February 25, 2011
So, while I'm trying to deal with submitting shit to the Mac App Store, (Fuck review, jesus, what doofus designed that submission !workflow?) I figured I'd throw the applications up where you can get to them. They're both written in AppleScriptObjC, and in the case of WiFi Analyzer, i left the source code in it, so you can kind of see what I did, and the changes i made. I'll probably keep doing that with every rev, it's kind of fun. It is HEAVILY commented. Kext Lister is not, but it's really just a front end for kextstat with some table love.
Both will let you output to tab-delimited text, (conventional save in Kext Lister.)
Since they're using AppleScriptObjC, they're 10.6 and later only.
Here we go again
It must be spring, we have the first "TEH END OF TEH EYE-TEEEEEEE" article of the year, this one "The end of the IT department" from "David" at 37signals. First, let's be clear: David has a vested interest in this, working (i assume) for 37Signals, a company offering CLOUD collaboration services.
In my "real" job as an IT director, I not only use Basecamp, a 37Signals product, but I'm pretty happy with it. I would much rather use Basecamp than try to run that shit in-house, it's really quite a pain in the ass to implement and support. That doesn't mean Basecamp is effortless, not with a few hundred users, and contrary to what Dave and the boys at 37Signals think, their UI isn't that good yet. But, I'm an IT guy with two decades in the biz, and I do appreciate products like Basecamp. I just don't think they're magical.
Anyway, as we'll see, David's making some pretty far-fetched stretches, and telling half-truths rather a lot here.
When people talk about their IT departments, they always talk about the things they’re not allowed to do, the applications they can’t run, and the long time it takes to get anything done. Rigid and inflexible policies that fill the air with animosity. Not to mention the frustrations of speaking different languages. None of this is a good foundation for a sustainable relationship.
Well yes, unfortunately, when you have limited resources, you sometimes have to exert a small measure of control. When you have to deal with things like SOX, GLBA, or worse, HIPAA, you have to limit what people can do. I'm pretty sure David doesn't want a janitor at a hospital having the same level of access to his data that his doctor does. He's probably thrilled that IT says "no". The problem isn't "no" the problem is how and why IT says "no". I will be the first to agree that too many IT departments are just assholes about it. They take almost a perverse thrill in it. I think this is unprofessional, stupid, and immature. After the amount of time I've been in this industry, I think it should be my job to say "yes" whenever possible. "No" should be rare, and have a solid reason that can be quickly and easily explained. I also have learned that contrary to popular, and David's belief, IT doesn't set nearly as many IT policies as people think we do. In fact, a lot of what we do is because we are ordered to. Some of it is astoundingly stupid. Case in point:
One place I worked, (no, not naming names), was an Exchange shop, and had a perennial problem with vacations. Not as a concept, but dealing with things like time-critical emails sent to people who were going to be gone for just a bit too long. The solution, for anyone who knows anything about Exchange and Outlook was obvious: Shared folders. We said "This is easy. When someone goes on vacation, they give access to their inbox to whomever is handling their stuff while they're gone. When they get back, they revoke access. It's easy to do, and easy to teach." Great idea right? Solves the problem, allows the users to handle it in a flexible manner, and IT doesn't have to do fuck all except teach them a new trick. Management freaked out. There was a torrent of complaints that made very little sense. "WHAT IF THEY GET AN EMAIL FROM THEIR BOSS ABOUT THE OTHER PERSON WHO CAN NOW READ IT?" "What if their boss remembers they're on vacation and waits to send it?" "WHAT IF THEY GET PERSONAL EMAILS?" "What if we're all adults and don't just troll through each other's shit because we can?" On and on. The eventual dictum: We couldn't tell anyone about this feature, but if they figured it out on their own, we could help them set it up.
Yeah, fuck me. That happens more than you think. We actually tried to explain it better than what I wrote. Didn't matter. But, who's the bad guy? IT. Because we're the ones that have to tell people "no" and usually, with orders not to explain why. IT ends up covering so much ass, they should call it "Fruit-of-the-Loom".
The "speaking different languages." thing is stupid. Every industry, every specialty has its own language. The language of graphic designers is just as foreign to me as networking is to them, and accountants? Gibberish. But not to them. If specialized terms are some huge problem, then IT is hardly leading the way here.
If businesses had as many gripes with an external vendor, that vendor would’ve been dropped long ago. But IT departments have endured as a necessary evil. I think those days are coming to an end.
If your IT department is a necessary evil, either you should try actually involving them in the business or...actually involve them in the business. There's no other way, and fortunately, it's a way that benefits everyone. Even if you don't like them, suck it up, and make them a part of things. You'll find that IT people probably have more good ideas than you think. If they won't play, fire them. It's really simple. IT is no more a necessary evil than any other group in a company.
The problem with IT departments seems to be that they’re set up as a forced internal vendor. From the start, they have a monopoly on the “computer problem” – such monopolies have a tendency to produce the customer service you’d expect from the US Postal Service. The IT department has all the power, they’re not going anywhere (at least not in the short term), and their customers are seen as mindless peons. There’s no feedback loop for improvement.
Oh bullshit. That's what that is. Bullshit. First, for the lamer crack on the Post Office, (seriously. If you're going to say that shit on your web site, walk your ass down to the Post Office and try to do their job, and tell them they're lazy bastards) and secondly, the crack about how IT sees its customers. First, David is giving into the myth that "IT" is some monolithic groupmind wherein all remote nodes are clones, and all are ruled by the hive.
No, they aren't. Every IT department I've worked in has been different, and almost none of them saw customers as "mindless peons". We didn't always have the highest opinion of them, true, but we saw them as people who needed to use computers to get shit done, not people who needed to care about the damned things as things unto themselves. We didn't expect them to do, you know, the jobs they're paid to do and start doing IT stuff in addition. But if David thinks, really thinks that we're all some kind of Overmind that only cares about keeping the users down, he needs to put the pipe down. I'm not going to say there aren't some IT departments engaging in that kind of idiocy, but they are, by and large, the minority, and becoming more of a minority every day. David really needs to get out more, and stop assuming that all user stories about IT are the unfettered and complete truth.
As well, given that 37Signals "support line" is either a contact form on a web page, web forums or twitter, he doesn't exactly have any moral high ground about 'feedback loops'. I certainly pay enough for Basecamp, why can't i have a phone number? How come I can only get a response during banker's hours? (I know why, that costs money.)
Obviously, I can see the other side of the fence as well. IT departments are usually treated as a cost center, just above mail delivery and food service in the corporate pecking order, and never win anything when shit just works, but face the wrath of everyone when THE EXCHANGE SERVER IS DOWN!!!!!
He almost has a clue here, (he'll wreck it with the next paragraph, hence the "almost".) The hard truth about IT is this: in an average non-IT-centric company, your best efforts, your most awesome planning and setup will result in, if you are lucky, in people forgetting you exist. IT is, on many levels, like the plumber. You know you need a plumber, but you sure don't want to need them every day. If you want to be covered in glory, be an indie programmer and create Angry Birds or Twitteriffic. Don't be in IT.
At the same time, IT job security is often dependent on making things hard, slow, and complex. If the Exchange Server didn’t require two people to babysit it at all times, that would mean two friends out of work. Of course using hosted Gmail is a bad idea! It’s the same forces and mechanics that slowly turned unions from a force of progress (proper working conditions for all!) to a force of stagnation (only Jack can move the conference chairs, Joe is the only guy who can fix the microphone).
Wow, stupid, insulting, and a ignorant union crack in one paragraph. Triple Word Score. I have no doubt that there are some IT people and departments that think this way. They're a minority, and they're on the way out. First, IT hates, hates servers that require constant babysitting. That shit is tedious and soul-crushing. We like servers that don't need a lot of work, that once properly set up, (and please God, make that easy too), just works. Because it then frees us up to do the fun work. Like figuring out where to go next.
Also, can we please stop with the New Media Douchebag-meme that IT hates Cloud. We do not. We do not hate CLOUD. However, we do not think it is magic. When someone says "Lets put all our critical data and processes on some remote server", we have to say "Wait. Let's make sure we get proper support. Let's make sure we have some SLA in place so we aren't just stuck with outages. Let's make sure they have some form of decent security and processes in place." That's not hating cloud. That's being a realist. IT is about what is, not some fucking fantasy land of Unicorn-Fart Cupcakes. The reason we don't want people using random email accounts isn't because we're fearful for our jobs. It's because we know how often those accounts get hacked because people used "1234" as their password, and we are worried about company data. Cloud is not magic, cloud is servers and clients.
Seriously, it's people like David that make working in a datacenter with no users the IT dream job.
But change is coming. Dealing with technology has gone from something only for the techy geeks to something more mainstream. Younger generations get it. Computer savvyness is no longer just for the geek squad.
I love it when geeks tell me this. I love this assumption that they are representative of the majority of humanity. Fuck, I think I coughed up half a cup of coffee there. Listen, here's the reality of it: Yes, people are far more comfortable with computers than they were twenty years ago. I don't have to overcome anything close to the levels of fear that I had to deal with in the 90s. When I talk about the basics, by and large, the twentysomethings I support get it and understand it.
But do not, even for a minute, think a lack of fear and a certain comfort level translates into technical ability. These same twentysomethings, who are so connected that I'm amazed they don't crap capacitors still look at me like I'm some kind of witch doctor when I start talking about tech on a deeper level. You know what, that's a good thing. It shows that being comfortable with tech is becoming a feat on the same level as being comfortable with your car. But it does not mean you can troubleshoot your email issues or your server issues any more than being a good driver means you can rebuild an engine.
What you are seeing here is "I know a lot about computers. I know a lot of people who also know a lot about computers. Therefore, all people are like us". No. They aren't. But, that assumption shows in cloud stuff, just look at most of the UI out there. (Pro tip: that's why Dropbox keeps kicking everyone's ass.) People are indeed far more savvy about computers. But that doesn't mean they have the knowledge and experience to handle actual IT issues.
You no longer need a tech person at the office to man “the server room.” Responsibility for keeping the servers running has shifted away from the centralized IT department. Today you can get just about all the services that previously required local expertise from a web site somewhere.
CLOUD IS MAGIC!
Right. Okay, so tell me, when I can't get access to basecamp because my wifi is pooched, who do I call? David? The hotel lobby? Some guy? Who is going to help me make sure my CLOUD data is backed up somewhere that I have control over? David? Who's going to help me set backup policies, or vet vendors for compliance with any laws/regulations I have to deal with. David?
See, what David is making it sound like is that you just hook up to CLOUD and bam, problems go away. David is full of shit. When he says "Today you can get just about all the services that previously required local expertise from a web site somewhere." that's code for "Find an IT consultant". Don't get me wrong, consultants are in fact a good option when used correctly. But what do you call a consultant that you're paying a retainer for, so that you can get 24x7 support? Yeah. An IT department. They're just really remote. Folks, if you think that paying someone from a random web site at 3am to fix your shit, or help you is a good idea, let me ask you this: would you do that for your car? Your hot water heater? Not more than once or twice, and you're going to pay through the fucking nose for it. But David doesn't want to admit that working with a consultant is just like working with IT, because you are working with IT.
It's actually a bit more complicated, for example, you say "I want a 4-hour response." "Done". So something happens and you call the hotline. They reply "Got it, we'll have someone there in the morning." "But that's in six hours, I paid for a four hour response." "That's what I'm doing now. I have responded within four hours."
Congrats, you just learned that response is not response is not response. David's not going to tell you any of this, because a) he has to admit that his link-baiting headline is bullshit, and b) he really wants you to think CLOUD IS MAGIC. You want to see how magic cloud is, shut off your network ports.
That is not to say you need in-house IT staff. For smaller companies, especially SOHO, a local consultant is not only a good choice, but may in fact be the best choice. You only pay for what you use. Since they're local, you can have them in, to get a feel for your company and your needs. You're a person, not just an account number. They probably have a phone number you can call. You can talk to their other clients and get references. So on and so forth. But you're not going to get that with a random web site, no matter what David thinks. But then, David does have an interest you thinking CLOUD IS MAGIC.
The transition won’t happen over night, but it’s long since begun. The companies who feel they can do without an official IT department are growing in number and size. It’s entirely possible to run a 20-man office without ever even considering the need for a computer called “server” somewhere.
Oh David, that's the biggest bullshit line ever. That thing you send your email through? That's a server. That thing that hosts your files IN CLOUD? Server. That thing running all of 37Signals' services? Server. Again, David's speaking in half-truths. For small companies, it is entirely possible to never need your own in-house dedicated server. However, that is not the same as never considering the need for a server somewhere. It just means that things like email and file sharing and the like, especially on a small, (and often, quite large) scale are now able to be used without you having to own it and maintain it. That's a good thing. The idea that a company with a small number of users, and simple needs, (No PCI, no HIPAA, etc) can meet those needs without having to buy server iron, and IT expertise is really awesome. It makes running that business really easy. It makes it easier to make money, and pay the people you do need.
You still need to worry about servers, and SLAs and data backups and all the rest. You just have more options now.
The good news for IT department operators is that they’re not exactly saddled with skills that can’t be used elsewhere. Most auto workers and textile makers would surely envy their impending doom and ask for a swap.
Yes. We can try to write columns that tell half-truths so that we can bullshit people into buying our services and vision of the world.| Comments ()
February 21, 2011
SCIENCE IS AWESOME
From PZ Myers, one of the more awesome people on the internet: http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2011/02/why_do_muscles_hurt_after_exer.php
Even the comments are awesome.
How many times do you actually get to say that?| Comments ()
And now for something ACTUALLY important
We're off, to outer space,
We're leaving mother Earth,
To save the human race!
Our Star Blazers!
Searching for a distant star, heading off to Iscandar,
Leaving all we love behind, who knows what danger we'll find?
We must be strong and brave,
Our home, we've got to save,
If we don't, in just one year,
Mother Earth, will disappear!
Fighting with the Gamilons, we won't stop until we've won!
Then we'll return, and when we arrive, the earth will survive,
With Our Star Blazers!
For those not old enough to remember being in late elementary school/Jr. High and waking up at ungodly o'clock in the morning to watch "Star Blazers", (Pre-Tivo!), and then tormenting your teachers with that song sang 3 octaves too high, and off key, along with "FIRE THE WAVE MOTION GUN! PFFFTHHFFFSQEEEEARRRRRBOOM!" sound effects...
| Comments ()
I pity you, you missed out.
February 17, 2011
Epic Racist Moron email Part Four
He just can't quit me:
Email the first
On 2/17/11 12:31 PM, "Mike" <email@example.com> wrote:
Here's the link to the "falsified" article. Read the last paragraph in the article:
"It would be really interesting to work in Bangalore," he says. "But I
was told, 'Daniel, it is against the law for you to work here. You can
come here on vacation, but you can't work here.'"
Time to stop flailing, John.
Hey stupid, I sent you that link something like two replies ago. But YOU said that in the article, an Indian Immigration Official was saying that. Here, your words again:
“CIO Magazine, March 2003:
"You cannot work here Daniel. You can come here for vacation, but you cannot work here".
-- Indian immigration officials to U.S. IT worker Daniel Soong who wanted to emigrate to Bangalore.”
And yet, in the link I sent you, that’s not in the article. That part you made up.
Time to admit that there’s no such law, and you’re just lying about its existence. Or show valid proof via relevant links to Indian Federal Law.
Email the Second
On 2/17/11 1:06 PM, "Mike" <firstname.lastname@example.org> wrote:
On Feb 17, 2011, at 9:08 AM, "John C. Welch" <email@example.com> wrote:
On 2/17/11 12:55 AM, "Mike" <firstname.lastname@example.org> wrote:
I was an employee at several of those companies including Sony, Adaptec, and FWB.
I didn't say you weren't.
From "Epic racist moron email part 2" and I quote:
"Gee, what a shock. Your entire career has been contract programming."
No it hasn't. Not only are you irrational, foul-mouthed, flailing, and inconsistent, you are unable to
even recall what you previously wrote. I've seen a lot of people make fools of themselves on their
blogs, but you're the champ.
My entire career has not been contract programming, as I have already mentioned.
Once again, you're wrong but unable to admit it.
Snerk. Okay, the MAJORITY of your career has been contract programming, with a few interruptions. I was wrong to say your ENTIRE career was contract programming.
Hey! Speaking of wrong, where’re those links to Indian Federal Law banning Americans from working in India? You seem to not be able to produce them.
I said you're overstating your importance and making it sound that you were the only reason
any of them stayed in business.
And exactly when did I say that? You never worked at those companies so you don't have a clue
what went on inside them. I never claimed to have "saved" Sony as you asserted. I did however
save FWB from certain death in 1998 as I was brought in as a turnaround expert by the then
CEO, whom I invited you to contact to verify my claim. Have you done that yet? FWB was on the
verge of dying when I took over the product. Before I got there sales were in steep decline
because the product was broken and a series of teams had beenunable to fix it. 7 months after I took
the project over we shipped 3.0 to press accolades and 5 out of 5 mice. As a result of 3.0 quality,
sales went up and the company was saved, and in fact, put in a position where it was sold to
investors a year later. I was the only reason FWB stayed in business. Without me, they would
have died that year. The CEO told me so. Those are the facts. I never made any claims to "saving"
any other company as you asserted. Now are you going to contact the CEO as I asked to verify or
are you just going to go on blathering? And stop puttijg words in my mouth that I never said.
Sigh, your overinflated claims of your work at Sony would be a good start.
Of course, that didn't work out so well for FWB, did it.
What didn't work out for FWB? The company made so much $ off 3.0 that it was sold to outside
investors.It never would have been sold without 3.0 because the sales were so low before that
due to poor quality that no one would touch it. It worked out quite well for the CEO and owner
who sold the company and left, as I did. It also saved the jobs of around 40 people who would
have been out of work if not for the success of 3.0. It was a project executed perfectly.
What didin't work out so well for FWB?
It’s gone. Dead. Out of business, no longer selling products. So again, how good did that work out for FWB? Dead companies are not doing shit. They’re dead. Sounds to me the only reason for 3.0 was to pump up the value so it could be sold. Nice.
"delusional racist fuckwit" == You have no valid argument and have to stoop to name-calling
like a 3rd grader. Grow up John. You're not exactly acting very
professional, are you?
Coming from someone who used bogus data to back up a racist claim about the intelligence of
It's not bogus data. Entire books have been written on the subject (which you ignored) not to
mentionendless data on the subject available all over the web, which is there if you care to look.
Who placed 14th in the 2008 International Math Olympiad? India, that's who. Who placed 2nd?
USA. That's just one example of valid data. Why does India refuse to participate in world-standard
STEM tests John? So John, your claims of false data don't quite hold up because there is data all over
the place that supports what I (and others) are saying.
And yet, with all this data you say is there, the ONLY links you came up with are one to a single wikipedia article, another one that points to the same wikipedia article, and one from an IQ games site. So where’s alllll the scientifically and valid links proving your claim that Indians are racially inferior, IQ-Wise? You have yet to show them. As well, now, a single Math competition is proof of racially-based IQ inferiority? Um. No. India not participating in contests are proof of racially-based IQ inferiority? No. No that’s not either. You have yet to come up with valid data to support your statements that Indians are racially inferior to Americans on the basis of IQ.
and who STILL hasn't sent me link one to Indian Federal Law making it illegal for Americans to
work there, moral high ground, you has none.
See the link to the CIO Magazine article which I sent. Is CIO Magazine making the whole thing up
John? Lying? Along comes the last beacon of truth left in the known universe - John C. Welch -
to say it's all a lie. You have no credibility when you ignore existing proof. I don't need any link to
actual Indian law because it's been all over credible media for the past decade and is a well-known
God you’re stupid. That article didn’t say the source of those statements were an Indian Immigration Official. YOU said that when you misrepresented the quote. Then, you tried to send the link I SENT YOU as proof, when it shows no such thing. You’re really not used to skeptics, are you.
Also, sockpuppeting, not professional. Cast out the beam in thine own eye before thou pointest
out the mote in mine.
Quoting the Bible are we now? Odd, coming from a moral cretin such as yourself.
Given how constantly you break the 9th Commandment, again, you have no moral high ground for anything. Liar, liar, pants on fire.
Oh...one more thing:
That totally genius application of yours? KEXTList? Yeah, I just created it with...AppleScript. God, that felt good too. Only works on 10.56, but given that it lets me save the output, and, it’s writen with AppleScript, I can live with that small limitation. Oh, the icon sucks, but meh, I can’t do art for shit.
Note that my columns lined up on the first version. I wrote it in between everything else I did today. So total time, maaaaybe an hour.
That sound? That’s me laughing at your superior “genius”.| Comments ()
Epic Racist Moron email Part Three
Not only is he emailing me, he's sockpuppeting the comments! Double Dumbass Word Score!
Two emails this time!
Email the First:
> I was an employee at several of those companies including Sony, Adaptec,
> and FWB.
I didn't say you weren't. I said you're overstating your importance and making it sound that you were the only reason any of them stayed in business.
Of course, that didn't work out so well for FWB, did it.
> "delusional racist fuckwit" == You have no valid argument and have to
> stoop to name-calling like a 3rd grader. Grow up John. You're not
> exactly acting very professional, are you?
Coming from someone who used bogus data to back up a racist claim about the intelligence of Indians, and who STILL hasn't sent me link one to Indian Federal Law making it illegal for Americans to work there, moral high ground, you has none.
Also, sockpuppeting, not professional. Cast out the beam in thine own eye before thou pointest out the mote in mine.
Email the Second:
On 2/17/11 1:17 AM, "Mike"
> You're obviously not good at doing research either.
> Try Google. You do know how to use it, right?
Given how I've been able to eviscerate your "proof" that it's illegal for Americans to work in India, I'd say my research skills have a comfortable lead.
Still not a link to *Indian Federal Law making it illegal for Americans to work in India*.
You have yet to show any of those. The evils of outsourcing, quite a bit of which I agree on, are not the same as links to laws you claim exist.
Of course, the fact you falsified the source for a statement in the CIO Magazine article doesn't help your honesty.
> I do hope the San Francisco Chron is good enough for you:
As an article about Daniel Soong et al, and the problems with stupidly done outsourcing, it's solid. As a link to Indian Federal Law making it illegal for Americans to work in India, it's a complete failure.
In fact, that article doesn't even include your "money quote", you know, the one whose source for "it's illegal for amercians to work in India" you falsified? Liar, liar, pants on fire.
You're not used to people who aren't distracted by your handwaving, are you. Pro Tip: David Copperfield is not a good role model when mine are Penn & Teller.
> While you're at it, email Norm Fong, the former CEO of FWB and ask him
> what I did for the company - if you have the guts to. His current
> company is:
> You can contact him there.
> As a professional, you might want to learn a little civility while you
> are at it.
As a professional you might want to:
Not make racist fuckwit comments on public mailing lists and web sites
Not sockpuppet comments on web sites
Not publicly overstate your role in every job you've ever had
Falsify the sources of quotes in articles you use for supporting data
Not pretend that statements you pull out of your ass are objectively true
I cuss, you're provably a racist fuckwit. I win.| Comments ()
February 16, 2011
Epic Racist Moron email part two
Oh yeah, Mike's back. You knew he would be. Wile E. Coyote, SUPER genius ain't gonna let someone like ME talk down to him.
Well, actually, yes, yes he is, because he's fucking stupid. But don't take my word, feast your eyes on our latest go-round:
> No, I mean like this:
Gee, what a shock. Your entire career has been contract programming. Why am I utterly unsurprised that you're disposable labor. Could it be that you're a delusional racist fuckwit? Oh, I bet that has much to do with it.
Also, you created an application that lists running processes on a Unix OS. Ooooh, that's some genius. What's next, a text editor?
> People who use profanity are generally known to be of low IQ. Try
> reinforcing your argument instead of swearing.
BAAHAAHAHAHA...I'm getting lectured about reinforcing my argument from someone who thinks two links that both point to the same dubious source counts as two separate links, and then used an IQ GAME SITE as an example of a scientifically valid source for global IQ values across populations.
You lecturing me on that is like Vern Troyer telling me about the problems of the very tall. Cute, but clueless.
I also find that being racist dingalings with no research skills whatsoever, to be a far better indicator of low IQ than a love of foul language. Given that I share space with persons of "low intelligence" like Lewis Black and George Carlin, I'm fine with that.
> And you've done what with your life?
I didn't become a racist fuckwit with delusions of adequacy. I win!
> Live off OS X Server and write a few lame articles for MacTech now and
> then? You've never turned down jobs at Apple because you've never been
> offered jobs at Apple. Can you prove that you have?
If only I gave a fuck what you think of me. How much space have you wasted trying to prove your superiority to me and failing miserably? It's funny how being secure in oneself reduces the need to constantly trumpet and inflate one's accomplishments. You should try it some time.
> What else? Nothing?
> What a loser.
> And real programmers don't use AppleScript.
Considering I was able to replicate the core functionality of one of your OMG GENIUS AWESOME APPS with a single line of AppleScript, I think that's far more of a slam on your lame-assed programs than AppleScript
> As for anti-spam, I can prove it. Check the MacWeek archives late 1997.
> You will see the product I co-authored there.
> Can you prove otherwise? Can you give me the names of the people who did
> invent it? And no, it wasn't written in AppleScript. LOL.
Oh, see, once again, your ignorance of how things work bites you in the ass. First, a review of an article you wrote is not actually proof you invented anti-spam software.
Secondly, Sagan's Standard is not your friend. You made the extraordinary claim that you invented anti-spam software. Therefore, as the maker of said claim, it is incumbent on you, not me, to prove that you did in fact, create, from nothing, anti-spam software and that no program had any form of ability to combat spam *whatsoever* prior to your burst of "genius"
That's why I don't make asinine claims about my own self-importance.
You wrote sound tools for a dev environment. That's hardly, as you claimed, being "instrumental to the success of PlayStation at Sony?" Somehow, I think the actual hardware engineers and OS designers had a *bit* more to do with it than some disposable schmuck writing sound tools.
You wrote test utilities. Valuable, but hardly an example of being a SUPER GENIUS. Also, you were contract for what, a year maybe? Being there for yearS, and shipping a few OS releases? That would be impressive. That? Not so much.
> (I can send you source code if you like).
I don't think even your ego could take that beating.
> Not to mention FWB & Adaptec/Roxio:
Yes, yes, you single-handedly saved the company. Funny, you seem to make that claim about almost everything you do. And yet, it's all unbelievable.
> And unlike you, the products I work on get 5 mice and are rated
> "freaking awesome" by major Mac magazines. Meanwhile you're doing your
> little AppleScripts and thinking you are a big shot.
BAAAAHAHAHAHA...."I GOT A GOOD RATING FROM MAC ADDICT! BOW DOWN BEFORE ME"
Okay Vigo, calm down before you get slimed. I'm not the one claiming I saved what, Sony, FWB and everything else. That's YOUR gig. Let's keep it straight:
You: Racist fuckwit claiming to be a super genius and critical to product after product.
Me: Not racist, not claiming anything of the sort, and not under the delusion that I'm a special flower.
There, all straightened out for you.
> Every piece of junk you buy from China gets unloaded at Oakland using
> software I wrote:
You ported an existing library from one platform to another. Useful, but you didn't write the Herbert Engineering Lashing Calculation Library. That would probably go to Rob Tagg and others.
What you did was useful, and useful is always good, but you just can't resist the temptation to make it sound like you invented something you didn't.
Once again, your insecurity ratfucks you. Were you as smart as you desparately want me to believe you are, and even *vaguely* self-aware, you'd stop doing that. But you aren't, and so you continue to pump up your roles in things.
> > Citations. Actual links to indian national law. Because a few minutes
> > of googling would appear to render your claim nonsensical.
> CIO Magazine, March 2003:
> "You cannot work here Daniel. You can come here for vacation, but you
> cannot work here".
> -- Indian immigration officials to U.S. IT worker Daniel Soong who
> wanted to emigrate to Bangalore.
That would not appear to be a link to actual Indian Law. That would be an excerpt from an article. Those are actually two different things, you do realize that, right? Also, there were two issues of CIO that month, March 1 and March 15th. But, we've already established you don't know shit about research, and that you really and seriously do expect your every utterance to be the expression of Truth from the lips of $DEITY
I'm also not seeing your extract. Now the 15 March issue has a nice editorial on CEO ethics, and the Office XP ads are kind of fun, but no Daniel Soong. The Open Source and Microsoft Licensing 6.0 articles are both a hoot and a painful reminder of the "fun" I had with the latter, but oddly, no Indian outsourcing. In fact, there's not a story about outsourcing to be found in that issue.
Maybe the 1 March issue? Well, let's see, because surely, you're not stupid enough to think I'd not check your sources.
Wait, of course, how stupid of me to trust your links. A bit of googling showed that it's actually not a part of any one issue, but rather a "web" exclusive, although were one to put an "issue" on it, the 1 Sept. 2003 issue would be more accurate. A proper link to the full article is here:
And, although an interesting read, it's not *actually* a link to relevant Indian federal law. You may want to learn that "article extracts" and "laws" are different things. Knowing that not everything is the same, even when some things agree with you, is important.
It also does *nothing* to support your claim that Indians are inherently stupider than americans. That one is still bullshit you pulled out of your ass.
Oh, and funny how you change:
"He still gets occasional interviews, but he feels that they are just
for show and that the companies will send the job overseas. Soong
recently decided to send his resume to India, to see if he could get work there.
"It would be really interesting to work in Bangalore," he says. "But I was told, 'Daniel, it is against the law for you to work here. You can come here on vacation, but you can't work here.'"
"CIO Magazine, March 2003:
"You cannot work here Daniel. You can come here for vacation, but you
cannot work here".
-- Indian immigration officials to U.S. IT worker Daniel Soong who
wanted to emigrate to Bangalore."
Funny how "they" suddenly turn into "Indian immigration officials" I should start calling you Technotronic, given how much you continuously pump it up.
> Also see Robert Cringely's column about contacting the Indian embassy to
> emigrate to India and being told they didn't know what he was talking about.
CRINGELY? You're using CRINGELY as a source for anything other than amusement? Which Cringely, there's been several.
And again, not actually a link to relevant Indian federal law.
> Since you're not a real programmer beyond your little 'tell' AppleScript
> statements, you don't know what you are talking about. I suggest you
> stick to your domain expertise - installing OS X Server and showing
> people how to use a mouse and whatever else you do.
You know, you keep calling the guy who replicated the core functionality of one of your AWESOME APPS in a single line of AppleScript "not a real programmer". You DO know that's more insulting for you than me, right?
> Sorry, you lost the argument. And you made a fool out of yourself.
Well, I will acknowledge your superiority in being a fool.
> Go do something with your life, boy.
Already did, dumbass. I just don't need external validation from racist fuckwits. Pro Tip: Stop trying to turn "mildly useful" into "I SAVED TEH COMPANEEEZ!!!!" That only works on those who are even stupider than you.
You're not very good at the whole "proving your claims" thing, are you. You also fail at goalpost-moving.| Comments ()
I get email - Epic Racist Moron edition
So, you know how you can see something epic about to happen? Not the usual "I wish it was epic" shit that you call epic, but some stuff that is just going to be epic, world-class fucking stupid?
On Apple's Mac OS X Server list, there's been a thread about Retrospect alternatives. I've stayed out of it, because right now, I'm using Time Navigator and I honestly wouldn't wish that on anyone.
But then "Mike", aka Michael Mamorose of michael-amorose.com shows up with a crack about "Roxio outsourced all the programming to India, what do you expect". Not a perfect quote, but close enough.
Dave Pooser, a good friend, makes the mistake of seriously responding to him, and well, this is what we get:
Oh sure, they can WRITE code, but as the original poster mentioned, it rarely WORKS properly. LOL.
Average IQ of those 1.1 billion people in India is 81. Average American
IQ is 98. Whom do you want working on your software?
Mr. Singh also worked at Bell Labs under Arun Netrvalli. Bell Labs is
now being turned into a shopping mall and hotel, due to lack of
Mr. Singh also previously worked at IBM which is now being sued by the
State of Indiana for $867 MILLION and the State of Texas for another
huge undisclosed sum. Both lawsuits are due to IBM's failure to deliver
projects that even worked at all, let alone on time. IBM's IT workforce
BTW is 71% foreign.
On 2/15/11 5:25 PM, Dave Pooser wrote:
> On 2/15/11 4:14 PM, "Mike"
>> And you can thank Roxio
>> for outsourcing its development to India. Hire 3rd world workers, you
>> get a 3rd world product.
> Wow, that's... well, stunningly ignorant. There are a billion people in
> India-- you think none of them can write code? How about Amit Singh? You
> know, wrote the book on Mac OS X Internals, created MacFUSE, hfsdebug, and
> fslogger among other major software packages? Oh, but he graduated from
> IIT in New Delhi, so he must be a clueless "3rd world worker," right?
> Sure, a country with a billion people will have its share of idiots. (For
> that matter, our tiny country of 330 million has its share of the stupid.)
> But to lump everybody together as "3rd world workers" comes across as both
> ignorant and bigoted. I think we can probably do better than that on this
That's some awesome shit right there. Of course, there's no supporting links for any of his claims. Idiots like Mike never do that. You're expected to assume everything they say is perfectly correct because, well, they said it.
At this point, I've got to play. Because even for server-admin, this shit is just wrong. So my reply:
On 2/15/11 9:53 PM, "Mike"
> Oh sure, they can WRITE code, but as the original poster mentioned, it
> rarely WORKS properly. LOL.
> Average IQ of those 1.1 billion people in India is 81. Average American
> IQ is 98. Whom do you want working on your software?
Setting aside the stunning racist idiocy in that comment, you of course,
have verifiable sources for all that, including how IQ is being measured,
testing methodology, proof the tests were culture-correct, and finally, the
true bearing of IQ on software design.
Going from your comment, IQ *clearly* has no bearing on whatever it is you
Now, I know, I know that won't be the end of it. Once you out a racist idiot, well, they think they can wear you down. Of course, mikey immediately goes for "I HAVE A BIGGER COMPUTER DICK THAN YOU DO, BOW DOWN BEFORE ME!"
My IQ happens to be 160.
Have you written 22 successful commercial software products?
Did you co-invent anti-spam software?
Were you instrumental to the success of PlayStation at Sony?
Did you work at Apple?
No, you're none of those things.
I can guarantee you I am a lot smarter than you are.
Are you aware laws in India forbid anyone who is not an Indian citizen
from working there?
And you call me a racist?
International IQ numbers are well-established and widely available.
Try actually thinking instead of having pre-programmed, knee-jerk
reactions. PC is killing this country. LOL.
On 2/15/11 7:30 PM, John C. Welch wrote:
> On 2/15/11 9:53 PM, "Mike"
>> Oh sure, they can WRITE code, but as the original poster mentioned, it
>> rarely WORKS properly. LOL.
>> Average IQ of those 1.1 billion people in India is 81. Average American
>> IQ is 98. Whom do you want working on your software?
> Setting aside the stunning racist idiocy in that comment, you of course,
> have verifiable sources for all that, including how IQ is being measured,
> testing methodology, proof the tests were culture-correct, and finally, the
> true bearing of IQ on software design.
> Going from your comment, IQ *clearly* has no bearing on whatever it is you do.
Time to motherfucking party.
On 2/16/11 1:44 AM, "Mike"
> My IQ happens to be 160.
Seriously. You're going to throw that tired-assed bullshit out with no backing data whatsoever, and expect me to be impressed? Since it seems to matter, mine bounces between 170 and 185, depending on the test and my mood. But study hard, I'm sure one day you'll be good at taking tests. Which is all IQ tests measure: How good you are at the test.
> Have you written 22 successful commercial software products?
What, you mean like the crap on your site? Like "Open Accessibiity", that you're still encoding in BINHEX? Dude, are you from the PAST?
Wait, wait, BAAAHAHAHAAHAH...it's a fucking .SITX encoded in BINHEX!!!
Even better, you seriously wrote an application that can be duplicated in a fucking one-line AppleScript, and expect me to be impressed?
tell application "System Preferences" to set current pane to pane "com.apple.preference.universalaccess"
Oh look, all I need is an icon, and I just duplicated your idiotic application.
Wow, I can feel the fucking HUGE AWESOME POWER OF YOUR MASSIVE IQ EVEN FROM HERE.
> Did you co-invent anti-spam software?
Prove it. Beyond you claiming you did. (Of course, you can't, but that's the great thing about idiotic claims that can't be proven right or wrong. )
> Were you instrumental to the success of PlayStation at Sony?
Again, prove it. Beyond you claiming you were. If your work for them was at the same quality as your website, I'm impressed the product survived you at all.
> Did you work at Apple?
I've turned down a few offers from them. But then again, Mike Spindler worked for Apple. So we see that "working for Apple" and "being the ultimate genius" are different things.
Although I will accord you the title of an official "Wile E. Coyote SUPER-Genius". Because yeah, you're that.
> No, you're none of those things.
I'm also not a racist moron with shit photography skills who thinks that black and white is a "make it not suck" spell.
Your post on server-admin
> I can guarantee you I am a lot smarter than you are.
No, actually, you cannot. That would require absolute proof in the form of an all-encompassing test that can compare radically disparate knowledgebases in an objective manner. Said test does not exist. You are, as per usual, talking completely out of your ass again.
> Are you aware laws in India forbid anyone who is not an Indian citizen
> from working there?
Citations. Actual links to indian national law. Because a few minutes of googling would appear to render your claim nonsensical. One quick example:
See what I did there? I provide some vague form of proof.
> And you call me a racist?
Let's see: you made a disparaging claim about an entire race that cannot be universally and objectively proved. Yes, I am in fact, calling you a racist. A racist moron to be precise.
> International IQ numbers are well-established and widely available.
Again, that doesn't show source data or actual tests used. In fact, for rather a few countries, they don't even have tests for them, but rather used tests of neighboring countries, and estimated from there. That would be like using Mexco and Canada's scores to measure IQ data in the US.
What tests were used in India, what was the sample size, how were the tested populations selected, etc.
I can trivially manipulate IQ tests in the US down or up just by taking care in how I select my subjects.
You're a gullible sort, aren't you. Someone waves numbers that say what you want them to say (Brown people are stupid), and you're all in. Some of us are just a bit more skeptical.
Nice try, but that list links back to the first wikipedia article. Separate supporting documentation fail.
You're really not used to people who don't fall down on their knees because you "used to work for apple" are you.
> http://www.iqleague.com/group.aspx?page=1&nameUrl=smartest-country-in-the-worl> d
That's an even stupider data source, as it doesn't agree with your only other data source. According to the wikipedia article, the average IQ in Albania is 90 (not that they actually have tests for Albania). According to the IQ League, Albania is running 114. That's not a minor difference. India climbs from 82 to 96.
Of course, we can see how "serious" the IQ League actually is via their web site:
"Copyright (C) 2008 IQLeague. Our IQ tests are for entertainment purposes only."
And their "partner" sites:
"We thank our partners that keep this site up and running: gambling websites, internet keno, gambling online"
I'm going to go WAY out on a limb, and say that IQ League is not a source for legitimate scientific global IQ data.
So let's see...you have three sources, two of which are really based on the same data, and one that's a joke.
I see you're as good at research as you are at
> Try actually thinking instead of having pre-programmed, knee-jerk
> reactions. PC is killing this country. LOL.
Ah, yes. That old saw used by racist morons everywhere. "Don't be so politically correct". Translation "STOP CALLING ME OUT FOR BEING A RACIST FUCKWIT!!!!"
You're a racist fuckwit.
I think the proof of that is ample.
You know this won't be the end. Wonder how long before he cries that I "violated his privacy" by posting that email. Because you know he will. Morons always do.| Comments ()
February 15, 2011
Amazon Usage Reports = teh suck
Amazon S3 is an amazing service.
Too bad Amazon's usage reports are so shitty that I'm not sure why they bother, and their logging is even worse. What fucking assclown thinks the way they do things is good for non-developer customers?| Comments ()
February 14, 2011
No, they aren't pioneering that either
So while Doctorow and the rest would love to think, act like, and probably truly believe they've created some fantastic new business method with "let people have some for free, and they're more willing to pay for it", I got bad news for them:
You're following in the steps of drug dealers.
Remember that the next time you feel all self-important.| Comments ()
February 11, 2011
About the shoes
February 4, 2011
To all the Androids
<nelson>HA-ha</nelson>| Comments ()
Not even close
Let's see, who to believe:
Black Pixel, a company made of of a group of people, and everyone I've met from that group has been stand up and smart.
John Casasanta, and his delusional acephalic ravings on fapfapfap.com.
Oh yeah, that's hard. Is there a bridge Casasanta hasn't burned? Watching that red-headed idiot scream and throw virtual feces all over his cage, and then expect to be taken seriously is hi-LAR-ious.
I also like that Black Pixel isn't just rolling over and letting Casasanta abuse them the way he abuses everyone who's not kissing his ass. Fortunately for Black Pixel, Casasanta is, in the end, easily slapped back. Once you show him you're not going to take his shit, he quickly retreats to his room, save for the occasional email full of poorly-used profanity. (All of it involving oral-rectal sex. Funny that.) Shit, this drama reminded me to push Black Pixel to all the sane people I know who need iOS apps done and can't do them in-house.| Comments ()
February 2, 2011
Just Can't do it Easy
Those folks who know me won't be surprised by this, but I have a tendency to do things the hard way. Not stupidly, but there's always this voice in me that keeps pushing me to do things in the most messed up way possible, just to see if I can pull it off. I suppress said voice at work, it would be a bad thing to listen to such idiocy in IT.
But exercise...the voice wins. The voice wins big.
Like a few people, I've had a life-long issue with weight. I started gaining weight in the third grade, and coupled with an extremely slow metabolism, well, here's what I had to do to stay at 185 in the Air Force:
- 3-4 days of martial arts per week
- A similar number of days in the weight room
- Working outside on B-1Bs, in North Dakota, at night. This involved hours outside in 20 below or worse. In addition, most of my stuff weighed a hundred pounds or so, and was installed straight up. So, on a normal night, we might lift between 500-600lbs. On a really busy night, we'd crack a ton, easy. With 4-5 people.
When you're 20 and single, you can do that. At 43, not so easy. And the AF work wasn't the hardest part, it was the damned martial arts class. 90+ minutes of Ernie and Sami trying to kill me. You had to keep up, especially because a) Sami was strong enough to fling me out a window and b) Sami was doing this shit pregnant. So really, we had no excuse. Then there were the off days. Where we'd go to the other gym over the roller rink, and Ernie would really try to kill us. Plyometrics, you name it. Ever sweat so much that your pants are soaked? Yeah. (One day, I guess there was a kid's Tae Kwon Do class in that gym after us. We get done, and realize there are 3-4 mothers, with looks of impending terror on their faces, holding their children rather protectively. One asks Ernie, "Is this...the kids'...Tae Kwon Do class???" Ernie blinks and realizes what's going on. "OH NO Ma'am. No, no, no, we're not a part of that. We're just 6 idiots doing this on our own." The mothers all had this look of intense relief on their faces, followed by fear, because we were doing this for fun.)
The thing is, I liked it. I seriously liked it. I'd almost crawl out of those sessions, because I had barely enough strength to get home, slam some advil, a gallon of water, lay in my bed and whimper. But at the same time, I'd realized I'd been doing standing jumps over a rope 4' high. That's pretty fuckin' cool. Well, not to everyone, but it was to me. The problem is, it kind of reset me. Even after hurting my back moving a washing machine, the idea of gentle, easy exercise bored the shit out of me. I couldn't do it. To this day, it has to be something that when I'm done, I'm done. I'm wrung out, I have no more.
Titus is not a gym, Titus is a Hellmouth. It's a "benefit" of my job, in that I get to go there for free. I avoided it for a while, because the way people talked about it, it sounded like a hypermacho douchebag collective. Hard work I like, jackass posers not so much. But then I realized that Gold's was what it always had been: Boring. So I decided to give Titus a shot.
It was not what people made it out to be. It was guided circuit training on a level I hadn't had to try to perform at since oh, 1990. The first night I came home after Titus, Melissa thought I was going to die. It is evidently not normal to alternate between deathly pale and green. But, I didn't vomit, I didn't pass out, and I went back. Because holy fuck, that had been fun.
I'm still going back, because surviving a night of Titus is one of the few things I do that makes me feel like I accomplished something. It's frustrating sometimes, especially when I get my clock cleaned by a 20-something. (The first and second 40-yd sprints, I do okay. The 12th? I'm moving just a tad slower.) But, I lumber through, and even though I'm not dropping weight or building muscle like I was when I was 20, (but fuck, who is), I get a little better every time. And, I have to admit, when one of the kids who plays or used to play for a top-rank college football team, (Titus trains a number of groups who have to be in professional shape. Football players fit in that set), tells me they're impressed by my efforts, even though they're pushing 3x the weight I am, it means something. Sure, it may be just being nice to the old guy, but I've noticed they don't hand out compliments like government cheese. So hearing that is more than a little inspiration, especially on a night when those sadists decide that we need to do 2 different kinds of lunges followed by squats. Ooooooh, the hate, it is strong then.
There are easier ways to accomplish the goal of getting in shape, those ways may even be more efficient. But they just...they just aren't hard enough. (That's what she said.) I guess I'm wired weird or something, but an exercise program designed to gently tone me without excessive effort has all the attraction of cold mush. It's not that I want to be around the twats in a gym who have to scream like they just shat an angry porcupine every time they do anything. Those people are idiots. But when a program can be described by one of the quotes in my .sig file?
"We aren't going to try to train you, we're going to try to kill you."
Yeah. That one. Let's go. Because I know that time will win. But Ima make that motherfucker work for it.| Comments ()
February 1, 2011
THE SKY DONE FELL
No, not really, but fuck man, never let a group of screaming mimis go silent. So yes. Today is the first day in the new dark era of no Xserves.
<insert screaming noise here>
As for me, ah fuckit. Apple's going to do what's best for Apple, I'm going to do what's best for me, and if they coincide, great. The only, only requests I have from Apple are these:
- Could you make it really easy to swap out the power supply on a Mac Pro? The current one's a bit of a tit that way. (For all you dual PSU fuckers, SHUT THE FUCK UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP! SHUT THE FUCK UP! The Xserve was around for FOUR FUCKING YEARS WITH ONE PSU! I know for a fucking fact you bought them anyway. SHUT THE FUCK UP!)
- If we could go from this:
I'd be real happy.
Yeah. That's about it. My overall apathy for the "issue" and lack of giving a fuck for the rest of it, and rage against all the dipshits who are losing their fucking minds over this is beyond comprehension.
Those are really the only two things I'd like to see from Apple for their "server" hardware. The rest? Ah, fuckit.| Comments ()