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Okay, so because some of you fuckers were raised in a barn by the Amish, and never let out:

Urinals
When you are in a situation where you have a long line of urinals with an entrance near the door and an exit on the other end of the line of urinals, the protocol is elegant and simple.

• If only one urinal is available, you take it. Even if it is the kids' urinal.


• If multiple urinals are available, you always take the urinal farthest from the entrance. Even if it is surrounded by other men.


• If you have a shy bladder, you get the fuck out of the urinal line, and take a shitter.

Seriously, this is simple, and yet you dipshits, (you know who you are) fucked this up consistently. It's a urinal in a high-use bathroom. You have to get in, get out, and do so quickly.

Bars
When someone is picking up the tab for a night of drinking, even though they are tipping the bartenders/bar staff, you tip them too, even if you aren't paying. The person picking up the tab is tipping for the bar bill itself, and for the overall work of the staff. You are tipping because that bartender/bar staff still had to do the work to get you YOUR drink. I'm not saying you have to tip for every drink, and doing so at the end of the night is acceptable, but you still fucking tip. Christ, you think it's easy taking care of you drunkards?

You'd think that drinking and peeing correctly would be something that people are taught by their parents. Evidently that was an incorrect assumption. Now you know.

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