Freedom requires profanity".

Freedom does not require a specific implementation of a right. What it requires is that the government stays the hell out of your religion, or lack thereof. No putting god on money like we did in the late 1800's or 1950s 'cause we're afraid someone ELSE might think we're godless heathens. No sneaking it into the pledge because we're twitchy about the commies. The only time the gov. gets involved in religion is to say they have no comment, and to prevent someone else from using religion to beat someone else down in this country. That's really about it.

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 9, 2007 10:08 PM

Yeah!! And who does that bastard John Adams think he his to say that the constitution was written for the religious?
'We have no government armed with power capable of contending with human passions unbridled by morality and religion... Our constitution was made for a moral and religious people.'

Clearly this SOB doesn't understand the principles that founded this nation!

- From the Ravings of the Psychomancer

Posted by: Psychomancer at December 13, 2007 12:19 AM

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December 5, 2007

Yes I know...

...that some of the formatting in the SNMP article is fugly as good as it's going to get. I'll have to replace it I've replaced the particularly ugly parts with screencaps...ugh. Stupid HTML.
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Formatting aside, has anyone ever approached you to write smaller books of the kind Tidbits and Macworld publish?

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 5, 2007 9:32 AM

Not as such. I don't think there's a market for "Take Control of SNMP on Mac OS X"

Posted by: John C. Welch at December 5, 2007 2:55 PM

Heh. I have a feeling that, if I knew the significance of SNMP, I'd be Rolling On The Floor, Laughing My Acronymic Ass Off.

I hate the fact that the proprietary typesetting software of the 1970s soured me on code-related issues.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at December 5, 2007 10:03 PM

yes, YOU TOO can get all this theory applied to your brain at Macworld Expo's MacIT conference. ;)

We'll sell you the whole seat, but you'll ONLY NEED THE EDGE!

--chuck
http://chuck.goolsbee.org

Posted by: chuck goolsbee at December 6, 2007 1:08 AM

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December 4, 2007

Oh come on now...

There is no way in hell that they're keeping Sherri Shepherd around for any reason other than to show how funny stupid is, and that's just mean:

Actually, I don't believe anyone can be on television, not continuously digging in random orifices, and be THAT STUPID.


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November 28, 2007

Hmm...it appears to have worked

Looks like the site is running okay on MT 4.

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November 27, 2007

I hate upgradeing

There's nothing like following the instructions for an upgrade, and still having it fail.

MovableType 4, you RULE


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November 26, 2007

Sing it Brother Harlan, Sing it!

It's not just writers here. Artists too. Programmers. Designers. if it's worth asking someone with skills you don't have, to do for you, then it's worth paying them for.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 14:21 | Permalink


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I love Harlan, and I always have. I've read two teleplays and two dozen books by the man, both fiction and nonfiction. Got a book signed by him in 1980 at the Boston Worldcon, and had to pointedly thank him while he was gabbing with someone else, absent-mindedly scribbling on the bookplate which would eventually get attached to my copy of "Shatterday."

The guy's not someone I'll ever need to hang with, I think. He occasionally comes off as a contentious jerk, and is probably a difficult man to be a friend to. But that's okay, because all I need from him is his writing and his clarity.

Mr. W., you fit right in his category. Except I wouldn't turn down an opportunity to buy you a drink.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 26, 2007 7:47 PM

Strange thing - my comment vanished. Poof. Gone. I choose to believe there's some upgrade gremlin that took it, 'cause to my knowledge I have not pissed off anyone other than Jack on this blog. I guess it's possible, John, that you've confused me with some other Fred that went over the line in the past? I can't believe my fairly innocuous comment about an ironic situation here would have been cause for removal.

Anyway, let me know and I'll either back off or re-post.

Posted by: Fred at November 28, 2007 2:44 AM

"John's stupidity with deleting comment spam" would be the answer to that question Fred.

;-)

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 28, 2007 2:20 PM

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November 25, 2007

Thoughts on the Kindle and e-readers

First, this isn't a review of the Kindle. That would require me to have one, and honestly, I don't care enough about one to even try to get a review copy. Of the Kindle itself, I'd have to say, it looks awkward, the design seems rather biased against lefties, and it's yet another piece of technozoomdweebie gear to carry around.

I got into smartphones years and years ago to get away from carrying multiple single-purpose gadgets. The idea of one that's taller and wider than any paperback I've ever carried, and weighs 5/8 of a pound has utterly no appeal to me. Really.

The idea that it will replace books is laughable on multiple levels. For one, 90% of my reading is on a plane. I can read a book on a plane from taxi to taxi, and the only interruption is the safety lecture. With a Kindle, you can't read from taxi to 10K feet, and during final approach. If I don't want to keep a book, I can leave it in a coffee shop. I'm only out a couple of bucks, and I've maybe made someone else's day. Sweet. With a Kindle? It's a damned albatross. Too big to shove in a pocket, too expensive to not worry about, just heavy enough to be annoying, and I'm not seeing anything in it that says "walk down the street and read me".

Yes, I read while walking. I'm good at it. I've got some awesome radar that lets me be deep into a book and register traffic, people, street signs, you name it. I've got an internal inertial nav system that's got to be seen to be believed. No one, and I mean, no one, is going to roll me for the latest Clive Cussler or "Destroyer". Really. But something electronic and shiny? That'll buy a rock or two. No thanks. I have enough overpriced electronic shit I have to worry about.

The other major problem with replacing books is that there isn't an online store that you want to browse the way you will a book store. Jeff Bezos can hump his Kindle until it's as sticky as a stripper's shoes, but you don't browse Amazon, not really. You might link-hop a bit, but face it, Amazon's strength is that it lets you get shit done like a SEAL sniper. You find your target, take the shot, and get out. That's not bad, not on any level. It's one reason why I use, no why I love Amazon so much for buying gifts and the like. They have a lot of stuff, it's easy to find, and it's usually pretty cheap. It's also really easy to get through the whole "trading money for stuff" part of the transaction.

But when I go into a bookstore, it's with the knowledge that I'm going to have hours to kill. I wander. Every section, (okay, not the romance novels. If I want porn, I just get it off the internet, not bodice-rippers), looking at covers, thumbing through ones that look interesting. I don't have a goal in mind. I want something to jump off the shelves at me. Maybe it's a magazine with an interesting article about the sinking of the Scorpion. Maybe it's a study of Keith Richards' guitar licks, or a history of the CIA. I go to book stores because I don't know what I want, and I want some random "a-ha" mojo to smack me in the head and make me take it home. I find most of my best books that way. Basically, I want some random author to run up and cerebrally bugger me. I'll smile and ask for more.

In a book store, I'm rather adventurous. Online? Not so much. Online, I'm going to get stuff I already know I want. Amazon is perfect for that. Low-hassle and convenient.

You aren't going to browse on a Kindle. Oh you can come as close as Amazon lets you, but in the end, you aren't browsing even remotely close to how you will in a real, honest-to-god book store. Besides, I adore used book stores, and Amazon sucks ass compared to that, 'cause Amazon ain't got no trade in lovin'.

That's not to say I think the Kindle will be a flop. Well, they need to fix that fucked-up design, make that thing about 12.5% of it's current cost, kill that stupid DRM shit, and make it fit in my damned pocket better. But there is a market for the Kindle, even outside of the technophile dingalings like Le Scoble or Winer, who cream their underoos every time someone hands them a new technotoy. (Please, for the love of humanity, don't show Sta-Puff 2.0 or Capt. Gouda the level of computerization in sex toys. Even if they could write worth a crap, the idea of either one of them even knowing what a sex toy is makes me vomit in my mouth a lot.)

The Kindle, while utterly horrid for replacing books, is fantastic for replacing dead trees in what I call "disposable reading", aka newspapers and magazines. (You'll note I've left off blogs. That's deliberate. I still pretty much hate the New Media Douchebags who are, mostly due to mass stupidity, and ease of manipulation, the "A-list" of the "blogodorkosphere". There are about six "blogs" worth reading. This one ain't one of them. Daring Fireball is. Other than those few, stop reading blogs with shitty writing. It rots your mind.)

Face it, you don't keep newspapers unless something truly important happened that day. You don't keep magazines except for the same reason, or they're National Geographic. You get the paper, read it, maybe do the puzzles, then chuck them, or leave them for someone else. You get Time, you read it, you dump it. They're disposable. Completely forgettable once the next edition comes. For this? The Kindle is brilliant. However, this brings to mind some form issues and a marketing plan that looks like they found the one for the Segway, and substituted "Kindle" for "Segway" throughout the document. Repeating the dumb doesn't make it smart. It just makes it refined dumb.

First, stop obsessing about portability, and think about more ways for ease of use to make the Kindle v.X better for disposable reading. For example, do the deal with Starbucks, Panera, Indie Coffee shops to build Kindles into the tables. Dump the keyboard and go for gorgeous screens. Don't worry about battery life, and instead make them AC power only, and stupid easy to maintain. Go for an iPhone-style screen that can be cleaned with Windex and a paper towel, but one that's 8.5"x11", and at an initial cost to the shop of about fifty bucks a unit. Don't stop there. Waiting rooms cry out for Kindles, and would be a willing audience for them. Who here loves medical waiting rooms? Love them old magazines and big pharma ads? Yeah? No? Thought not.

Airports are another great place for Kindle v.2. Large amounts of people waiting in predictable places, wanting something to make the time go faster. What better place for an unlimited amount of reading? Ads won't be a problem here, we have ads in papers, magazines, and TV news now. For once, you have an audience that won't mind ads. Sweet!

For the portable versions...honestly, pick something to focus on in v.2. In this case, the reading experience. Leave the file upload stuff alone. Concentrate on making it as pleasurable to read as possible. Jack the res higher. Much higher. iPhone-and-then-some higher. Make it smaller. Actually, make it fold. And get rid of the friggin' keyboard, there's far too many ways to get around that silliness, and we all know it, especially when you're talking about a lamer keyboard like on the Kindle v.1. That's just some cowardly nod to whiners for whom the lack of a keyboard somehow equates to being useless. They suck, and their opinion is not only stupid, but proven wrong. They need to get over it. There's nothing about reading that requires a keyboard.

Also, sponsor recharging stations. Along with the static mounts in airports, coffee shops, what have you, have inductive recharging stations. Lay the Kindle down, pick up a charge while you read.

Finally, drop the fucking DRM. That shit doesn't work. It's never worked, and it never will. It's absolutely stupid that even v.1 came with it. If there were publishers that wouldn't play without it, Bezos should have flipped them the finger and let them sit on the outside looking in. So what if I buy a book and want to move it onto someone else's. Why should that cost anyone anything. Note...move, not copy. It's worked for books for oh...centuries. I think that's a good model. No lamer "you can only loan it for n days" shite either. I want to turn a friend onto a magazine article I think they'd like, I just make with the tappity-tappy, and bang, they've got mail. Sure, it cost me a couple bucks, but how do you think I let them read the latest cool article in my copy of Time now? Same way. Again, just in case you didn't get it: DRM is for idiots who think that they're smarter than every other person on the planet. Or Ballmer. Which is the same thing, when you think about it.

If it seems I'm advocating an infrastructure as much as the device, well, I am. Look, e-readers have by and large failed like cost-cutting on the Titanic, because they're all enclosed worlds. You can't do anything with them but read stuff you either send yourself, or download yourself. What's up with that? Lame. Why not let indie bookstores have Kindles and Kindle stations where they can offer up their own downloads for customers of stuff they think is cool? Same thing for libraries? Hell, libraries could make all kinds of cool uses out of this damned thing, and face it, they're on board bigtime if it increases reading and patronage. Why ignore a built-in fanbase? if you get out of the mindset that created Kindle v.1, you have a real potential to create the next...fuckit, the first next big thing. Screw following everyone else's example, do it different, and do it right.

But that's going to involve some risk-taking, and some looking ahead beyond the next quarter, or the next mastubatory outflow of the technophiles. Because if you sell it to technophiles, it's doomed. Who does Apple sell to? Not the technophiles. Who is the Wii aimed at? Not the technophiles. Technophiles are like baby birds. They're cute, until you realize that what they really are are a bunch of small, loud, brainless nincompoops who spend all day sitting in their own shit, waiting to be fed by the momma bird, and don't even realize they're getting nothing but ABC worms in the form of warmed-over vomit.

Again...don't listen to the Technorati Circle Jerk Crowd. They're all short-sited dingalings who think the entire world is going to get better because of HDTV and blogging. They're stupid. Design Kindle for people who read newspapers and magazines. Who want to sit down and enjoy every aspect of reading. Fuckit, figure out a way to turn a damned page by dragging your hand across the screen, instead of this next/back button bullshit. Make this thing cool to people in a diner in Des Moines and a southern restaurant in Binghampton. Make it something that Our Lord of the Bad Haircut Megachurch in Arkansas wants to put in all the pews. (Face it, the religious market are sheep by design and intent. You get some fundie megachurches putting this in, and the money will flow like rain in a hurricane man.) If the technophiles whine, give them a USB key and some bullshit speech with the words "new media" and "community building" in it. They'll be so into the afterglow that it won't occur to them that you're ignoring them. Look at the set of people who aren't inane technophiles compared to the set that is. Which one's bigger? Yeah, thought so, and face it, we're talking about Amazon. Even the computer illiterate know what Amazon is. That's a hell of a lead. If you don't fuck it up.

The Kindle has some real potential. The question however, is this: Does Bezos want to just be better than existing e-readers, or does he actually want to change the world?


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Posted by John C. Welch at 00:18 | Permalink


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Bezos is a very capable numbers guy, but his organization is apparently very short on design strength.

The layout of this gizmo looks like it'd be uncomfortable to handle and inconvenient to use, but as the Kings mentioned on YML, it might be very useful to students, if it could somehow provide a function that's as convenient and accessible as a highlighter and notes scribbled in the margins.

I like the idea of this thing being tailored to institutions before individuals.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 25, 2007 1:14 AM

The problem with the student idea is...why? If you're giving students laptops, then wtf do they need the Kindle for? Just have them download the books as PDFs onto their laptops. They'll have a superior UI, bigger and better screen, more useful capabilities and a better keyboard.

If they aren't, then making them get a Kindle won't mean they don't need a laptop. The Kindle is really a monologue, with some basic annotation features so you can get to the bits you liked. That's not really useful for students. Then need more dialogue than that, even with a book. Unless you're talking about a library or library - like situation, I don't see how a Kindle is going to be that useful.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 25, 2007 2:10 AM

"hump his Kindle until it's as sticky as a stripper's shoes", "If I want porn, I just get it off the internet, not bodice-rippers", "cerebrally bugger me", "computerization in sex toys", "Technorati Circle Jerk Crowd"...

John, I think you need to go and have a nice lie down, or at least try adding some bromide to your beverages!

I thought I'd accidentally surfed to a Playboy blog :)

As to the content, I agree almost 100%; maybe a 95%. I think you are missing another instance where an e-book reader makes sense: for keeping all those PDF instruction manuals and computer manuals within easy reach, so I don't have to have multiple screens on the go, one for my code and the other for the reference. Even with a laptop open for coding, I can still see a use for a second device for annotated PDFs that is stand-alone, so I can take my whole reference library with me even when I don't have my laptop.

When we get an iPhone-styled device, about A5 in size, with unrestricted access and faithful reproduction of any PDF file I care to load onto it, I'll be buying. Make it a web-browser for the sofa, and maybe a VNC client to my desktop via wi-fi, so much the better. (Anyone else thing this is what we'll see from Apple in Jan? An iPhone in a larger form-factor that does exactly what I describe, and will kill Kindle before it starts?)

But yes, I have no inclination to read fiction on one of these devices, as I have no requirement to carry 100's of novels at any one time. If I'm reading a book, why would I need any others? I find it hard enough following plot without changing book-to-book mid-read!

Plus, the only time I get a lot of fiction reading is by the pool on holiday, or when I'm undergoing Oxygen Therapy for my MS, where you can't even take electronic devices into the tank...

In those instances, a paperback is ideal.

I get the impression that all of these devices are working back from e-ink, DRM and technology, rather than from an actual use case. I'm hopeful that someone like Mr. Jobs will show them how it should be done, and create the next big consumer device.

Posted by: Andy W at November 25, 2007 9:11 AM

> There are about six "blogs" worth reading. This one ain't one of
> them. Daring Fireball is. Other than those few, stop reading blogs
> with shitty writing. It rots your mind.

Please tell me you're talking about technology focused blogs, eh? 'Cause there are a _lot_ more talented writers out on the 'tubes then you apparently give credit to.

You gonna tell me that Glenn Greenwald is a shitty writer? You got a problem with Digby's prose?

Perhaps emptywheel is too wordy for you, or her research is too in-depth? How about Marty Lederman? Or Carpetbagger? Does Matthew Yglesias make your top six? Tbogg? Roy at alicublog? How about John Cole (his current writing, not while he was blinded by the right)? Larry Johnson? The Editors? Josh Marshall has a blog; is he worth reading? Boo Man? William Gibson posts every week, about as often as you do; should I pass up on his Atom feed? Kevin Drum? Athenae? Holden Caulfield? scout prime? Thers? And I haven't even mentioned any of the diarists on Kos, such as BarbinMD or DemFromCT or SusanG. James Fallows posts about once a day, yet I don't feel a loss of brain cells from reading his shitty writing online, any more then I did when I used to read him in print.

The internets don't begin and end with Gruber and his mysterious five friends.

I for one would put access to all these marvelous writers high on the list of what I want my wiz bang gizmos to give me. And that would mean smart feed access, like NetNewsWire, something tuned for content.

Posted by: David at November 25, 2007 2:11 PM

>For one, 90% of my reading is on a plane. I can >read a book on a plane from taxi to taxi, and the >only interruption is the safety lecture.

You listen to the safety lecture?

Posted by: Dave Provine at November 25, 2007 6:51 PM

I'm really embarrassed. Of course students with laptops wouldn't need one of these very much. Shows you what era I was schooled in. Personal computers were a bit thinner on the ground when I graduated in 1982. But oh, that TRS-80 Model III.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 25, 2007 8:05 PM

Dave, I worked aircraft maintenance for many years. I *always* listen to the safety lecture and follow along with the cards. If nothing else, it's the best time to really lock the flight attendant's faces in memory.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 25, 2007 11:58 PM

Death to books! (just joking) I'm just tired of what a PITA it is to store media. Sure, we've slimmed down recently (thanks iPod!) the ungodly hoards of CDs, records, cassettes, 8-tracks, laser discs, reel-to-reels, VHS tapes, Betamax tapes, tapes for the video camera, rolls of film/negatives, and all of the freakin' furniture(?!) you needed to store them.

The last step in our media diet is print. I don't know what the answer is, but for the love of God, will someone (anyone) please help us get rid of the constant need to purchase book cases!? When you need furniture to store media, life sucks.

I don't buy the argument about the tangible "fun" of books and their supposed ease-of-use. They take up space (lots of it in my house). They weigh a ton. They get dusty as sin. Pages discolor fairly rapidly. And half the books people collect on shelves are never read a second time. And I'm not even mentioning any of the eco-issues involved with the constant onslaught of printed materials. Stop the insanity!

I do like that you focused nicely on the role newspapers and magazines play in our death by media burial.

Posted by: Ricket at November 26, 2007 1:46 AM

Actually Ricket, I was leaving off quite a few issues with ebook readers. For one, without color, you lose things like covers, artwork, and the like. Time magazine on a Kindle is going to suck, because the photos will suck.

The room for storing books is countered by "how do you figure out which memory card has what on it?". There's inconveniences with both, however, the tactile advantages of books, and the complete suck that Amazon brings to browsing and the "aha" experience, not to mention the inability of the Kindle to even allow you to treat e-books as you do a real book is real.

If you treat books as disposable as magazines, there's already a solution for you that is infinitely cheaper than a Kindle: The Library.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 26, 2007 12:04 PM

John, those are fair arguments. Of course, I haven't seen an e-Reader that will take the place of a book. I just want one that could. Books seem awfully wasteful, even though we're used to them culturally.

Maybe the "which memory" card problem would be easily solved by the network? I'm not so upset about searching for my media (like you would in a traditional library). I just hate that it takes up so much space in my house. Ugh.

Remember the old stereos in the 70's that were built into waist-high giant wooden cabinets (speakers and all)? Or what about the behemoth wooden contraptions that people call "entertainment centers" where you'd store your TV, stereo components, CD, albums, tapes, VHS, etc. That's how I see bookcases.

Now the "hi-fi" and all of its associated media fits in your back pocket. You can watch video in the palm of your hand, on your lap, or via a big picture box hanging on the the wall (flat screens) - again with media furniture being eliminated, or nearly so.

It's time for print media to do the same thing. I don't have any answers, just complaints, however. :-)

Posted by: Ricket at November 28, 2007 2:04 AM

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November 22, 2007

New Technorati Tag!

I liked this video so much, it's now my new favorite Technorati Tag: New Media Douchebag.

Think of the time I'll save with this handy, flexible tag, that applies to so many people!


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Posted by John C. Welch at 00:34 | Permalink


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November 20, 2007

I don't usually disagree with the Macalope

But when the horned one says:

And perhaps the horny one said it best when he said "The writings of Robert Scoble are like a thousand monkeys typing, short about 999 monkeys."
I simply must disagree, as it's incorrect, and insults the monkey.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 17:33 | Permalink


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The best part of the article was when he compared fantasies of Mac OS licensing with letters to Penthouse Forum.

Posted by: Shawn Levasseur at November 21, 2007 12:29 AM

Maybe insert the word "stoned" somewhere in there.

Posted by: Steven Fisher at November 21, 2007 1:35 AM

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November 18, 2007

Blogs that aren't inane tech sites

So when blogmeisters like Scoble and Winer talk about the "power of the Blogosphere", you do know what they're talking about, right? 90% tech circle-jerking, 9% politics, and a wee bit of personal babble. For all their blathering about the power of the "blogosphere", they don't talk about anything about that inane circle-jerk tech bubble they live in.

Great...more geeks talking about geeks. I can feel the world becoming a better place already.


NOT

That's not to say there aren't blogs or groups of blogs trying to do more than bitch about technoshite and how mean commenters are. It's just that if you use Technorati and the rest to find blogs, all you're going to find is the same shite that Scoble and Winer link to.

Luckily, you read this site, so here, let me link you to some sites that might actually teach you something beyond how to make your tech-dick bigger and harder:


A plethora of blogs, none of them will ever appear on Technorati, some of them make my head hurt when they get down and dirty. (ERV and pals going deep into evolution of various HIV virii...owww...but SO cool.)

The only reason blogs have been taken over by Scoble, Winer, et al is because people have allowed them to be. There's far more out there than that technobubble bullshit, no matter what the rating sites tell you.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 15:40 | Permalink


Comments

I used to have a feed to Bad Astronomy.... deleted it a few months back. Seems it no longer posted much about Science and/or Atronomy. Got way too political. Not snark, political.

Bitchy even, Was that about the time it started caring about how many Diggs it got? Damn, could be.

Posted by: DaveD at November 18, 2007 7:02 PM

I love Preshrunk

http://preshrunk.org/

all it is is about tshirts

Posted by: tom at November 18, 2007 8:12 PM

You have no idea ;)

Im holding a grenade right now, and its either going to demolish the Discovery Institute, or its a dud. We will see in a few weeks. hehehehehehehe!

[/cryptic post]

Posted by: ERV at November 18, 2007 9:46 PM

Oooh...I cannot wait ERV, I cannot wait. Between you continously beating Behe like a baby seal, and Orac forcing the truth to come out on the Chad Jessop thing, I am *enthralled*.

This is better than even really horrid reality TV...because it's real, but not real stupid.

OOOhhh...next plot for a reality show..."Ten Scientists...Ten ID'ers, Ten Doctors, and Ten Homeopaths....Forty go in...one comes out"

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 18, 2007 11:19 PM

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November 17, 2007

So many nimrods, so few tasers

I swear, it's like the universe is trying to turn me into the "Taseinator" or something, and they've hired Gruber to be my personal trainer. Once again, thanks to Daring Fireball for the targeting assistance.

Robert Scoble is having a full-blown "Where's my fucking latte, it's been 30 seconds", overprivileged yuppie larvae, princess two-step fit because his Macbook is kernel panicking on boot. He ran an upgrade, and now it's going nuts. Of course, this is not the real problem. Sure, kernel panics after upgrades suck ass, but there's a clear and reliable method for taking care of them. This isn't really about that. This bitchfit has nothing to do with his Macbook. Robert knows more geeks per square inch than anyone. He knows that all he has to do is get on Twitter and and say "OMG, MY MACBOOK IS SICK, HELP ME MAKE IT BETTER", and there will be a miles-long line of free support practically killing each other for the privilege of fixing the Scoblebook.

No, it is not computer problems that are the cause of Le Scoble's tears and chest-hitching dramatic proclamations. The cause is something far worse. It is something that is so awful, so wrong that I hesitate to mention it. Apple has committed the ultimate sin, taken the unmentionable action, done something so callous, so evil, so unbelievably wrong that I urge those of you with delicate constitutions to please, for the love of $DEITY$, find another site to read.

For those brave souls who rush in where angels fear to tread, for those Daniels who will brave the lion's den, for you, my gallant brigade, for you, there is only the horror of Apple's crime against humanity, nay against the very universe itself:

Apple isn't kissing Scoble's ass

Quick man, can't you see it was too much for him? Fetch the smelling salts and my scotch. You, out of that chair, the lad needs to sit and recover his constitution!

That's right. Apple PR has gone and once again, refused to join the rest of the tech community in rimming Le Scoble. Hell, they won't even give him a kiss on the cheek. I know, it's such an improbable idea, that the mind beggars even to suggest it as a flight of fancy, but look, read Le Scoble's own words:

What’s ironic is lots of other computer companies would LOVE to give me free stuff (I don’t take it) but Apple is the only company that’s never raised a PR finger to help me. Instead I feel so honored to spend my money on this crap. Why? Just to have a shiny machine?
I know how shocking this is to all of you. I myself was initially unable to read that paragraph without a terrible attack of the vapors.

Okay, enough, this level of sarcasm is starting to make my bowels cramp. Just how out of touch do you have to be to start acting like you have the right to special treatment. What level of entitlement do you have to possess to think this way? Make no mistake, that's what this is: the pouting of the biggest, most spoiled entitlement queen in the "blogosphere". This is what happens when you start thinking of yourself as better than everyone else. This great swollen ego is what happens when you start believing the sycophants who tell you that your shit really doesn't stink, and that anyone telling you different is just a "hater".

It's bullshit and it shows his moral posturing, (I don't take free stuff), to be utter hypocrisy. He's every bit as bad as those he infers lack trustability for the crime of taking free stuff. Sure, he doesn't take free stuff. But if you don't kiss Scobleizer ass, then you gets what you gets. Fight the bull, you get the horns. (insert inane "horns" hand gesture here)

Someone tell me how demanding that you be treated as better than everyone else is more moral than taking review copies of stuff? Because i'm not seeing it.

For the record, yeah, I get free stuff. I get a lot of it. I don't do a lot of reviews, not in the usual sense, but I get review copies of software on a regular basis. What I get more of are free copies of things I beta test. I'd rather do it the beta test way, because then the company gets my feedback in time to maybe fix some things. At least that's the theory. Besides, I prefer seeing a product get released and knowing that I had something to do with it. Or as George Marshall said:

There is no limit to the good you can do if you don't care who gets the credit.

But I never, for a minute, think I'm better than anyone else with a web site, or writing for a magazine. I'm not one tenth the writer that Gruber or Ihnatko are. I can't program to save my life compared to Dori Smith, Daniel Jalkut, or Michael Tsai. I've never come close to putting together a community the way Rob Griffiths has. No matter where you look on the Mac web, or the tech web, you will find better, smarter, more well-spoken people than me. If I have one advantage, it's that I can type fast, and read faster, and I'm a decent sysadmin.

Any time someone asks me to review software, or to write an article for their site, I feel privileged. I may hate the product, and the fact I got a free copy of a turd won't make it any less of a turd, but if I get that consideration, I feel lucky. I don't like asking for free stuff, it always feels so presumptuous.

The idea of pulling a Scoble, and calling a company out for not fellating my ego? Dear god, I hope I've never even come close, and if it ever appears that I have, then it was either unintentional, or the stupid made me do it, and I apologize.

I will say that if Apple is bound and determined to shit on Scoble's ego parade that way, then there's only option left for me:To buy as much Apple stuff as I can possibly afford.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 19:59 | Permalink


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Amen brother, can I get a witness? My only conundrum with Scoble is this; how can a person so self absorbed and full of hubris look like this?

Posted by: Patrick at November 17, 2007 8:35 PM

Surely, you must be exaggurating. Scoble probably was only mentioning Apple's PR practices in passing...

[clicks on link... reads Scoble's post...]

Oh crap. He WAS that bad.

Two kernel panics, and his next impulse isn't to boot from an install disk or a backup, but to lash out at Apple and, irrationally enough, its P.R. department.

Compare with Jeff Jarvis' infamous "Dell Hell" posts which was all about his experience with Dell's tech support and repair services.

(http://www.buzzmachine.com/archives/cat_dell.html)

Jeff talked about his experience from the perspective of a customer. He never played the "I'm a member of the press" card, or the "I'm an important blogger" card. He only played the "I paid for this extended service contract" card.

He still caught flack from some people who thought he was trying to get special treatment from them. Which why I was about to give Scoble the benefit of the doubt, until his own words removed all doubt.

Posted by: Shawn Levasseur at November 17, 2007 9:04 PM

That Scoble guy sure is amusing. Always good for getting himself in the 'news'.

And I'm sure that Apple would kiss whichever body parts he wanted kissed if he had something to offer for them. But I guess it's much more profitable for them to suck up to the 'journalists' writing for actual Journals.

Posted by: ssp at November 17, 2007 9:11 PM

John,

The bitter irony here is that Scoble is whining about not getting free stuff. He should have bought AppleCare, and presumably didn't. That gets you better treatment, although it doesn't guarantee anything. So does paying http://www.apple.com/support/products/payperincident.html for a support incident ($49 for a personal Mac, and calling through this channel should raise the response level, even if it is or should be covered through warranty -- but perhaps he has bad third-party RAM -- we don't know). PodTech.net could purchase an AppleCare Help Desk Support http://www.apple.com/support/products/helpdesk.html contract.

So Apple premium support isn't a tangible item that comes in a box (actually it comes on paper). Demanding that Apple give you premium support which you haven't paid for is, despite the denials, demanding free 'stuff'.

I want to know how immature it is for a "thought leader" blogger to resort to "Screw you. Screw you. Screw you." in the most public and visible way he can manage for a support issue. You say that under your breath, or you curse loudly at home. Broadcasting it on a blog is an attack, which was the idea of this whole post.

Here we go:

What’s ironic is lots of other computer companies would LOVE to give me free stuff (I don’t take it) but Apple is the only company that’s never raised a PR finger to help me. Instead I feel so honored to spend my money on this crap. Why? Just to have a shiny machine?

So he's not really complaining about Apple Support (the ones responsible for dealing with this problem), but about Apple PR, the ones responsible for keeping "important" people happy -- this syncs up with the public ranting, above.

Posted by: Chris Pepper at November 17, 2007 9:22 PM

Damn... well said.

Generally I take Scoble with a grain of salt, but his little fit really did get under my skin. How can someone who spends so much time around computers not know that whatever happens with his particular shit is in no way representative of the company/brand/people, etc?

He can't. He does know. And you nailed it on the head - he's whining to glorify himself and, ideally, to get Apple to kiss his ass some.

I think you really nailed the proper attitude to have regarding all this as well, and personally, I appreciate it. When I was doing this blogging thing marginally successfully I always felt the same way - and I think that's really the way to be. Nothing soils a person worse than an overwrought sense of entitlement...

Posted by: Gideon at November 17, 2007 9:32 PM

Even more sad irony: Scoble writes a lot of posts about having interviewed people whom he says are a lot smarter than he is. Likes to mention how much he learned from a particular interview.

I'd guess he's being very selective about what he retains. I'll also bet his hits are up. Mission accomplished?

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 18, 2007 12:57 AM

Maurice:

BINGO...Scoble plays the "I'm just a big doof", but it's all bullshit in the end. If you read his shit long enough, and I don't recommend it, you realize there's a very specific cycle to it. Slam apple, praise apple, kiss some blogger ass, whine about bloggers, and on a regular basis, you'll see him cry about "mean comments", and how he's not going to take it anymore.

He'll also use major personal events for SERIOUS hit fodder, like when his mom died, he said he was going to be offline to deal with it, then posted like a motherfucker, with a large amount of it being about the quality of Verizon EVDO cards. His post rate didn't fucking blip. Then, when some poor pr schmuck calls him, he REAMS them for not "OMG" reading his blog and realizing he was in the midst of a tragedy. When I pointed out that reading his blog would not have prevented this, since he was posting like a motherfucker all throughout it, oh.my.god, was I just the devil incarnate? Hell yeah.

Whatever. he's really nice in person, and if you can get him to stop being Le Scoble, and start being Robert, he's an interesting guy. But Le Scoble? Whiny bitch fucktard persona to the max.

But then again, his livelihood requires him to be in the public eye, or rather the "blogger eye" constantly, so he kind of has to set aside any consideration other than attracting attention to himself.

He'll probably be at macworld this year, and oh, won't that be fucking surreal.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 18, 2007 1:13 AM

So if Apple has to give him free stuff every time he has a kernel panic, that means Microsoft must give him free stuff every time he gets the Blue Screen of Death. So the question in my mind is: why doesn't he own the world by now?

Posted by: Arvid at November 18, 2007 1:18 AM

John, thanks for adding some balance to yet another episode of Scoble's foolishness. And thanks for bringing some humility to the situation, something we see enough of in the blogosphere.

It would be fine if Robert comes to Macworld, but if Le Scoble, shows up, it won't be pretty...

Posted by: Al Willis at November 18, 2007 2:39 AM

"He should have bought AppleCare, and presumably didn't. That gets you better treatment, although it doesn't guarantee anything."

Mmm, now that sounds like a GREAT deal! So I pay several hundred pounds in order to MAYBE get some extra help on the whim of Apple... yeah, uh huh, I'll have some of that... :)

Chris, a word of advice: never become a salesman ;)

"Whatever. he's really nice in person, and if you can get him to stop being Le Scoble, and start being Robert, he's an interesting guy. But Le Scoble? Whiny bitch fucktard persona to the max."

Totally. I like Robert a lot, but sometimes it's like some EvulBlogger version takes over and... boom! Where, as you say, is my fucking latte.

Posted by: Ian Betteridge at November 18, 2007 3:10 AM

The idea of pulling a Scoble, and calling a company out for not fellating my ego? Dear god, I hope I've never even come close, and if it ever appears that I have, then it was either unintentional, or the stupid made me do it, and I apologize.

Never fear John. We've got your back on this one. If you ever stoop to this level, we'll be sure to keep you honest. Keep fighting the good fight. Batteries and moleskin are on the way.

Posted by: Jeff Berg at November 18, 2007 9:46 AM

Ian, yeah, that did show a rather odd view of what AppleCare is for. I *think* they meant ProCare, which does get you to the head of the line in the Apple Stores, etc, but is considerably cheaper than AppleCare, and not an extended warranty at all.

Jeff, I fixed your tags, (there's no BBCode, just html), and yeah, I figured that should I ever start pulling a Scoble, I'll have people buying plane tickets to come out and mock me relentlessly...and my wife will be leading the pack ;-)

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 18, 2007 10:05 AM

Although I agreee with most of what you have written, Apple does give out the marketing that the MAcIntosh is so much more reliable than the PC. Having worked in a company who had both, this is not true. They are as good or as bad as the other depending how you look at it.

John, good to see you have't lost any of your sarcasm.

Posted by: Jonathan Sutherland at November 18, 2007 3:42 PM

Jonathan...of COURSE they do, it's called "Marketing".

What, you expect them to say "Macintosh...even though we suck as much as anyone else, we're prettier"? The difference is, people with a clue understand it's hyperbole and blow it off. Scobleites insist it be the god's honest truth.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 18, 2007 8:44 PM

Well, truth be told, many more near-illiterates than Scoble - or Scobleites (love the term) - think it to be true too.

Bottom line is that he had a pint which got lost in his hyperbole.... Leopard was released a couple of months too soon.

Enough Mac users are waiting to upgrade that it makes any honest "fanboy" (as opposed to "fanboi") cringe over those last 3 Mac v PC commercials Apple released last week.

Admit it John - those IN YOUR FACE ads that have "the PC" guy admitting he reverted to XP make you just a bit uncomfortable in light of how barely acceptable Leopard is today - 4 months later than the original release date.

That was Robert's _real_ point... until Le Scoble (love that term too) emerged.

Posted by: DaveD at November 18, 2007 9:54 PM

Dave, why would ads bother me? I don't personalize them, and honestly, unless it's coming from the Wii or my DVD player, the amount of television I watch can be measured in minutes per month.

Secondly, the "Mac OS X 10.5 was released a couple of months too soon" has been said about every release. Mac OS X 10.4 was unusable in my world until 10.4.3, Mac OS X 10.3.0 was odd, so was 10.2, 10.1 had a "HFS+ routines randomly truncate big files" bug, and so on, going back through every iteration of the Mac OS *ever*

I can say the same things about Vista, XP, Windows 2000, NT4, NT3.x, and so on.

You only get 'uncomfortable' over those ads if you take them as gospel. I don't, so I don't.

Actually, there's two features that make leopard a real bonus in my world, the fixes to mobile directory services, and the SNMP improvements. There's a few others, but those are the big ones. Our only reasons for waiting are some third party issues that are getting resolved by and by.

On 10.4.11, I've upgraded every Mac OS X 10.4 machine to it, no problems at all. But then, I'm a bit more sensible about upgrade planning than technophiles like Le Scoble.

Now, if we get into 200*9*, and people are still refusing, in huge numbers to upgrade, ala Vista today, that's more of an issue. But less than a month after the release? Please.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 18, 2007 11:15 PM

Well penned, man!

I never comment... but you whipped yurself up a beauty of a retort. Thank you for penning a nice little balloon popper!

Posted by: Tommmy at November 20, 2007 8:39 PM

"If I have one advantage, it's that I can type fast, and read faster, and I'm a decent sysadmin."

That's three advantages. (Sorry, I had to.)

Posted by: pgl at November 21, 2007 4:44 AM

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November 15, 2007

Ass-Raped by "The Deciderer" again

Once again, our glorious president shows where he stands on helping the U.S.A. be the leading center of scientific and medical research in the world:

In a cave, dressed in sackcloth, his fingers firmly in ears, (we can only hope he washed them when he removed them from other orifices), eyes shut, continuously screaming "IF THE BIBLE SAYS IT, IT MUST BE SO!!!"

Yet we have all the money in the world for his "Faith-based" bullshit...and we wonder why our kids view science and math education as punishment.

I'm going to go read "A Brief History of Time" again, and see if I can find DVD's of old Carl Sagan shows. They always make the dumb go away.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 11:23 | Permalink


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The bill, H.R.3043, also sought to bolster the budgets of the departments of Labor and Education, and carried a request for a total of $150.7 billion. Since its introduction in July, Bush has said he would veto the bill because it overshot his own budget recommendations. (From The Scientist, complaining about the veto.)

I see no reason to believe that the President vetoed this bill because of something related to the Bible - or even because of the NIH funding at all.

(For that matter, Federal education funding doesn't make state curriculums and education any better. You can blame the sorry state of science teaching on teachers [who are not trained in science and don't love it] and school boards.

That and kids have for the most part always viewed learning math as punishment. Most people aren't inclined to view abstract mathematical manipulation as pleasant.

Despite that, of course, Federal education spending is vastly up since 2000. The President has been typically approving of spending on Education like a drunken sailor, to no great effect. Oddly, this spending had no provisions for special "faith based" education or hostility to science or math education, that I'm aware of.

I must snarkily suggest that your assumption that the President's every action is based on religion or hostility to science is itself "faith based".)

Posted by: Sigivald at November 15, 2007 5:12 PM

Sig,

Take a moment to review the attitude of this administration towards science as a whole...He supports the teaching of ID on an equal level with evolution, in spite of the the utter lack of proper science and peer review. His inane attitude towards stem cell research, which is based entirely on his religious views.

He complains about the budget being too large, yet, oddly, I don't see him putting any of his faith-based pork on the chopping block.

They've been caught out removing parts of scientific papers they don't like.

(Federal funding for schools is not even a part of this post, so nice strawman there, by the way. However, I'll bet you a dollar that if 100% of that increase was for school vouchers and religious private schools, he'd praise that to high heaven. Funny how mr. "we can't spend like a drunken sailor" didn't discover his veto pen until his party lost power, even though the republican budgets went up on a regular basis too.)

Perhaps if this country started naming streets, buildings and the like after scientists instead of people who play games really well, and if our national leaders viewed science as something worthwhile, that would, you know, "trickle down".

But please...this is one of the most anti-science administrations on record with really one notable pseudo-exception: Bush backs sending us to Mars.

He didn't really budget for it, so we'll try to do it on the cheap. Thanks a pantload George.

But Bush has spent millions and millions on increasing the influence of religion, and fundamentalist christianity in particular, over our irreligiously designed government, and every time he bitches about "fat" in the budget, he's never talking about that.

I also have yet to see him say, about any form of scientific research funding, from theoretical to medical: "These items are critical to our future as a nation, and as a people, and we cannot afford to cut spending on the very things that allow us to find ways to cure disease and advance human knowledge."

Yet, he's quite passionate in defending every fucking dime he spends keeping his pet fundies happy.

So the above, along with his nigh-continuous voicing of his faith in "The Magic Man in the Sky" is rather nice evidence of his hostility towards anything that might contradict what the magic man's book says.

We won't even get into the republican congress's attitude toward's science. That was even worse.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 15, 2007 11:58 PM

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You know what?

If none of the presidential candidates are willing to have a serious debate on how they will approach government support and encouragement of math, science, and support for scientific research, (and I mean real science. Spare me voicing of support for bullshit like Reiki and the rest of the stupid. Along a similar vein, the only place ID belongs is right next to Voodoo, shamanism, and "Bullfinch's Mythology", and should be mocked unto the tenth generation), then to hell with all of them.

If they can't be bothered to seriously think about science, even though they could not reach the masses effectively without it, then none of them get my vote. I'll just vote for Joe Walsh. Sure, he's a little odd, but the press conferences would rock. Literally.

(Many, many thanks to PZ Meyers of "Pharyngula, Shelley Batts of "Retrospectacle", and all the other folks at ScienceBlogs for all their excellent posts on things scientific and cultural alike. It is comforting to see a community that devoted to improving the world and the silly people in it through the real pursuit of knowledge. In a country dominated by fundamentalist fear-mongering, and the exultation of ignorance and stupidity, ScienceBlogs, and its members are truly a light trying to guide us greatness.)


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Posted by John C. Welch at 11:17 | Permalink


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Perhaps they could be bothered in principle but they're just _able_ to seriously think about science.

"Never attribute to malice what you could attribute to incompetence", or so.

Posted by: ssp at November 15, 2007 1:33 PM

Yes! I'd vote for Joe Walsh in a heartbeat! The Rocky Mountain way IS better than the way we have!

Can we officially start a write-in campaign?

Posted by: George Krueger at November 15, 2007 4:12 PM

The Nova special on ID in Dover, PA that aired this week was excellent, by the way.

Posted by: Tom Negrino at November 16, 2007 12:28 PM

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November 14, 2007

I hearby declare...

Henceforth, ZDNet shall be both written and pronounced "ZDvorakNet", until such time as they perform a corporate cranirectoectomy, and their corpus callosum is no longer lodged within their descending colon.

So has it been written, so shall it be done.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 16:46 | Permalink


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JD's already rolling ten-sided dice for a new venue to spew forth from. His latest column at PC Rag suggests he may be hankering for the days when he had the back page of Macworld magazine. Good times.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 14, 2007 10:06 PM

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Just when I thought I wouldn't need the taser...

I see this pile of crap from, of course, ZD(vorak)-Net. I normally would ignore ZDNet, but since Tom Negrino, via Twitter, pointed out that Paul mentioned my review of Leopard in his silliness, well, I have to say something.

Paul is basically ragging on every Mac OS X 10.5 review as being nothing but puff-pieces. I get a special mention, because...

Now, obviously, I didn’t read all available reviews -but among those whose efforts I did read only one: John Welch writing for information Week, mentioned DTrace - and that in passing
Specifically, I said:
For developers and sysadmins who have a need to monitor the low-level activities of any application on a given Mac, Mac OS X 10.5 now comes with its own implementation of DTrace.

That's evidently not good enough for Paul. Well Paul, I wrote 5,528 words in that review. While I did not in fact, spend a lot of time on DTrace, it's because a) I'm not really a developer, and b) I don't know enough about DTrace to speak intelligently on it, so I, (here's the whacky part), didn't say anything about it because I would then be guilty of talking about something I don't know anything about. I know that's a silly concept at ZDvorakNet, but in my world, it's important. Of course, Paul leaves out the list of non-UI puffery that I did mention like:


But evidently, since I didn't spend another 10K words on developer items that I am rather unqualified to talk about, I was writing a barbie interview.

Of course, I'm still doing better than Ol' Paul, who is talking out his nethers all over the place:

Similarly, none of them mentioned ZFS or its relationship to “Time-machine”
That would be due to there not being a relationship between ZFS and Time Machine. (Not "Time-machine". Time Machine. Two words...."Time"..."Machine". Time Machine. New backup application from Apple. Big hit. Time Machine) Time Machine uses HFS+, not ZFS. Of course, the fact that ZFS support in Mac OS X 10.5 is read-only would make it rather hard to use it for backups, because, as I recall, there's rather a lot of writing in the backup process.
exactly nobody mentioned that the new Spaces capability (essentially the standard Unix multi-screen capability) now supports separating the display from the rest of the machine.
Huh? WirelessVGA? When did *that* happen? Or maybe he's confusing Spaces with Apple Remote Desktop. Paul...Spaces is just multiple desktops. It doesn't "disconnect" the display from the machine. It's not Terminal Services, nor is it even X11. That would be of course...um...X11.

It gets better:

But if you ignore the partisan reviewers and ask what the real bottom line on “Leopard” is, the answer turns out to be the iPhone - because the current Mactels are this generation’s Apple IIIs.
Okay, come on, admit it. There's a "Most Full Of Crap Article of the Month" award at ZDvorakNet, and Paul's really working it hard to get his bronze crapper. By the end of it, he's not even writing English:
What’s going on is that 10.5 is a mixed bag reflecting both short and long term agendas. In the short term it cleans up some x86 issues and offers some new user features raising the bar for Microsoft’s next effort -particularly with respect to time machine because this will be hard for Microsoft to duplicate while Apple’s adoption of ZFS means that all of the compexity here will disappear in the next release.

In the long term, however, what 10,.5 is about is positioning Apple’s application developers to jump to the integrated server/playphone world of the future - that’s why there’s so much Solaris and Java development stuff there.

I'd try to interpret that, but gosh, it appears I don't speak idiot.

Every time Paul Murphy mentions my name, I taser a baby. Is that what ZDvorakNet really wants?


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Posted by John C. Welch at 00:44 | Permalink


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I'm a blogger (wifinetnews.com) who proofs his own work and I'm not even as incomprehensible as Murphy is on a site that might expect to have some minimum editing requirements.

"new user features raising the bar for Microsoft’s next effort": That'll be great. I'm looking forward to Windows Rainier edition in 2012.

Posted by: Glenn Fleishman at November 14, 2007 1:27 PM

umm, John? I was actually praising you - you know as the only reviewer I read who actually noticed DTrace.

Now about ZFS vs time machine - here's the thing: TM wasn't quite ready when Tiger got released but has hung about ready to go ever since. i.e. it preceeds ZFS chronologically and is now in the product.

ZFS, however, does time machine better than time machine does. In other words you can expect the next release to use ZFS in the back end instead of all the silly symlinks etc used in TM. i.e. the next generation may look the same and be named the same, but will actually be a couple of zfs one liners.

The fun part here will be watching MS try to cope. Think they'll adopt ZFS? if not, they'll be forced to match all the complexity in TM - and that will be a hoot.

Posted by: Paul Murphy at November 14, 2007 4:04 PM

Paul, give me a break. You called every single review out there "My Pretty Pony Reviews Leopard", or close to it, including Siracusa's. Now, I rarely agree much with Siracusa, but a lack of technical depth? NFW man. In fact, you obviously didn't even try to google it too hard, or read Siracusa's review, or you would have seen that he spent a LOT of time on DTrace. Here, read it yourself: http://arstechnica.com/reviews/os/mac-os-x-10-5.ars/5

You also can't just suck it up and admit that your statement about Time Machine and ZFS was wrong, so now you have to dodge. Okay, fine, but you dive into inane trying to defend it:

Now about ZFS vs time machine - here's the thing: TM wasn't quite ready when Tiger got released but has hung about ready to go ever since. i.e. it preceeds ZFS chronologically and is now in the product.
Come on dude, you have any kind of proof? Besides, that still doesn't create some magical relationship between ZFS and Time Machine, it just shows you may be able to read a calendar. This ain't "Artie McStrawman's House Of MacZeal", you have to do better than that here.
ZFS, however, does time machine better than time machine does. In other words you can expect the next release to use ZFS in the back end instead of all the silly symlinks etc used in TM. i.e. the next generation may look the same and be named the same, but will actually be a couple of zfs one liners.
"I have no fucking clue as to how Time machine works, nor have I bothered to read the tech notes, so I will take a bunch of LSD and let my visions guide me."
The fun part here will be watching MS try to cope. Think they'll adopt ZFS? if not, they'll be forced to match all the complexity in TM - and that will be a hoot.
You obviously have me mixed up with the "ZFS IS THE SECOND COMING" crowd, which tells me you haven't bothered to read this site at all. Suffice it to say that unlike you, I don't cast everything in terms of what Microsoft will or won't do.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 14, 2007 10:49 PM

Freaking hilarious Welch. Nice work.

Posted by: Paul Teeter at November 15, 2007 6:54 PM

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November 13, 2007

C'mon crybaby, squirt a few

You know, the only thing missing from Abbie Smith's epic beating of Michael Behe and ID?

Film of her bouncing a basketball off his face telling him to squirt a few.

She's my new friggin' hero!


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Posted by John C. Welch at 23:19 | Permalink


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Ah, but have you read this, and additionally, seen these? You must. Now.

Posted by: Dori at November 13, 2007 11:33 PM

Hmmm... my last comment was never approved. Let's try this again...


if you liked that link, you'll like this one more (and follow the links to the Flickr slideshow w/ its comments--you won't regret it: http://scalzi.com/whatever/?p=121 .

Posted by: Dori at November 14, 2007 2:05 PM

I'd love to know how many of her colleagues are encouraged enough by this to step up to the plate. We need more real scientists out there with gumption.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 14, 2007 5:22 PM

OK, here's try #3 to post a comment here--will it work if it doesn't have any links or urls?

Posted by: Dori at November 14, 2007 6:31 PM

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November 8, 2007

You know you're warped when...

You realize there's been some bad domestic violence in an apartment in your building, there's like six cop cars, an ambulance, police tape sealing off your building...

...and what do Melissa and I quote from one of our favorite movies, almost in unison?

ARE WE ON COPS? ARE WE ON COPS? ARE WE ON COPS?

We are evidently incapable of taking this seriously...this was highlighted when I realized that I was joyfully taking pictures of the police tape.


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We've all come a long way since Kitty Genovese.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at November 8, 2007 2:08 PM

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November 5, 2007

Oh that's going to leave a mark

Here's a tip...never, never, ever piss off SA Smith, author of ERV. If you must, don't be like Michael Behe, and dismiss her qualifications when it comes to discussing things like the mutations and evolution of HIV et al.

Because if you do, it's going to hurt.

real bad.

I am rapidly becoming a science blog junkie.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 13:19 | Permalink


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Hey - I assume you read Pharyngula, PZ Myers' weblog. If you don't, do so! You'll probably enjoy it, lots of good smackdown.

Posted by: Chris Hanson at November 5, 2007 3:47 PM

Academic blogs in general are pretty interesting, I find.

Posted by: Pike at November 5, 2007 8:01 PM

I've also become a pretty big science blog junkie of late, though have followed some like BadAstronomy for a while. Pharyngula is my most frequent visit these days, though, because of the frequency of updates from PZ, and the breadth of topics he discusses.

Posted by: jfatz at November 6, 2007 7:19 PM

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November 1, 2007

I now understand why people buy Ferraris

Web gave me a ride in his Ferrari today.

Oh.My.God...what a car. At one point he asked "do you want to hear the stereo?"

My reply "No! I have all the sound I need coming from right behind me"

I also remember thinking "My, we appear to be going rather fast." Then I looked at the speedometer. 90+...in traffic My next thought? "Yes. We are indeed going rather fast."

I also know something else. A Ferrari is the male version of a vibrator.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 17:13 | Permalink


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If you can ever get your butt up here I'll let you *drive* my E-type.

Your vibrator analogy is spot-on. There is nothing so orgasmically satisfying as nailing a shift, or executing a perfect turn on a lonely mountain road, while the engine music soars and roars off the rock walls. That shove at the lower back as the reciprocal motion of the engine is transformed into rotational power by the crankshaft and all that torque pushes rubber over asphalt....

Ferraris are just one flavor of the full spectrum of automotive experience. (For a self-wrencher like myself, they are something of a non-starter since Maranello builds their cars to exclude do-it-yourselfers... not to mention the prices of everything.) Most cars are just appliances, and some have big engines and can go fast... in a straight line. But a few are truly engineered for pleasurable driving. They HANDLE. They can go fast, but they also turn in, they have predictable over/neutral/under-steering. They involve the driver. Those cars are few and far between, but are worth the effort to find, and hang onto.

--chuck
http://chuck.goolsbee.org

Posted by: chuck goolsbee at November 1, 2007 6:33 PM

Go figure... males enjoy a finely tuned and balanced motor.

Females enjoy an unbalanced motor.

Posted by: Ed Goham at November 1, 2007 7:04 PM

Big boys play with big toys. I'd love to have a Ferrari, or any other fine piece of Italian or German engineering that costs more than most people earn in a year.

Posted by: Arden at November 1, 2007 7:44 PM

"male version of a vibrator"...

So, how much was the bill to clean up the car after you were in it?

:)

Posted by: Shawn Levasseur at November 1, 2007 11:10 PM

Nice. I meet Web. You meet his Ferrari!

Posted by: KB at November 1, 2007 11:34 PM

KB, I kinda work for Web, so I see him a lot.

Shawn, Ferraris are self-cleaning. They have to be.

Posted by: John C. Welch at November 2, 2007 7:48 AM

Who is Web?

Posted by: Candide at November 2, 2007 3:10 PM

Which is why i bought a new Audi R8 and love it...

Posted by: kernalpanx at November 6, 2007 4:05 PM

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October 29, 2007

doh!

New rule: No more leaving easily -knocked over coffee cups on the laptop wrist rest where clumsy people like me can knock them over.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 20:01 | Permalink


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(Nelson)
Ha, ha!
(/Nelson)

--chuck
http://chuck.goolsbee.org

Posted by: chuck goolsbee at October 29, 2007 10:13 PM

Within the first week on a new job in 1998, I spilled half a can of ginger ale on the boss's PowerBook (which must have been a Wall Street G3). The screen went all staticky, then dark, just like in a movie where we lose communication with the outpost right as they're being torpedoed. I was terrified.

I'd been hired as a production designer, but also because I knew a little bit about fixing software problems.

But I shut down, unplugged, pulled the keys, alcohol-swabbed everything visible, and let the thing dry out for a day. I got lucky.

Posted by: Maurice Kessler at October 29, 2007 10:15 PM

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October 25, 2007

This is why Google succeeds

From an article on eWeek, about the Interop keynote delivered by Matt Glotzbach, Product Management Director for Google Enterprise:

"At Google, we really focus on failing wisely," Glotzbach said, noting that it's common at Google for programmers to create a feature and get it out online for testing in a few weeks. "There is no penalty for failure. In fact we encourage it because if you're not failing it means you're probably not trying."
If Google doesn't fear failing, they have removed the most serious barrier to success.

Another quote:

In another example, Glotzbach told the audience Google encourages its employees to use 20 percent of their time, or one day a week, to work on projects outside of their normal everyday workflow. Gmail and Google News both came from this approach, he note
Somehow, I don't see that happening at Microsoft.

As long as Google operates like this, they're going to continue to kick ass.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 05:54 | Permalink


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Somehow, I don't see that happening at Microsoft.

It rather looks like Microsoft "encourages" employees to give 20% of their outside Real Life to their Microsoft job project. One wonders how long it takes for people to get tired of that.

Posted by: Dan O'Donnell at October 29, 2007 11:05 AM

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October 22, 2007

September NPD Game Console Sales

Well, to put it bluntly, Halo 3 did something I was doubtful it could do: It had a huge effect on Xbox 360 Sales. AKA: Wow! For the first time since I started keeping track of these numbers, the Xbox 360 was the number one - selling console according to NPD. Numbers below:

Xbox 360: 527,800 Units
Wii: 501,000 Units
PS2: 215,000 Units
PS3: 119,400 Units

So even for being in second place, the Wii had a hell of a month, increasing their numbers from Sept. by almost 100K units. However, that's nothing like the month the Xbox 360 had. Personally, I think the entire Xbox team, and everyone associated with it at Microsoft should be kissing the asses of the Halo 3 team until they're soda-cracker white. That's pretty astounding that one game could do that.

Percentage of change from August:

Xbox 360: Up almost 91% Daaaaaaaaamn
Wii: Up close to 24%
PS2: Up by 6%
PS3: Down by around 9%

So really, the only loser here was the PS3. However, even taking the PS3's drop into account, there doesn't appear to be any cannibalization to account for the increased sales of the other three consoles. The 360's increase is far out of line compared to the PS3's decrease for there to be a direct correlation there, and there's no way you can say the 360 sales hurt the Wii at all. (Who in their right minds cries about a 24% increase even though Wii availability is still constrained?) It was just a hell of a month for everyone but Sony.

Now the real trick will be the next few months leading into the holiday buying season. Was the Xbox 360's increase strictly due to a...er....Halo effect, (dude, how could I AVOID that pun), or is this a sign of renewed sales strength over the long term for the 360?


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Posted by John C. Welch at 16:01 | Permalink


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I should point out that September is a five week month under NPD reporting (as are March, June, and December) and so all of your percentage analysis in this post, and some of your analysis in previous posts, is off.

The Wii, for example, just sells 100k a week for the last three months. They're supply constrained, not sales constrained. Under those conditions one could argue their five month post-Xmas 'slump' actually represented a total production of 75k with the usual summer fluctuations (Xmas was stockpiling, of course). They then increased total supply/month starting in July to 100k and have sold that ever since.

See, here for per week per month numbers and here for per month numbers.

Posted by: Wednesday Keller at October 22, 2007 4:29 PM

Wednesday,

Oh, the fact that NPD numbers are kind of bogus anyway, as they really cherry-pick their sources is another issue too. But within themselves, they're okay.

The five - week thing is a factor of having 52 weeks in a 12 month year. At some point, you have to deal with February, and 4 extra weeks. So some long, some not. That's just part of the numbers.

I'm really not trying to do in-depth analysis here. I mean, that would require far more work than I care to do. This whole thing started as a way to kind of point out to people that no, blind adherence to the "More Tech is all that counts" religion of Microsoft and Sony is not actually the thing that most people want from their games. That would be "fun". Simply continuing the same paradigm started a decade or so ago with prettier pitchers and sound was never going to do a great job of increasing the overall console sales market.

Nintendo took a real risk, and it's paid off. The only reason I kept doing it was that I just got used to it. This is about as fluff of a sales analysis series as you can get.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 23, 2007 7:57 PM

Well… they get about 64% of sales and adjust for the remainder, and are used by Sony/Microsoft/Nintendo as well and Peter Moore (Microsoft exec) quoted them as being amazingly accurate against Microsoft's internal numbers. VGChartz, on the other hand, just basically makes their numbers up and uses NPD to adjust afterwards. So I find their numbers trustworthy enough.

Oh I know why they have five weeks, I'm just saying stuff like this:

"Wii: Up close to 24%"

isn't true. The Wii sold the exact same 100k/week—there's just an extra week. That's all I was asking for, doing the slight bit of math to show sales trends by week. It's kind of misleading otherwise.


What's interesting (to me) is that without the Wii people would be saying gaming is dead. The Sixth Generation of consoles sold around 170 million. Against current Wii excluded sales the Xbox360/PS3 may (may!) hit 100 million in sales and I kinda doubt that. A bloody disaster, in other words.

The Wii, on the other hand, is doing PS2 numbers. I wouldn't be surprised to see it get over 100 million and possibly 120 million. The Wii, thank god, saved next generation gaming because Microsoft/Sony fucked up hardcore by not launching at $299 as their sole SKU. Cough NeoGeo, Saturn, 3DO cough. Idiots.

I'm with you on the 'more fun' part, certainly, the Wii is just so much more appealing than prettier graphics (I wouldn't turn them down, but the Wiimote beats graphics easily) and I suspect without the Wii gaming would be taking (as I outlined above) a major hit overall.

What's even more amusing is all the big gaming companies (EA, Square-Enix, Capcom, Sega, etc…) saying that they're focusing more on the Wii now and stuff like Dragon Quest IX being exclusive to the DS (hence Dragon Quest X probably being on the Wii) which is utterly insane if you look at the last decade of gaming & third parties relationship with Nintendo.

Insanely awesome, of course, because I have no real intention of buying anything other than a Wii :).

You have a Wii, right? What games are you looking forward to?

Posted by: Wednesday Keller at October 23, 2007 9:28 PM

On the NPD numbers, were I to look week to week overall, yes, you're correct. I'm doing this more as a comparison *only* within NPD's monthly releases. But like I said, the real purpose of this is a bit of a "neener-neener" to the techboy dick-waving on the other systems.

On the rest, you're dead perfectly right. Because everyone had locked themselves into the same general style of input device, it was almost impossible to do something truly new. Everyone had hammers, so all games were nails.

It also crippled casual gaming. I TRIED playing Prince of Persia: Two Thrones on a PS2. It SUCKED. I felt like I was studying for a test, not playing a game. But the Wii version? Dude, I play the hell out of that thing. Been taking a break from it, but yeah, had no problems. Same thing with Twilight Princess. I can't imagine doing some of the advanced combat moves with a "normal" controller.

As far as what kind of games? I want games that push that controller even farther. Sword fighting games that allow you to really use the Wiimote/Nunchuck to a much bigger extent. I'd love to see more games that avoid the buttons as much as possible and strictly rely on the movements.

I want to see how far you can push that controller, and maybe even some third party controllers. Dude, can you imagine a sword fight game using Nerf swords that were controllers? So you could actually fight your opponent? That would kick the shit out of online play. "Yeah, Xbox Live, Big Fucking Deal. WHAM! Now THAT, is a head shot."

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 25, 2007 8:53 AM

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October 21, 2007

Well? Where's my HDTV Epiphany?

Due to my old TV's AV inputs getting so bad as to be essentially useless, and Mel's not having a decent set of AV inputs, I got an LG HDTV last night. A nice one, LG 26". Would have gotten the Sony, but it was too big to fit in the entertainment center.

It's very nice, lots of inputs and outputs, easy to hook up.

So I have an HDTV. I have even watched things on it.

WHERE IS MY EPIPHANY??

According to Scoble, and his friend Buzz, I was supposed to have some fucking religious experience the moment I watched HD.

WHERE IS MY HD RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE?

WELL???

See, goddamned technology. Big promises, never delivers.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 09:06 | Permalink


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Maybe you should have gotten the 27"?

Posted by: Graham at October 21, 2007 10:49 AM

If you're already sitting far enough away that you can't see the lines, adding more resolution doesn't make any difference. For me, the epiphany came when I first watched a DVD or digital cable through either the S-video or component video inputs. Over twice the horizontal resolution, and no more dot crawl at every sharp edge due to the luminance and chrominance information being inextricably mixed together. After 40 years of watching composite video (the AV inputs are the same thing, just not up-converted to channel 3) THAT was akin to a religious experience!

Posted by: Arvid at October 21, 2007 9:35 PM

You're not going to have an HDTV ephiphany on a 26" TV. It's just too small. How far away are you sitting from this thing? If you're sitting farther away than 5' you need a 42". Under 5', I'd say minimum 37". 26", that's a computer monitor not a TV.

Posted by: Andrew at October 22, 2007 8:55 AM

I too, am waiting for my "moment". I just picked up a HD-DVD player for my Xbox 360. After watching SD-DVD using composite cables, I was expecting a major uptick in image quality that would help me justify a new, bigger set for the living room. What I got when I played my first HD-DVD was a definate improvement, and a feeling of total disappointment in regards to my expectations. My wife wasn't impressed either, and so I'll be keeping my current LG 37 inch LCD exactally where it is... There goes my plans for the man cave...

Posted by: Aaron Kay at October 22, 2007 11:24 AM

Composite cables? Composite cables will not transmit HD (neither will s-video). Did you mean component cables?

Posted by: Andrew at October 23, 2007 9:37 AM

You know, from your writeup it's not clear...

Do you have an HD source? An HD set displaying standard sources or even DVD isn't the epiphany; it's an HD set with an HD source.

Upconverted SD or ED (DVD) sources won't be impressive.

Posted by: Sigivald at October 23, 2007 4:18 PM

Oh, I know. This post was really me poking fun at the people who are WAY too enhusiastic about OMGHD.

As far as the size goes...there's no fucking way in HELL i'm paying over a grand for a television. Not unless it comes with HD blowjobs from Catherine Zeta Jones...in *person*.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 23, 2007 7:59 PM

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October 17, 2007

It was as though the voices of a billion pundits cried out, and were silenced

In another "letter to the world", Steve Jobs announced that there will be an iPhone SDK in February.

Gee, what a shock. Let's see, Leopard comes out on the 26th of October, and about 4 months later, there will be an SDK for the iPhone and the iPod touch. Why, one would think that you'd need Leopard to properly develop applications for the iPhone, and that it was silly to think that you'd get an SDK prior to Leopard. I wonder why, in all the screaming and crying and whining about the lack of an SDK on the iPhone, no one every pointed that out. Oh wait, a few of us did, but when you're the voice of reason in a room full of cranky infants, well, you don't get heard. But there were some voices saying that you probably wouldn't get an iPhone SDK until after Leopard.

Like mine:

The point is, unlimited third-party development on an embedded device with stringent operational requirements is not the magic spell of good and light that people think it is. That's not to say that I don't think Apple should release a "proper" SDK for the iPhone, just that I'd rather they take their time and create one that, above all else, does no harm. It's an iPhone -- I expect that part to never be troubled by anything other than carrier signal.
But there's another possible reason as to why Apple didn't release an SDK at the iPhone release: The version of OS X the iPhone is running. I'm going to make an educated guess, based on the way the iPhone does certain things, and how the iPhone's launch delayed Leopard, and say that the version of OS X that the iPhone is running is not, in fact, an embedded version of Mac OS X 10.4, but an embedded version of Leopard.

This is speculation, but I'm pretty happy with the reasoning behind it. If this is the case, then it would be quite difficult to release an SDK that allowed you to build features that don't run on the current OS release. Apple could build a "simulator," but unless that simulator included the full iPhone OS, it wouldn't be something you'd want to trust. True, Apple could have released an SDK at the recent WWDC, but then you'd have a (probably) beta SDK that used beta developer tools running on a beta OS release that targets a device with a tiny margin for error. This is not a recipe for reliability.

So I do think we'll see a "real" SDK, but it won't be until after the release of Leopard, at the earliest.

Mmmm...sweet, sweet reasoned analysis, even sweet 'cause it's mine.

Hmm...let's see...without screaming or whining, but a bit of critical thought, I was right. No screaming, no demands, none of that shit. Just a bit of thinking about what the iPhone is running, what Apple is doing, and the timing of various things. Maybe some other people getting all dramatic about stuff should think that over a bit.

Nah, it's the "blogosphere". Who wants "thinking" in that?

Oh, and Nick Winfield? Contrary to what you think, Apple never said "No non-web applications ever", so no, they did not in fact reverse their position.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 11:09 | Permalink


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You sir are a very sore winner. And Apple still completely fumbled the whole 3rd party app thing. If they had simply made this announcement when the iPhone was released, they could have avoided a whole lot of hullaballoo. The PR for this was handled in a completely amateur fashion, and the blame for all the ill effects can be laid at Apple's door.

Posted by: DBL at October 17, 2007 11:51 AM

Thanks for refuting all those dumbasses, Wingfield included. Sometime it really seems that someone locked that whole bunch of people in an echo chamber.

Anyway, from http://d5.allthingsd.com/20070530/steve-jobs-ceo-of-apple/

"1:15 p.m.: Is the iPhone’s platform closed? And if it is, will it be open to developers in the future? Jobs says it’s a security issue, but Apple is working to find a way to allow developers to build applications for it. Jobs says he doesn’t want the iPhone to be “one of those phones that crashes a few times a day.” He adds: “We would like to solve this problem and if you could just be a little more patient with us, we’ll do it.”

He said it then and said it again about native apps elsewhere after the iPhone (and its Web2.0 apps) was released. (I'm trying to find those articles)

Posted by: mark at October 17, 2007 12:45 PM

DBL: Apple does not promise things before it believes it can do them (unlike MS with Longhorn). Jobs would not promise an iPhone SDK until he was sure Apple was going to deliver (like he just did today). But Jobs did say that Apple was working on it from day one, if you were listening. (I'm still looking for the articles, which were on June 29 and 30th.)

I hope the "ill effect" would be that the hackers gain some humility through this. But, alas, your response, if typical, shows that will not be the case. So you sir are a very sore loser.

Posted by: mark at October 17, 2007 12:59 PM

So by this reasoning, developers will only be able to program for iPhone/iPod Touch using Macs? Not PCs, or other operating systems? If true (and I don't think it is), why would Apple impose such a limitation? The iPhone/iPod Touch are not restricted to Mac users.

Posted by: Question at October 17, 2007 1:11 PM

DBL: Apple does not promise things before it believes it can do them (unlike MS with Longhorn). Jobs would not promise an iPhone SDK until he was sure Apple was going to deliver (like he just did today). But Jobs did say that Apple was working on it from day one, if you were listening. (I'm still looking for the articles, which were on June 29 and 30th.)

I hope the "ill effect" would be that the hackers gain some humility through this. But, alas, your response, if typical, shows that will not be the case. So you sir are a very sore loser.

Posted by: mark at October 17, 2007 1:12 PM

@question - Yeah, I imagine that will be the only way to develop apps for the iPhone. That limitation will be imposed because the development tools will be XCode, and the apps are coded in Cocoa and Obj-C. You will be able to upload from either, but development will be done on the Mac. I see nothing wrong with this.

Posted by: e at October 17, 2007 1:32 PM

DBL...I'm a Sore Winner? BAAAHAHAHAHAHAA...dear lord, I haven't seen that since grade school. Screw that. I was right, and more importantly, I gave it a bit of thought as to WHY it might play out the way it has. I wasn't alone in that line of thought.

Of course, now that you can't whine about that, you whine about the PR, which of course translates too "APPLE DIDN'T KISS MY ASS". Pfah.

Question...The issue here is, as e said, one of "HOW" you develop applications. If it's using Cocoa frameworks, then while you in theory could develop from other platforms, it would be a pita.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 17, 2007 1:39 PM

Yep, you called it right, John. I thought this would likely be the scenario, too -- they would release an SDK but not until they were good and ready.

Some of Jobs' announcement is fluff -- "vibrant ... community ... revolutionary" -- but this is true enough:

"It will take until February to release an SDK because we’re trying to do two diametrically opposed things at once—provide an advanced and open platform to developers while at the same time protect iPhone users from viruses, malware, privacy attacks, etc."

What Jobs -- unsurprisingly -- didn't mention, but what we can hardly forget, is that ISE already found a problem in Safari:

http://www.securityevaluators.com/iphone/

And, since Jobs' mentioned "privacy", too, there's this issue:

http://blog.dave.cridland.net/?p=32

Mobile phones, as they become both more powerful and more popular, look like they might become an increasingly attractive target. The iPhone launch date was not not the time to rush out a half-baked kit for third-parties just because some people were too impatient to wait.

One suspects the iPhone is already running a version of Leopard (not Tiger). And, again, I think you were spot-on to say: "it was silly to think that you'd get an SDK prior to Leopard."

Nokia's opportunistic sloganizing looks silly now, too. Nokia makes some nice phones, but, in comparison with the changes Apple have brought to the industry, Nokia have nothing to be proud of. Never mind that I could have some (often pretty overpriced and underperforming) third-party applications right now on a Nokia; Nokia hasn't itself offered anything as paradigm-changing as Apple. Nor has it been pushing out regular updates to its phones' software at all let alone via a well-thought-out update mechanism such as iTunes. Their business model, and that of the operators, has been push out phones, leave 'em be, and sell the customer a new one in one to two years with the real hardware cost hidden in a contract price.

Posted by: Nick at October 17, 2007 1:39 PM

I tend to side with DBL on this one.

For example, if I were Steve, I'd have mentioned this at WWDC. Will Apple allow third-party developers? "We plan to, once we overcome some technical obstacles." And leave it at that.

Perhaps also have a session at WWDC where Apple says, "If you want to write applications for the iPhone, here are the technologies we recommend you use and here are the technologies you should avoid."

As developers, we're an understanding group because we've been there and done that. If Apple says, "Yes, we are planning on opening this up at some point in the future." that's good enough for me. I can understand there are technical issues and contractual issues and a bunch of other issues that need to be dealt with. But the fact that Apple is planning on opening it up (versus something like, "Well, your input on this issue is appreciated...") means that I can start doing things--designing model classes and such--knowing full well that someday I'll be able to implement them.

By the way, "mark", I wish you luck finding it. Pretty much all levels of Apple have said, "We're considering this," which can mean many different things. I can't go to my company and say, "I want to develop this product" based on what Apple has released to the public so far.

Posted by: Peter at October 17, 2007 2:37 PM

For example, if I were Steve, I'd have mentioned this at WWDC. Will Apple allow third-party developers? "We plan to, once we overcome some technical obstacles." And leave it at that.
Peter, if you really think that wouldn't have created even MORE of a constant stream of whining, and completely killed off all Web development for the iPhone, then you're new to the Mac web. That's a fantasy, if you think it would have done anything but created more whining about "bogus invented problems to keep us from what is rightfully ours".
Perhaps also have a session at WWDC where Apple says, "If you want to write applications for the iPhone, here are the technologies we recommend you use and here are the technologies you should avoid."
Now you've gone from an announcement to a session on something that they might not have even started on. Again, the idea that you'd get an SDK before leopard was inane. What good would it do to tell people "here, stay away from this, but we can't actually tell you for sure what TO use, because we haven't figured it out ourself in a final enough form to tell you." That's REAL useful.
As developers, we're an understanding group because we've been there and done that. If Apple says, "Yes, we are planning on opening this up at some point in the future." that's good enough for me. I can understand there are technical issues and contractual issues and a bunch of other issues that need to be dealt with. But the fact that Apple is planning on opening it up (versus something like, "Well, your input on this issue is appreciated...") means that I can start doing things--designing model classes and such--knowing full well that someday I'll be able to implement them.
If you read what Apple *actually* said vs. the "blogosphere" whiny bitches, they DID say they were thinking of how to do it, because they knew they couldn't do it all. As well, without knowing what frameworks will be implemented in the SDK, you can't do much at all beyond some vague GUI work.
By the way, "mark", I wish you luck finding it. Pretty much all levels of Apple have said, "We're considering this," which can mean many different things. I can't go to my company and say, "I want to develop this product" based on what Apple has released to the public so far.
Since the return of Steve Jobs, when has Apple engaged in MS-like vapor PR campaigns? Do you men to say that you'd prefer "Oh yeah, we'll do that...some day" with meaningless details that would have no grounding in reality? Is that really how you do your product development planning?

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 17, 2007 4:13 PM

Hey Peter,

I sure hope you didn't go to your company asking to develop a piece of software around Microsoft's shouted-aloud promises for Vista nee Longhorn. Ha ha ha!

Posted by: mark at October 17, 2007 6:18 PM

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Stupidity in large numbers doesn't equal smart

It just equals mass stupidity.

One of the things I rant about regularly is the tendency towards "echo chamber" behavior in the "blogosphere". That is, one site publishes something and dozens more all automatically agree with it, even if it's stupid. Sometimes, especially if it's stupid. Now, this is nothing new. Echo chamber behavior has been going on as long as there have been people. It's just that the intarweb makes it happen so much faster. A great example of this was the somewhat recent dustup about Harry McCracken at PC World. He quit to preserve his "journalistic integrity". Everyone came down on Colin Crawford, because, supposedly, Colin didn't like an article that was critical of advertisers. This idea was ridiculous if you have followed the publications Colin's run, but once the "blogosphere" echo chamber got ahold of it, bang, done. The funny thing was, out of all the posts about it on Techmeme, there was pretty much one original article. The rest all linked to/quoted that. It was a "big" story, but only one person did any actual work. Everyone else? LinkLinkLinkLink.

The result? Echo Chamber at warp speed.

Some other folks are noticing this, such as Tim O'Reilly. In a recent post on O'Reilly radar, he says:

There's always a risk of self-fulfilling prophecies in social media. Sites or applications become popular, and then stay popular because they are popular. This may be a key to the unusually high concentration of Facebook applications in the "short head" rather than the "long tail." When a system provides powerful feedback mechanisms for herd behavior, it can actually undermine the "wisdom of crowds" rather than enhancing it. (One of James Surowiecki's key observations in his book of that name was that a diverse collection of independently-acting individuals produce the wisdom of crowds effect. To the extent that those individuals reinforce each other's opinions rather than preserving independent decision making, they tend to undermine that group intelligence.)

But there's an even more insidious corollary: when a group of seemingly independent actors are making decisions based on the same limited pool of information, they become more highly correlated, and thus "stupider."

Now, in this paragraph, Tim is specifically talking about things like Facebook, but it applies to the way the "blogosphere" works in general. Don't believe me? Take a look at what happens when Scoble or Winer say something stupid. (It doesn't take long.) Because they're "A-list" bloggers, they get up on Techmeme. Of course, this prompts a dozen or more posts that are little more than comments on what the original stupid was, but these new posts are not commentary or analysis. For the most part, they're an electronic version of Limbaugh "dittoheads". But they keep that original stupidity going, and suddenly, the stupid has become the truth, because there's so many people talking about it like it's true. It's "The Big Lie", only at speeds that make worldwide propagation nigh-simultaneous.

(As an aside. I am not saying that you should never comment on someone else's post, or write your own article about another post. Since this article, and quite a few of my other posts are literally, about other posts, that would be silly. But don't *parrot* the posts. It is the *parroting* that creates the echo chamber.)

Later on in the article, Tim directly addresses this:

So what does this have to do with techmeme? When reviewing the Techmeme leaderboard, and then bouncing from there over to Techmeme itself, I was struck by the fact that the surest way to stay up on the leaderboard is to make sure to comment on stories that are currently appearing on the front page of techmeme! This is a self-reinforcing system, where all of the major tech blogs end up covering the same stories. Yes, someone always breaks the news, but you see this amazing pile-on effect. I'm not sure it's healthy.

Pile-on = echo chamber.

It's not just Tim O'Reilly talking about it. One of my favorite Chuqs, in fact, the only Chuq I know talks about this too, and uses the iPhone as an example. He has a great quote on this effect:

The first thing an echo chamber does is convince itself it's not an echo chamber
Chuq further uses the Apple TV and the iPhone to illustrate not just how silly the echo chamber can be, but how self-delusional.
Classic cases of this are the iPhone and the Apple TV. Both are products that are built for consumers, and while they have strong geek attraction, they aren't built and designed for geeks. Geeks complain about things these products don't do. Apple ignores them. Geeks try to spin them into failures because they don't cater to geeks. the product sells zillions of units anyway. The geeks brains hurt.
Dear lord yes. If you tool around the "blogosphere", you'd think both were utter failures, or the tools of ultimate evil because they don't cater to geeks. But that's not really the case:
for instance, best as I can find, the new generation Tivo sold 30,000 units in the first few months. Apple TV? 250,000 units. Yet you look around the geek echo chamber, and they declare the Apple TV a failed product, while drooling over Tivos. Of course, if you read Sean Avery's NY Times article this week, you'll see he calls out his Apple TV as a toy he loves. It's a great product. Just not a geek product. But since all products ought to be geek products -- that makes it a failure inside the geek echo chamber.
One thing to keep in mind about the "blogosphere": the number of Scobles in it far outnumber the number of normals. That is, regardless of how many people chant the mantra of the blogosphere, "it is the ultimate in democracy, and therefore the perfect medium", the truth is, it's still mostly made up of technophiles. Crap like Techmeme and Digg exacerbate this to where most of the volume is from a crowd of geeks and technophiles, all convinced that they are the true force in making great products. This is hilarious when you consider how few of them have ever created anything beyond geek toys. Winer's one of the few who ever did anything for normal people.

Another example is the hue and cry over iPhone unlocking. If you believe the blogosphere, everyone wants this. That's crap. Geeks want this, and the only numbers I've seen, (courtesy of Chuq), look like, at most, ten percent. Now, ten percent is a decent number, but it's not a majority, it's not even a large minority. But it is a loud minority. Or as Chuq says, (he thinks the unlocking numbers are closer to 5% rather than 10%):

Still not a small number: 5% of a million iPhones is 50,000 iPhones; a great little cottage industry, but it's still ONLY 5%. And for all of the geeks who want the iPhone to fail because it doesn't do all the things THEY want, and obviously, everyone wants those things.

Except, of course, Apple's selling hundreds of thousands of iPhones. Why? because if you get outside the geek echo chamber, most people don't CARE about what the geeks care about. They want the iPhone.

That, by the way, makes geeks crazy. Just frothing at the mouth nuts. They won't admit it in "public", not ever, but deep down, they know that they are this minority, and the iPhone, and the Apple TV, and the Wii are all wildly successful without their approval. Even worse? The manufacturers of those products don't give a rat's ass about geek approval. Telling geeks that "As it turns out, selling to everyone but you is a much better idea than not" makes their insecurities rise to the fore in a big way. Once that happens, well, even reality doesn't mater.

Just because a lot of people agree on something, they're still wrong. They're just louder about it.


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Actually, the "A-listers" are but the tiniest fraction of the blogosphere; most of the blogosphere is made up of MySpace blogs and LiveJournal. Of course, the A-listers conveniently ignore that; I recall at one point a few years ago Scoble was crowing about how there were N million blogs, when LiveJournal alone had that many actively-used accounts.

Posted by: Chris Hanson at October 18, 2007 11:06 PM

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October 16, 2007

It's the end of the world as we know it...

...a pundit just a-pol-o-gized...

No, really. Robert Strohmeyer wrote an error-laden post, and instead of trying to justify it or dance around it, ala Dvorak and too many others, he apologized and corrected it.

Don't believe me? Read it yourself:

Dear readers,

Last Friday, I posted a commentary about the shortcomings of the iPhone with respect to business computing environments. Unfortunately, in my hasty exploration of the iPhone's software, I overlooked an important feature of the device and erroneously stated that the iPhone does not include support for virtual private networking. In fact, it does include VPN support. I also misstated that the iPhone does not open Word and Excel documents. What I had intended to say was that it cannot edit them. I deeply regret these errors, and I offer my sincere apologies to all of the readers of Networking Know-How and PCWorld.com.

The original text of the post follows.

Sincerely,
Robert Strohmeyer

If only more folks would do that, what a bright world this would be.


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October 12, 2007

A minor correction

The only time I was on my computer during my honeymoon was when I had to be to fax some things to the movers.

All the other times? iPhone. I quite deliberately picked a place with no internet access on premises.

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of course they called you from work ANYWAY!! haaaaaaaaa
congrats to both of you :)

Posted by: lyn at October 12, 2007 3:49 PM

Bite me :-P

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 17, 2007 4:21 PM

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October 11, 2007

Frozen Jesus on a Stick

Damn dude, at least make me wait a day before finding yet another reason to use my "Steve Ballmer - Dumbass" tag.

What's next, he's going threaten to sue Chris Burke for personal image infringement?1 It could happen, Ballmer's just that stupid, hell, it already sounds like Enderle is writing his speeches.

1) calm down people. obviously chris burke is far smarter, humorous, talented, and more sane that ballmer will ever be. it's just a shame that ballmer keeps doing a "single white female" on chris...it's gettin' kinda stalkerrific, ya know? chris, if you read this, i'll understand if you're offended that i compared you to ballmer, but it was either you or young frankenstein, and these days, you're the more interesting, not done-to-death reference.

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Ballmer Envisions A New Course For Microsoft

Tell me another one Steve, I never get tired of this story.

Does anyone outside of his paid assistants really give a rat's ass what Ballmer has to say on anything besides what brand of moisturizer he uses on that great shiny skull of his? I bet Skeletor would love to know, as the S-man has some wicked dry scalp. Come on people, Ballmer's about as relevant as someone bitching about who won the county "Hustle" dance contest on disco revival night, only with worse taste in clothes. Ozzie's not much better, (he designed NOTES and GROOVE. Exactly WHAT does Ray Ozzie know about designing software for HUMANS? That's right, NOTHING).

Here's everything Ballmer will say for the next ten years:

"Blah, blah, cloud, blah, blah, services, blah, blah windows is still the center of it all, blah, blah, Zune/Xbox/Live/<insert me-too product>, blah, blah, thin clients suck unless they talk to windows, blah, blah, Open Source is a marginal group of fanatics, blah, blah, Oh yeah, we make stuff for Macs, blah, blah, I promise, the stock price will stop sucking any day now."

It's all he's said for the last few years, why should the next decade be any different?

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um... get back to your honeymoon.

--chuck
http://chuck.goolsbee.org

Posted by: chuck goolsbee at October 11, 2007 11:23 PM

I am back ya goof. You think I'd be posting if I wasn't?

Posted by: john C. Welch at October 11, 2007 11:26 PM

"We're not going to move, in my opinion, to a world where everything is done on a very thin client."

Yeah, because that worked *so* *well* for Sun. While you're at it, have you considered invading Russia in the winter?

Posted by: Robert at October 12, 2007 8:10 AM

On the plus side, well, Ballmer's not entirely wrong.

"Open source", as a "movement", really is a bunch of marginal fanatics, from everything I've seen (and I say this as someone who's run omglinuxomg for well over a decade now, and been exposed to the constant flood of "movement" spew the entire time).

And the X-Box is a good console; I don't think I'd consider it a me-too, as I would the Zune.

Posted by: Sigivald at October 12, 2007 2:16 PM

Sigvald, that completely ignores open source projects run by adults who aren't freaks, such as Apache, Mono, Samba, Nagios, and dozens of others. The problem is, Ballmer is the only legitmate voice of Microsoft, whereas the Stallmanites are marginal freakboys more interested in how "moral" you are rather than putting out good software.

The XBox was developed only because Sony and others were making a ton of money in that market. The featureset and overall design were nothing but a shot at Sony. The Wii is the last really original idea in Consoles for a decade or so, and it shows. Does anyone other than geeks in dickwaving contest really give a fuck about pixel count and polygon speed? No. They just want to play games and have fun. Neither Sony or Microsoft seem to get this. So yes, the Xbox is a me-too product. Me-too to the Playstation.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 12, 2007 3:46 PM

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October 1, 2007

Sherman, fire Up the Contrarian machine

"Shut her down Clancy, she's blowin' mud!"

That's something I heard as a way of saying that an oil well was all tapped out. Alas, there are few things in life that are all tapped out, but one of them should be the screaming about the Apple 1.1.1 update. I get people are pissed. I get people want total control over ever damned doo-dad they own. However, the screaming on this issue is getting stupid, to where I'm of the opinion: "Just take the fucking thing back, eat the restock fee and get the fucking Blackberry you obviously wanted in the first place, and some fucking iPhone skin. Get a Windows Mobile device, get a fucking Treo, but for the love of god, stop whining."

Were you to listen to it, you'd swear that Apple had personally gone into their houses, and violated their dogs.

One of the longer, better written screeds on this is by Rob Griffiths in Macworld. I think Rob's wrong all over the place, and I'll guess he's never had to do either developer or large-scale user support, but at least he can put together a proper English sentence on a consistent basis. That doesn't make him right, but it's easier to read such things when they are well-written.

However, as you’ve also read by now, the update did a few other things. First, as Apple had warned, it turned unlocked iPhones into expensive paperweights, rendering them useless. (A Macworld staffer who unlocked his phone so that we could document this procedure, had this happen to his iPhones.) Second, if you had a modified iPhone that ran third-party applications, like I had, the update removed those apps. So much for my plea to Apple. Finally, if you used Ambrosia’s iToner, or any other such ringtone utility, you discovered that all your custom ringtones were also gone.
"So much for my plea to Apple". I think that right there is a central point in this. Rob wanted something very badly and didn't get it. He's so very mad about this that he ignores a few things. First, in what universe did he think that Apple would, considering the deal with AT&T, not ruthlessly undo unlocking procedures, or at the very least, invalidate that device? (Spare me any ranting about AT&T being so evil you have to do it. Bullshit, because for that argument to have any validity, there would have to be some cellular provider that wasn't a festering pool of greed and corruption. Since there is not, stop acting like AT&T is that special. They aren't. All cell providers suck. Arguing which one sucks worse is like arguing about which hurts more, getting stabbed in the eye with a dull ice pick or a rusty nail. Furthermore, all my dealings with AT&T have been at worst, professional, but I've had several potentially sticky problems handled in a very nice manner for all concerned, with nary a bad attitude to be found. Just like Sprint. Hmm...) Apple and AT&T have a contract, one, I'll guess, which has very specific requirements for both parties. For Apple to know about ways to unlock the phone from AT&T and not do anything about it could be seen as tacit approval. That would be bad for Apple, but very good for AT&T, or at least AT&T's lawyers. Or Apple could just be acting like a bunch of dicks. However, I've learned that if you have two choices for stupid maliciousness, and one option is a cell provider, go with the cell provider first. Do I think it's a great strategy? No. But then, I know Apple doesn't give a fuck what I think, and I'm fine with that. I bought the iPhone with full understanding of its limitations, and don't see how whining that those limitations are really real is any better than people moving next to an existing airport and discovering that, OMGWTFKHAAAAAN!...airplanes are loud.

Rob also leaves out that a lot of the changes that broke iToner and the like have to do with application signing. I won't go into that whole deal, because it's equal parts good idea and stupid, but will suffice it to say that unlike a general purpose computer, which the iPhone is not, an embedded device, which the iPhone is, is a good place for application signing. Do I miss my iToner ringtones? Sure, but come on, it's a picayune thing to whine about on this scale.

Unlike most Apple software updates, I held off on running this one until there were some field reports about exactly what happened. Once those reports started trickling in, I came to a painful but obvious conclusion: I will never install the 1.1.1 update on my iPhone.
"BUT THEY CAN NEVER TAKE AWAY...OUR...FREEDOM!!!!!" Spare me the histrionics and drama. "Unlike most Apple updates". Please. Rob, if you blindly run every update Apple releases as soon as it comes out, you have far more problems than the iPhone 1.1.1 update. But I don't actually believe you do that.
I’ve chosen not to upgrade because I value the productivity, entertainment, and customization abilities offered by the third-party applications I’ve added to my iPhone. I don’t want those abilities to go away just to earn the “right” to send Apple more money via the new Wi-Fi Music Store. No thanks; my iPhone will stay at version 1.0.2 for quite a while, it seems.
"I bought the iPhone knowing that it really didn't meet my needs, and so relied on unsupported hacks to make it usable. With that in mind, I shall never update my phone again, because potential security flaws are far outweighed by Tetris." <eyeroll>
Now, if some brilliant individual or team of individuals figures out how to work around the locks that Apple has put in place on the iPhone and again enables third-party apps, I will then upgrade my phone—I want the new features, but not badly enough to give up what I’ve already got.
"I've spent far too much time and effort on this to get something that would better meet my needs out of the box. Given enough time, I'll come up with a nearly coherent reason to explain this."
Now, before I go any further, I believe Apple was well within its rights to do exactly what it did. I understand that I (well, my employer) purchased a phone that wasn’t designed to run third-party applications; that it’s Apple’s right to upgrade the iPhone however it sees fit; and that if bad things happen to my modified iPhone as a result of any Apple upgrade, it’s not Apple’s fault.
"However, I'm going to spend pages and pages explaining why Apple is a big bunch of assholes for doing this thing that they had every right to do and even warned us about, because otherwise, this post would be really short."
I also understand that the new encrypted communications between the iPhone and iTunes may very well have been necessary to prevent SIM unlock programs, which directly impact Apple and AT&T revenue, from being created. I fully believe that Apple has the right to do what it needs to do to protect its revenue, and that of its partners.
"See? I'm showing that I'm really quite reasonable. It will make the rest of my screed look better, even in the face of factual error."
Still, with that understanding, I have to ask…what was Apple thinking?
"How dare you not spend time and effort to work around random unsupported hackery to give the 95% of iPhone users stuff they seem to really like in spite of the fact that it pisses me off?"
What I don’t understand is that Apple apparently doesn’t see any upside to allowing third party applications on the iPhone. This confuses me, because an active third-party development community can only help, not hurt, Apple’s bottom line. If there’s a large and diverse pool of iPhone applications available, then there’s a large group of potential customers (think geeks and techies, at the least) that would put the iPhone on their shopping list. If they then chose to buy the device, Apple would welcome both the initial $399 in hardware sales as well as the portion of the monthly service charge it’ll receive from AT&T.
Ah, this old saw..."Sell features for techies, we drive sales, we're the people who get non-techies to buy your stuff!" You know, this is crapola when Scoble uses it, and it's crapola here too. Here's my answer for that one. If geeks and techies were that important, the iMac and the Wii would have been great whopping failures, because neither of them are aimed at that market, and indeed, that market tends to not like either. Perhaps propellerheads are not the great indicators of success they so desparately want us to think they are. I've had over a hundred non-techies ask me about my iPhone and none of them have cared about hackery and third party applications. Only one asked me about Exchange, and I knew he would anyway. Linux sells to geeks, Apple sells to normal people. Who's doing better, Ubuntu or Apple?
These poll results seem to show that there is such a market of potential consumers out there: fully 15 percent of the respondents indicate they are no longer planning on purchasing an iPhone, thanks to the inability to run third-party applications with the 1.1.1 update. (And an amazing 42 percent of the voters are taking the same approach as I, and simply not upgrading their iPhones.) Granted, this isn’t a scientific poll, but the number of respondents in the “will not buy now” category indicates that there are quite a few users who value the ability to run third-party applications on their phones.
Rob's using an Internet Poll to back his opinion up. I don't have to say anything else here, except to note that his "quite a few users" adds up to, according to when I looked at that poll, right around 10,000 people. That's not exactly a huge groundswell anywhere but the intarweb echo chamber, and I'm assuming no one voted more than once.
So how does Apple lose at all by enabling (and hopefully helping to promote) third-party applications on the iPhone? The company gains more hardware sales, and more revenue from monthly service fees from AT&T. It seems like a no-brainer decision to me, but apparently I’m mistaken.
Well Rob, no, they don't actually gain more revenue in fees from AT&T off the phones that are unlocked now do they? No, no they don't. You may want to reword that part. Of course, now Rob's splitting hairs by attempting to disassociate "third party application developers" from the "hacktivators". I don't really buy it either.

But here's the biggest mistake of the piece:

I think this is completely the wrong approach: The iPhone is a Mac, and it should be treated as such.
No, it's not. It's nothing like a Mac. By Rob's logic, there's no real difference between my Verizon 6700 Windows Mobile device and my Toshiba Wintel box at work. Just because it runs OS X, it's not automatically a Mac, and no amount of wishing nor Tinkerbellian hand-clapping, nor clicking of heels even in sparkly red shoes shall change that. The iPhone is not a Macintosh. Even if Apple comes out with a proper SDK for it, it's still not a Macintosh. Nor shall it ever be. I understand that Rob wants it to be a Mac, and very badly, but it is not one. It is a computer, but not all computers are the same. Rob, and the others under his banner really need to learn that, and badly.
When you combine the iPhone’s OS X core with the large, gorgeous and innovative multi-touch screen, there’s an amazingly vast amount of software that could be developed for the iPhone.
There's a lot that could be developed for almost any computer. That still doesn't make the iPhone a Mac, anymore than it makes the iPod a B&O system. Similarities of function do not create identical states of being.
In just a few months, we’ve seen more than 60 applications developed for the iPhone—and all of them were created without any sort of documentation or an official development kit from Apple!
This describes almost every programmable device ever made. The iPhone is nothing new here. The fact that it has been hacked doesn't make it special. It just makes it a programmable device. Just because it says "Apple" doesn't make it all different and unique.
There are developers eager to help turn the iPhone into a most amazing device, if only Apple would recognize the potential of the platform and the contributions that third parties could make to its success.
Who says they haven't? Maybe Rob, Apple's not as stupid as you think they are. Maybe they're waiting for an OS release that would be the same basic version as the one on the iPhone? One that wouldn't be in beta? With dev tools that weren't in beta. Maybe they're a little busy on that, and decided that an iPhone SDK can wait for said OS release. Nah, it's stupidity. That's the only possible answer.
And why would we need third-party applications on this “revolutionary and magical product that is literally five years ahead of any other mobile phone,” as Steve Jobs described it? Well, this revolutionary device lacks a full Internet messaging (chat) program, something you can find on the giveaway phones found in any cellular store. This revolutionary device lacks the ability to locate itself on a map, something found in quite a few phones via a GPS chip. This revolutionary device lacks any way to customize its look, beyond the opening screen wallpaper—again, you’ll find this ability exists on nearly every other cell phone out there. This revolutionary device can’t customize sounds for various events, such as the new mail sound, the sent message sound, and the unlock sound. This revolutionary device can’t play any games, unless they’re hosted on a web page. This revolutionary device can’t use any MP3 as a ringtone, unlike many giveaway cellphones.
Astoundingly, a rather huge number of people know this, and don't give a fuck. Jesus, it can't make me a margarita, nor can it give me a pedicure, do I slam Apple for everything the iPhone doesn't do? $DEITY$ on a stick, what's next, the iPhone sucks because it doesn't squirt like a Zune?
But amazingly enough, my iPhone can do all of those things, and much more. All thanks to the third parties, who have done all of this without Apple’s help, and without any sort of official documentation. Just imagine what would be possible if they had both support and documentation: The iPhone really could be a revolutionary device.
Right, because a safe supported SDK and dev environment on an embedded device is something you just whip up overnight, and that infrastructure takes no time at all. They take no time, just ask Microsoft and Palm, why they've never had a third-party application written with their SDKs do anything bad to the device they run on.
I think Apple blew it here, and blew it in a big way. Instead of embracing and extending the development of third-party applications, it seems they’ve gone in the opposite direction: to make it as hard as possible for third-party applications to exist. From a consumer’s perspective, this is awful, as it’s removing choice from the consumer—not everyone is going to want the same apps and the same look on their iPhone, yet that’s what Apple’s telling us we must have (“Enjoy your new iPhone. Everything you could ever want is right there, and we’re sure you’ll love the theme we’ve installed for you.”)
Yeah, who'd want a device like that..why, it would be as hard to sell as the iPod! Again, Rob is confusing his loud, yet really astoundingly small geek squad with the larger set of all consumers, and while I bet his ego purrs like a well-fed tribble when he does that, it's still not true. Rob, the vast majority of consumers don't hack their shit. Ever. Again, I give you the success of the iPod as evidence.
Of course, consumers still do have a choice, but that choice is to purchase a competing brand’s smart phone. Is that what Apple really wants us to do?
At this point, I almost wish that a certain segment of the iPhone population would do that, and soon. Really. You never really wanted an iPhone in the first place, so please, go buy something that you do want.
Until that happens, though, I’ll keep using my non-updated iPhone with its assortment of third-party applications, and hope that Apple eventually sees the upside of opening iPhone development to those who are eager to extend and enhance this amazing device.
"I'll make sure that I make all of you who don't give a fuck about hacking the iPhone suffer until I get what I want."

Look, I get wanting more out of the iPhone, but come on already, enough. If third party developers are that important to you, then why the hell did you buy the thing knowing it was missing a critical feature? However, since you did, if you must whine and gripe about this, and obviously you must, then stop assuming you speak for the majority of iPhone users, or anything more than a vocal whiny majority minority. The rest of us are quite happy with the device we bought when we bought it, and are getting tired of being misrepresented.

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Posted by John C. Welch at 23:04 | Permalink


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You, sir, are the wind beneath my wings.

Posted by: Jon at October 1, 2007 11:36 PM

Dude, that's SO scary...

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 1, 2007 11:49 PM

John, you probably meant vocal whiny MINORITY in that last paragraph. Other than that, you nailed it. I call these your STFU articles, and you are a masterly bastard at this category. Keep it up.

Posted by: Suman Chakrabarti at October 2, 2007 10:16 AM

DOH! thanks for the catch Suman. Fixed.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 2, 2007 10:56 AM

I bought the iPhone once I knew it could be unlocked (since you can't add an iPhone to an AT&T corporate account-- I had to unlock my iPhone to use it with AT&T. How's that for a backwards cell company?) I understood the risk that an Apple update might break it, and right now I'm cool with the tradeoffs in running older firmware so I can carry one phone instead of two. Third-party apps? I have a couple, and they're cute but not indispensable. (I might feel different about my terminal app if I could figure out how to hit control-- editing text files without the ability to save 'em is less than useful.) Ringtones? Whatever. If AT&T would let me use my iPhone with my corporate account I'd have no need to unlock the beastie at all.If worst comes to worst and the iPhone bursts into flames I'm out $400 and I can figure out what to do next.

I wish AT&T sucked less. I wish Apple's update were easier to work around. But even if I can't update my iPhone, even if my iPhone quits working altogether-- no babies died.

Posted by: Dave Pooser at October 2, 2007 11:17 AM

I tend to agree with those who are upset with Apple for removing the capabilities they added with their iPhones. That said, I think the sentence that makes the most sense is, "Just take the fucking thing back."

You bought an iPhone thinking it was one thing when it wasn't. This may be due to evil brainwashing by Apple but whatever. But if the iPhone isn't serving your needs, take it back. At the very least, if Apple gets a few hundred-thousand iPhones returned because it isn't serving people's needs, that'll send a far clearer message to Apple than all the blogs on the Internet.

Of course, if Apple only gets back a few hundred, that'll tell them something, too.

I didn't buy an iPhone on Day 1 because there was no way I was going to pay $600 for a phone for which I couldn't develop applications (I have a wonderfully useful--for myself--application in mind). When the price dropped to $399, I was very tempted. $399 and there was a way to develop applications (though not officially supported).

After watching Apple's behavior, though, I'm pretty sure I'll wait on an iPhone until there's an official way to develop applications. In the meantime, maybe I'll start playing with OpenMoko and Linux or hang out for the next generation of Palm's software.

Posted by: Peter at October 2, 2007 12:27 PM

Peter writes:

I tend to agree with those who are upset with Apple for removing the capabilities they added with their iPhones.

After thinking about this for a while -- and I'm someone who has a fair number of third-party apps stuffed on his iPhone, and still hasn't run the 1.1.1 upgrade -- I don't agree. I'm sympathetic to those who are upset about it, but is Apple taking away features that any of us expected to be on the phone when we bought it? They certainly aren't features that Apple ever claimed to support. It'd be great if Apple didn't do things that screwed over the hackers, sure, but the fact that this update does seem to do exactly that isn't prima facie evidence of malicious intent. The iPhone SDK may not exist outside of Apple because when you publish the API, you're pretty much committing to not radically breaking it from that point on -- and that may be a commitment Apple hasn't wanted to make.

The simple fact is that if you install the 1.1.1 update and end up with an iPhone that only works with AT&T and only works with Apple's installed applications, what you have is... exactly the phone you bought, with exactly the features that you were told it had. Again, I'm sympathetic to people upset at losing the hacked-in functionality, and I think it's important in the long run for Apple to make an official SDK. (I suspect if this happens, you should look to the T-Mobile Sidekick for an idea of how it'll work--i.e., don't expect applications that aren't approved by Apple to be available for it.) But Apple isn't betraying anyone's trust with this update. If you "bought an iPhone thinking it was one thing when it wasn't," with all due respect, it's pretty much your fault.

I do find it sociologically interesting how Apple tends to get a lot of hatred and vitriol directed at them when they things that, well, nobody would bat an eye at from other companies. When Sony updated the PSP software to make it difficult to hack, there was hardly a huge uprising. This phenomena started with the iPhone even before the thing was released; I saw more than one "why the iPhone sucks and will fail" article predicated on all the things the iPhone won't do that no other phone does, either, except that in the iPhone's case those were critical omissions. What exactly is it about Apple that brings this out?

Posted by: Watts at October 2, 2007 1:15 PM

Oh, wow, thanks for writing this. You saved me from having to do it. The wailing and gnashing of teeth over the 1.1.1 update has just gotten worse over the past few days. (TUAW, 9to5Mac, I'm looking at you.)

I bought an iPhone on launch day. I fully knew then that it was a closed device. I knew what features it had and what it didn't. I bought it because I felt that it was the device on the market that best met my needs. It doesn't perfectly meet them, but then no device does. I've been watching the hacking stuff because I think it's interesting to see what they've been able to do with it. But nothing that's been accomplished so far has been compelling enough for me to do anything myself. Honestly, the most compelling thing for me was the game developed for it.

Posted by: Nadyne Mielke at October 2, 2007 2:07 PM

Peter, if you're going to wait on *Palm* to deliver anything beyond Windows Mobile devices, good luck with that. If that's your strategy, I highly recommend Nokia.

What pisses people off is that the damned thing does exactly what it was advertised to do. I don't know WHY this is a bad thing, but for a small group of squabs, it really is. Whatever.

On the corporate account thing, I kind of get that. Well, I get not recommending it. Not selling it, not so much. There are things that a lot of corporate users would need that the iPhone doesn't do, and stupidity is just as common in business as anywhere else.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 2, 2007 3:46 PM

That's a good point Nadyne. It's not that I am *against* people hacking it. On the contrary, i think it's kinda cool.

But the insistence that Apple some how support something they've said they are not going to support is just inane and entitlementism writ large.

I'm also really tired of the propogation of the first ScobleMyth: "To be successfull, geeks and technophiles must love your product, therefore you must design for them."

that's just the stupid right there.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 2, 2007 4:25 PM

Man, I'm glad someone said this.

Those hackers are impatient, arrogant, and believe that they know better than Apple, who has Steve Jobs and a marketing department that obviously does nothing but scheme to irritate developers and hackers.

Posted by: mark at October 2, 2007 4:53 PM

On the corporate account thing, I kind of get that. Well, I get not recommending it. Not selling it, not so much. There are things that a lot of corporate users would need that the iPhone doesn't do, and stupidity is just as common in business as anywhere else.

It's like anything else-- advertise what it'll do and let corporate users/IT decide if it fits. What I want is a way for a non-technical manager to easily read and reply to IMAP email, and the iPhone is perfect for that niche-- but AT&T knows better, it seems.

Posted by: Dave Pooser at October 2, 2007 5:00 PM

Summing up John's piece:

"I will reprint every paragraph of your article, misinterpret what you wrote, and then explain why my straw man was wrong."

I own a hacked iPhone, and I actually agree with the general gist of John's article. If you hack your phone, don't whine. It's just that the whole article reads like one of these /. posts complaining about how Artie MacStrawman is such an asshole for claiming that Macs can not possibly be hacked. How many of the people John complains about actually exist?

Personally, I knew I was not going to install an Apple-provided update or bother Apple's support if something went wrong the day I hacked my phone, and I think most people who hacked their iPhones realized that, too. Frankly, I suspect most people complaining about bricked iPhones don't even own one, and just like to complain about Apple in general.

Posted by: LKM at October 3, 2007 6:11 AM

Oh give me a break LKM. Damned near every site on the Mac web has an article whining that mean old Apple isn't supporting stuff they never said they'd support.

Macworld, The Mac Observer, etc.

As well, there's quite a few people taking their hacked phones to Apple stores demanding support. Do a little research on it, and you'll see.

As well, I didn't reprint every paragraph of Rob's article, some of it was too repititious to bother. However, I'm curious, exactly what strawman did I raise? Do you mean to seriously tell me that the geek/technophile crowd is not being a bunch of whiny bitches about this, or perpetuating the first myth of Scoble, and thinking that without their support, a product is doomed?

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 4, 2007 9:14 AM

I knew if I were patient, John would write this article, because it needed to be said and he's the right guy to do it.

I doubt most of the whiners will stop, since they won't get just how entitled they actually are.

Posted by: Al Willis at October 4, 2007 9:52 AM

Excellent post.

I have grown bored with the blogosphere screaming and howling and ranting about the "bricking of the iPhone". The number of phones affected represents perhaps, what, 0.01 percent of the iPhones sold todate? So I definitely resonate with John's "vocal whiny minority" remark. Except, I think it was understatement.

And I can't help but compare the current tenor of the bitching blogosphere with the same crowd at the inception of the iPod. You would have thought that the iPod would be the death of Apple. The gall! Trying to sell a music player for the price of a small PC (keyboard and monitor, included). But, 110 million iPods later, the jury is pretty much in.

Now, the same pundits are blogging the same FUD about the iPhone. Too expensive. Too limited. Too Apple. The arrogance!

The news is that the techie, propellerhead, pundits (who are apparently unaware) have become irrelevant.

One million iPhones sold in 74 days. If anyone were listening to the FUD-rakers, Apple couldn't have sold a dozen phones. But, thankfully, nobody is listening -- except the other residents of the echo chamber.

Posted by: C J Graden at October 7, 2007 8:41 AM

Well for those of you with short memories, just a few years ago Apple was on the ropes and about to go bust, written off by everyone except the loyal Apple "core" of users, who stuck with all the flaky idosyncracies of max os 7.5 - 9 and then putting up with grief and pain - and considerable financaial investment - when X came out. Yes it was a bold move, and yes Jobs and Ives started to make great, designed products from the boiled sweet imac onwards. BUT let no one forget it was loyal mac users who kept the whole thing going - keeping on buying Apple products and taking daily mental hammering from 90 percent of other computer users for staying with and using Apple. So it was that the loyal Apple user was adventurous and innovative, and if it werent for the many "hackers" and third party developers that frankly made the whole Apple experience tolerable in the dark bad days, then Apple would not be around now. So OF COURSE we think the iphone is a mac. Just look at the history. And by the way you can make the hacked iphone a very tolerable mini portable mac. Luvya.

Posted by: pezki at October 8, 2007 6:01 AM

pezki, I fail to see what your "rally the troops" cry has to do with the simple reality that an iPhone is not a Mac, never has been, never will be, and if you think you can make a a hacked iPhone a tolerable portable Mac, then show me you saving a 5,000 word document to an AFP automount in an AD/OD magic triangle environment.

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 11, 2007 11:23 PM

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September 30, 2007

August NPD Game Console Sales

This is my fault, they evidently released this a while ago.

Wii: 404,000 units
Xbox 360: 277,000 units
PS2: 202,000 units
PS3: 131,000 units

Gee, what a surprise, the Wii won again, outselling the second-place Xbox 360 by 1.46:1. Probably the biggest news this month was that for a change, the Xbox 360 finally outsold the PS2. This should be the norm, by the way.

Percentage of change from July:

Wii: Down about 5%. It will be interesting to see if Metroid Prime 3 has any affect on their sales or not, but that will wait until September, as it wasn't released until August 27th.
Xbox 360: Up about 63%, a very nice change for them. We'll have to wait for September's numbers to see how Halo 3 helped.
PS2: Down about 9%. If there's a better statement about how little the public really cares about the PS3/Xbox 360, I don't know what it is.
PS3: Down about 17%, but that's not surprising, since price cuts tend to be blippy. But it's at least over 100,000.

The big news from last month is that according to the numbers at VG Chartz, the Wii has now sold more consoles than the Xbox 360. That's pretty amazing considering the lead time the 360 had, and unlike the 360, the Wii has been profitable since day one. I'm really running out of silly analogies for the waterfall of money that is in place at Nintendo.

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Posted by John C. Welch at 22:00 | Permalink


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Just before I went in for shoulder surgery #2 at the end of August, the boyfriend (finally) purchased a television. (We'd hadn't had one before.) While I was under the knife, he found himself in a Target that had a Wii in stock, so he jumped on it. He enjoyed my recovery much more than I did, since he spent the whole time with his Wii. I haven't tried it yet, since swinging things is officially Not A Good Idea just now.

I'd be surprised if we didn't end up owning an Xbox 360, since Grand Theft Auto doesn't seem to be coming to the Wii any time soon. But it does have the exclusive MySims, which I see we own, but I haven't played it yet.

Posted by: Nadyne Mielke at September 30, 2007 11:19 PM

I admit that now that Halo 3 is out, I'm thinking about getting an Xbox 360.

But only thinking. The price will have to hit $300 before I bite. And by then I'll be able to buy a used copy of Halo 3 for cheap. (I noticed in the store it's $60! Woah!)

Posted by: Robert at October 1, 2007 9:10 AM

HALO3 will help some, for sure. I'd be refusing to buy one, but finally broke down for H3 (and, in two months, Assassin's Creed).

Posted by: Brian at October 1, 2007 10:24 AM

So I started hunting round for a Wii in a bricks n mortar store a month or so ago. I didn't want to devote a lot of my life to finding one, so it took a while.

I turned up at Circuit City in San Jose on Sunday morning, 20 min before opening time, as one of those tracker sites said they had stock.

30 people queued up before opening time, and they sold out of everything before I left the store with MP:3 and a couple of accessories.

Posted by: Nigel Kersten at October 1, 2007 1:26 PM

The problem is, how many people like you are there who really WANT Halo 3 and don't already have an Xbox?

Posted by: John C. Welch at October 1, 2007 11:30 PM

Ordinarily, I like seeing the underdog come out on top, and since the only joke Bill Gates ever told was the one about Microsoft being the second-largest software company in Redmond, Washington, I like that continuing to be the case. BUT...if either the xBox or PS3 had achieved the popularity they were supposed to, the format war would have been resolved in Favor of Blu-Ray by now and that evil abortion HD-DVD would have found its deserved place in the dustbin of history. Instead, it's going to accomplish exactly what RCA's Capacitive Video Disc did: Fail, and ensure the failure of the Laserdisc as well.

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September 21, 2007

Could someone please give the Acrobat team a clue?

I'll buy you dinner at a nice place in San Francisco for Macworld if you do.

Once again, the lead evangelist for Acrobat, Lori DeFurio shows how you can be enthusiastic, motivated, a very nice person, and still not have a clue as to why the Mac universe hates Acrobat, even though we love PDF.

Every so often, the Acrobat teams goes through one of its "PDF GENERATED BY ANYTHING BUT ADOBE ACROBAT IS BAD!" spasms. I think most of the world is insightful enough to see that while there is some technical accuracy to this, the truth is, this is just Acrobat marketing spew designed to fearmonger you into buying Acrobat. The latest version is also Lori's latest post designed to show you how only Acrobat can give you real PDF. Lori's not the only one. Rick Boren, who specializes in Acrobat for the legal profession, has a similar post. Now, I'm not going to bother commenting on Lori's blog. There's a variety of reasons behind this, but honestly, it's mostly because I realized that the Acrobat Marketing team, of which both Lori and Rick are a part of, not only have a total lack of caring for Acrobat users on anything but Windows, but also fundamentally don't care about any business that isn't in their definition of Big Enterprise. Oh, I'm sure they might read this and get six kinds of indignant, but as people sometimes say "the proof is in the pudding" and the Acrobat pudding is sour indeed if you're a small business or on the Mac.

I did attempt to post a comment for Rick's post, pointing out how Acrobat is not a good solution for anyone not on Windows. I tried to point this out in a factual, reasonably non-confrontational way. Rick never published that comment. His right, but I can't say I'm surprised. The Acrobat team is not so good with dissent. The fact remains, Acrobat is non-existent on Linux, and on the Mac, its Office integration is still crippled. This lack of functional Office integration is still justified by statements so blatantly false that at this point, I can no longer be nice and say they're misleading. When Adobe says there's no way to improve Acrobat's integration with MS Office on the Mac beyond what it is today, they are lying. No, they are. I have proof that there are in fact, ways to get more information out of Office documents than Adobe claims. Were they to say "We can't do it in the only way we are ever going to try to do it", then they would not be lying. However, that would not allow them to put the blame on Microsoft. Acrobat marketing is not good at being honest with Mac users. Note Adobe's deafening silence on Acrobat support for Office 2008. Anyone care to start that dead pool?

However, yes Rick, there are lawyers who don't use Windows. If you use Linux, well, Adobe's response could be distilled down to "Get a real OS you hippy", and if you're on a Mac, it's "You're lucky you get what we allow you to have". Note: this is ONLY the Acrobat team. The CS team, i.e. Photoshop, InDesign, Illustrator, etc., have never had this particular "must only care about big enterprise" disease that affects the Acrobat team. From what little I can tell, this isn't even the attitude of the engineers on the Acrobat team. It's pretty much the Marketing team saying this, (and had I not been so sick at Macworld last January, the Acrobat mouthpiece spewing the standard falsehoods would have gotten a rude shock in the form of technical accuracy.) and since the Marketing team makes the decisions, well, the poor suckers who have to buy Acrobat for the Mac pay the same price as the Windows version, but get royally reamed on the feature set.

So let's see here. We should only use Acrobat, a product whose decision-making team has shown, consistently, since at least 2001 or so, that they regard the Mac market as a boil on its ass, instead of PDF making clones, most of which are made by companies, at least on the Mac, show that they care about our needs and appreciate us beyond the money we throw at them. Huh. Now, don't get me wrong, Acrobat is really a solid application, and the full PDF feature set is really damned useful and well designed. But every time I use Acrobat on the Mac, I feel like Pilot-Captain Blackthorne getting pissed on by the local samurai for being a bit too mouthy.

It's not like I haven't tried to talk about this with the Acrobat team. At the WWDC, I tried to set up a meeting with the Acrobat team and some of the Mac enterprise IT people attending that event so that both sides could sit down, and maybe the Acrobat team's decision makers could talk to people they don't think exist, and realize that yes, the Mac market is worth more effort than "as little as possible". Didn't happen. The Acrobat team couldn't be bothered to even show up at a local bar to just sit down and talk. We didn't want to string them up. We wanted to talk to them about how their installers completely fuck up deployment on managed Mac networks, how their first run requirements make setting up deployments of Acrobat and Reader for non-admin users really painful, etc. Yes, there would have been a lot of criticism, but you know what? Microsoft talks to MacEnterprise, Apple does too. But Adobe? Heh..no way dude. That's not everyone on the Acrobat team. There are a few individuals who do try to do the right thing, but as a group, again, the Acrobat team works very hard to make the Mac market think that they don't matter to the Acrobat team. When the protests from the Acrobat team happen, if they do, I will happily show them all the items that prove my point, and wait for yet another round of stony silence, which may be punctuated by angry muttering.

So while Acrobat is indeed a better way to generate proper PDF, so long as the Acrobat team does its level best to make the Mac OS market feel like some kind of boil on Acrobat's ass, they can just deal with the fact that we're not going to be real thrilled about laying out the price to do it the Acrobat way.

Here's one...maybe, just maybe, if the Acrobat team starts treating the Mac market like a group of valuable customers, maybe we'll start acting that way...


...but don't hold your breath.


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Posted by John C. Welch at 15:12 | Permalink


Comments

Nice post, 100% agreed. Of course I'm sure its driving from a revenue perspective as creating PDFs on Windows is painful without Adobe where as the Mac its pretty not required unless your doing serious PDF creation as the built in works perfectly well.

Posted by: CJ at September 21, 2007 3:54 PM

Oh, it's definitely revenue - driven CJ. However, the problem is, that on the Mac, the Acrobat team does no marketing at all. They leave it up to the CS team, who has better things to market. I mean seriously, pushing Photoshop, InDesign, Illustrator, Premiere, et al, you know, apps designed by people who like the Mac community has to be tons nicer than pushing a throwaway app done by a team whose decision-makers don't give a rat's ass about the platform, and have no problem spreading falsehoods to justify their refusal to invest a little time and money into making Acrobat a good Mac OS X application, and actually marketing the damned thing.

I do however fully expect them to announce the end of all Office integration for Acrobat on the Mac in 2008, and I'll further bet that the reason given is that "Microsoft removed the only possible way to do it". Because if they don't, and they say "Oh, we'll just use AppleScript" and they deliver a ton of improvements, then they have to answer why they weren't using AppleScript since at least Office 2004*. As we've seen, they are not so good at the honesty thing.

*prior to Office 2004, Word's AppleScript dictionary was pretty much broke, so that was not in fact a valid option at that time.

Posted by: John C. Welch at September 22, 2007 9:28 AM

All true. But the sad part is I'm not sure which is worse: Adobe's revenue issue or Microsoft's politics issue. Office 2008 for the Mac, while a welcome upgrade, it painting that politics line once again fo