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Dear guys who have evidently never urinated outside of home before:

When you are in a public bathroom, wherein the urinals are in a line against one wall, with an entrance near the door to said bathroom at one end of the line o' pissers, and an exit at the other end...there is a FUCKING PROCEDURE!

1. ENTER the urinal area via the entrance nearest the door to the bathroom itself


2. Move down the line of urinals until you find the FURTHEST one not currently in use


3. Piss


4. Leave the urinal area via the exit farthest from the main bathroom entrance, wash your hands and leave.

For the love of Cthulu, the entrances are not wide, and there is no way to avoid you as you are ZIPPING BACK UP! I do NOT, repeat do NOT want to see what your crotchal area looks like, nor your style of underwear, no more than you wish to see mine. Keep traffic moving in the same direction, and things work better. As well, when you do this, you SLOW DOWN ACCESS TO THE URINAL, and I swear, if you keep me away from my goal, I WILL piss all over you.

Jesus, how fucking hard is this. Don't fuck up the line, especially when I know how those fuckers splash, and if you're too stupid to walk in the right direction, you're too stupid not to get urine splashed all over yourself, and I DON'T WANT YOUR PEE ON ME!

Working a bathroom correctly is important, most of us learned this in kindergarten. You were evidently in the back eating paste that day.

Nimrods.

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