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Yet more Snow Leopard File Binding incompetency [UPDATED]

"Hi computer, I would like to open this file"

"No"

"What the fuck do you mean "No"? Open the file"

"I can't, I don't know what it is"

"You don't fucking need to know, I do know, it's an image file, now open the fucker in Preview"

"Eat a dick asshole, the name's wrong"

"How can a name be WRONG?"

"It's wrong"

"What's wrong with "imageacf74f.gif@07de40d3.3a0c4180"? It's a bit incomprehensible, but so what? It's just the name. It's a fucking GIF file."

"It's not a GIF file until the name says so"

"So neither you, nor PREVIEW will open this file until it has the right extension?"

"Why are you asking me questions you already know the answer to?"

"That's fucking idiotic. If that's how you do things, i could rename a Word file to have a .gif extension, and according to you, it would be a GIF file."

"If it ends in .gif, it IS a GIF file. Stupid shit like file contents don't matter, just the name."

"That is actually stupider than Windows"

"You can cry all you want, until i see a file name extension, you aren't opening it."

"Wanna Bet?"

"Yeah...hey...HEY...Fuck you, GRAPHICCONVERTER? You're using an old piece of Carbon shit like that instead of PREVIEW?"

"That old piece of shit knows how to open files better than all that retarded Cocoa ass you think is so cool, so eat shit motherfucker."

"You may have won this round, but I'll get you my pretty. One day, even GraphicConverter will dance to my tune."

"Yeah, yeah, hey while you're skulking try to do something useful. Oh wait, here, so you can understand...try to do something.useful"

"...you're a dick."

"You're useless and stupid, so we're even"

I cannot fucking wait for the Cocoatards to tell me how GraphicConverter is wrong for opening the file because it should never open a file without the right gobbledegook on the end of the name.

In short, fuck you new applications that won't work right. Specifically:

Fuck Preview
Fuck Acorn
Fuck Iris, I'm glad you're a dead product
Fuck Intaglio

You all fucking suck and are buggy pieces of shit for not even trying to open a file based on the name alone. Microsoft Paint can handle this better than you. The old version.

What worked? "Hoary old pieces of shit" like GC, Photoshop et al. You know, the ones with programmers who do the extra work so the user doesn't have to.

Fucking new Mac devs, you're a bunch of lazy fuckers is what you are.

IT GETS BETTER

The file in question was a GIF email attachment. Mail, reading the mime type, knows what the file is. You can display it via QuickLook in Mail. But if you try to open it, Stupid Leopard has no idea what to fucking do. If you hit quicklook in the Finder, that works, AND says it's a "Preview Document".

This shit is broke, and there's no amount of justification and bullshit that can change that.

Categories: Mac Matters

Posted by John C. Welch at 07:11 | Permalink

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\"Hi computer, I would like to open this file\"\n\n\"No\"\n\n\"What the fuck do you mean \"No\"? Open the file\"\n\n\"I can't, I don't know what it is\"\n\n\"You don't fucking need to know, I do know, it's an image file, now open the fucker in Preview\"\n\n\"Eat a dick asshole, the name's wrong\"\n\n\"How can a name be WRONG?\"\n\n\"It's wrong\"\n\n\"What's wrong with \"imageacf74f.gif@07de40d3.3a0c4180\"? It's a bit incomprehensible, but so what? It's just the name. It's a fucking GIF file.\"\n\n\"It's not a GIF file until the name says so\"\n\n\"So neither you, nor PREVIEW will open this file until it has the right extension?\"\n\n\"Why are you asking me questions you already know the answer to?\"\n\n\"That's fucking idiotic. If that's how you do things, i could rename a Word file to have a .gif extension, and according to you, it would be a GIF file.\"\n\n\"If it ends in .gif, it IS a GIF file. Stupid shit like file contents don't matter, just the name.\"\n\n\"That is actually stupider than Windows\"\n\n\"You can cry all you want, until i see a file name extension, you aren't opening it.\"\n\n\"Wanna Bet?\"\n\n\"Yeah...hey...HEY...Fuck you, GRAPHICCONVERTER? You're using an old piece of Carbon shit like that instead of PREVIEW?\"\n\n\"That old piece of shit knows how to open files better than all that retarded Cocoa ass you think is so cool, so eat shit motherfucker.\"\n\n\"You may have won this round, but I'll get you my pretty. One day, even GraphicConverter will dance to my tune.\"\n\n\"Yeah, yeah, hey while you're skulking try to do something useful. Oh wait, here, so you can understand...try to do something.useful\"\n\n\"...you're a dick.\"\n\n\"You're useless and stupid, so we're even\"\n\nI cannot fucking wait for the Cocoatards to tell me how GraphicConverter is wrong for opening the file because it should never open a file without the right gobbledegook on the end of the name.\n\nIn short, fuck you new applications that won't work right. Specifically:\n\n

Fuck Preview
Fuck Acorn
Fuck Iris, I'm glad you're a dead product
Fuck Intaglio

\nYou all fucking suck and are buggy pieces of shit for not even trying to open a file based on the name alone. Microsoft Paint can handle this better than you. The old version.\n\nWhat worked? \"Hoary old pieces of shit\" like GC, Photoshop et al. You know, the ones with programmers who do the extra work so the user doesn't have to.\n\nFucking new Mac devs, you're a bunch of lazy fuckers is what you are.\n\n\nIT GETS BETTER\n\nThe file in question was a GIF email attachment. Mail, reading the mime type, knows what the file is. You can display it via QuickLook in Mail. But if you try to open it, Stupid Leopard has no idea what to fucking do. If you hit quicklook in the Finder, that works, AND says it's a \"Preview Document\".\n\nThis shit is broke, and there's no amount of justification and bullshit that can change that.